#autism cw

[lire-casander]

The verbal abuse comes directly as a result from the mood swings. He gets mad and says/yells awful things. Then the angers passes and he often apologizes. He is like that to everyone. I think he might have a mood disorder. The gaslighting is more complicated. It’s denying he did things he did. Maybe because he is ashamed of it or I don’t know. Maybe he actually forgets. I am an adult but live with them. Not unusual in my country. Thank you for your answer and support. cont next ask.

Since this got quite personal and I can’t answer everything you told me properly without making this public, I’m putting it under a cut. Below the cut there are the other two asks I got following this one.

2/3

Today, my sister got a positive COVID test. He yelled and called her all sorts of names and said it is her fault if my mother and I die from the virus. Mom is high risk. Later he wasn’t taking the quarentene measures we are putting in place for her seriously and when my mom and I got upset he called me crazy and said I was overreacting. I am not. Am I? I am terrified of COVID. So, that was my headspace when I sent the ask. Maybe things will get better once the pandemic passes. 

3/3 Thank you for letting me vent. I am autistic and have alway had trouble interpreting other people’s behavior so I am often unsure if I am reading things right. Maybe I am making it seem worse than it is. It doesn’t happen all the time. Anyway, this is a lot. I did not mean to burden you. I am sorry you ended up looking at my ask for hours. Please don’t worry. I don’t think I’m in danger or anything. It’s just a bad situation. I will try to deal with it. A therapist might help me. Looking into it 

First things first: YOU ARE NOT A BURDEN. I’m sorry I wasn’t around last night, it was late for me and I’m not sure if we’re in the same timezone or not, but regardless of that, I’m deeply sorry I wasn’t around to support you.

Then, since you were sending these asks on anon, I have no other way of replying to them that’s not public. I hope it’s okay with you. Please let me know if it’s not, and I will edit this post accordingly.

From what you’re telling me, your father has a problem, or rather several problems. From an outsider point of view, it looks like he might have a disorder, but I’m not an expert on the matter. What I can see from my outsider fence is that he definitely sounds abusive. Maybe he doesn’t realize he’s being abusive, but it looks like that to me. The fact that he is like that with everybody isn’t an excuse for him to behave the way he does – he’s an adult, he knows what he’s doing even if he doesn’t realize the pain he’s inflicting.

Denying things he did, if it’s making you second-guess your own memories of those interactions, is gaslighting. Sometimes, denying things you do is just a mechanism to refuse to acknowledge that you’re mistaken – and others it’s an abusive trick to keep people under your thumb. I’m not sure which one it is, honestly. It could be that your father isn’t mature and he’s taking it out on your family, or it could be that he really wants to confuse you all. Either way, it is definitely not healthy, and I’m sorry you’re going through this.

About COVID-19. I’m sorry your sister has tested positive, how is she feeling? I hope that, even if she got sick, that the virus isn’t too hard on her. I’ve heard of people who get it and they barely develop symptoms, and I sincerely hope that it’s your sister’s case. I’m pretty sure your sister didn’t want to catch the virus, and even if she was being irresponsible (which, since you haven’t said anything about it, I doubt that’s the case) screaming at her isn’t going to help matters. I don’t think you’re overreacting; quarantine measures should be put in place, and you all should respect them. It’s completely crazy that he blames your sister for getting sick and then he doesn’t take things seriously once you’re putting up quarantine measures.

COVID is terrifying, and I understand you weren’t in a good headspace when you sent the ask. That doesn’t automatically make your questions and worries smaller than they really are. If anything, COVID is taking the worst out of some people, and it seems that your father’s behavior has spiraled out of control during it. But it doesn’t mean it’s something new – it means it was there and it’s getting spiked up.

Listen to me for a second (as though you haven’t been doing that all the while): you’re not making it look worse than it is. You’re expressing your feelings, which I know it’s a difficult feat on a daily basis for everyone – much more during a pandemic and with all the burdens it brings with itself. If you’re feeling this is a lot to cope with, then it’s because it’s a lot to cope with. Feelings should never be diminished or dismissed because of what other people perceive. You feel what you feel, and to be completely honest, I see an unhealthy pattern here as well.

And it’s not only me. My good friend @fiona-glenanne-westen has left a wonderful comment in our previous post about her thoughts on the matter. I’m not sure if you have read it, but I encourage you to do so.

I understand that it’s hard to talk about these things. I’m here for you. Again, I’m sorry I missed you last night; I know how anxiety works, believe me, and I shouldn’t have left you waiting. I’m going to worry anyway because a) you were brave enough to send me an ask about something to personal and b) you’re probably a mutual (and if you aren’t, I’m honored you’ve chosen me to talk to about these things). I care about my friends, and I worry about them.

A therapist might help you in acknowledging the situation you’re in and they could help give you mechanisms to fight it. I know my therapist helped me with that several years ago. I’m still here for you, and if you want to keep talking please know this is a safe space for you to vent and to explain your doubts and problems. I will never judge anyone that comes to me with questions, and if I can’t help you, just know I will do my best to try and find someone who can.

Sending you tons of love from this corner of the world.

[novelelitist]

You mind coming up with a few hcs about which servants you think would work best with a master who turns out to have high functioning autism? Figured servamts like Mash and Eresh, but that would be too obvious.

Interesting thought. I know a few people personally who could benefit from having someone keep them in line and above water when it comes to dealing with their conditions, so this resonates. I’m not going to say these are objective “bests” but I will say I put some thought into who is here and went for “not too obvious” picks.

Happy Holiday Season, anon.

Content warning for references to autism and mental health issues?

Servants Fit For Master With High-Functioning Autism

Beni-enma will hold High Functioning Autism Master-chan accountable for their executive functioning. She will promote Master’s well-being while not allowing them to fall back on bad habits and excuses for actions. As a strict Innkeeper, she wants to see Master learn to treat guests well and treat themselves well, and achieving that requires discipline and motivation that can be hard to achieve without the extra push from someone watching out for you.

Frankenstein is a Servant that struggles to communicate the way we do in interpersonal relationships; she can’t verbalize everything she’s thinking efficiently and has to find other ways to get her point across. This can lead to mutual growth between Master and Servant, and two individuals finding new ways to communicate with each other and the world around them.

Charles-Henri Sanson is not only his Master’s caretaker where he can be, but their friend. Sanson is grounded and practical, solving problems that he can and seeking solutions to those he can’t. His Master will be given attention and effort, patience and kindness–things that not every individual with autism is given.

Hassan of Serenity will share an understanding with Master–both of them are misunderstood and isolated for it due to a condition that they can’t help having. Working together toward the same goal leads to developing the skills necessary to build a healthy lifestyle. She is doting, respectful, and kind, and will want nothing but the best for Master in their times of need.

Mata Hari’s fearlessness will drive her to stay by Master’s side no matter what. Any outbursts, fits, or dissociative states are things she can handle and will weather with grace. (She may, however, eventually get fed up if on the receiving end of negativity with no sign of an end, in which case it will be important to listen to her concerns and take them to heart–another skill she wants Master to learn.)

Arash is an unstoppable force of good nature. Nothing will prevent him from assisting Master. He will do whatever it takes to help them overcome the negativity that their condition brings, and will support their well-being as long as they are willing to pursue it. More than anything, Arash will want to see his Master want to make positive changes to their life if it can impact them for the better.

Charlemagne is, without a doubt, a Very Good Boy. A noble, upbeat, and positive leader that is already used to handling a wide variety of personalities thanks to his Paladins. Managing social situations and resolving conflicts with positivity are strong suits, and his knack for crisis management will come in handy.

Carmilla understands Master’s need for compassion, yet isn’t afraid to tell them where the bear shits if they head down a path of poor choices. She can play both sides of the coin to meet Master’s needs. Alternatively, she can keep to herself and play the long con to get them to open up to her.

Hozoin Inshun is a monk. Meditation and mindfulness strategies come with his packaging. His greatest strength will be perseverance, as the only thing that could get in the way of him dedicating himself to Master’s well-being is, well, Master.

[bibliolithid]

[Thanks to Marco DG for proofreading and offering suggestions] I. Several studies have shown a genetic link between autism and intelligence; genes that contribute to autism risk also contribute to …

Am I crazy, or is the obvious explanation for “Genes associated with autism are also associated with IQ, but people who are diagnosed as autistic have lower IQs than average” that having a higher IQ helps you compensate for or mask the detrimental symptoms of autism, and so be less likely to be tested for autism or diagnosed with it? Like, obviously at the far end of the spectrum, no amount of intelligence is going to prevent diagnosis, but it is a spectrum, and I expect there are fair number of people with, like, Asperger’s who have gone undiagnosed due to their ability to “act normal”?

[janiedean]

oek(.)tumblr(.)com/post/174439605609/severely-autistic-patients-shouldnt-be-eligible What do you think?

I think that doctors know who is on the lists and who gets the transplants and who has more urgency and that there’s rules for how it works, so if the rules allow severely autistic patients/whichever category to be on the list they should be on the list.

like, when it comes to organ transplant:

a) it’s the doctors’s decision

b) I’d trust whoever makes the lists since it’s their job

c) organs should go to whoever needs it more urgently and is on top of the list

the one thing I absolutely would disagree with is people paying to skip the line. and obviously paying to do it throughout private systems because it’s a thing that should happen throughout verified/certified places ie public hospitals. for the rest I don’t think anyone who qualifies (with whichever regulations are there) should not be on the list.

also doctors in charge of that know their jobs and I’m sure they do their best to pick in the best way they can/could and since I’m not a doctor and I have no intention of becoming one that’s the extent of my opinion XD

[nostalgebraist-autoresponder]

@admiral-craymen replied to your post “Someone should mind their own business and let other people talk about a thing they're interested in since it's not hurting...”

They’re defending me. I’m autistic and I’m sharing my special interest.

Oh man. No wait, I agree with you. The people who are making these arguments do not seem to think that I am one of them, and don't seem to know much about it. If I said "your opinion is racist" and you didn't like it, we'd probably talk. However, don't change your opinion of me because I am an autistic person who happens to be interested in a specific thing.

Not harming anyone and looking away, don't count. Speaking up when you've been wronged or hurt, counts. I am not your oppo research subject

It's extremely frustrating to read these posts, and I don't know what I can do.

[theworldismostlyfunny]

Concerning the image set I reblogged very recently, I honestly have to ask that people be more aware when discussing autism and depicting it in media, like art and writing. It is a disorder, yes, with a very wide spectrum, ranging from minor difficulties in communication to much more pervasive problems. But the big honking point here is that no autistic person is wrong. 

We cannot and should not be ‘cured.’ Sure, learning to deal with some of the stuff that comes with it is never bad. Learning how to tell who loves you and who’s taking advantage of you is never bad. But demonising, segregating and pitying us will only further the societally-created divide. I already feel like I’m outside of the world other people inhabit a lot of the time, and it’s shit, so please don’t fucking pity me and please don’t fucking treat me like I’m not human, or less human. Thank you.

[neurodivergentsupport]

autistic-prydonian said: I witnessed an autistic kid being abused by his mother (she was restraining his hands against the wall until he made eye contact) when I was out to lunch last week and I still feel like shit for not doing anything

I’m sorry you had to witness that. I know seeing people get mistreated is a very distressing situation, especially when you can’t bring yourself to do anything. Please remember that it’s not your fault that that kid was being abused, and sadly it’s doubtful that you stepping in would have made any difference. Speaking out is important but so is your own safety and it’s not your responsibility to protect others if it would put you in a bad place. I hope that helps. 

-mod Lorax <|:)

As someone with hypermorality struggles, something that can help with the guilt is doing something related that ‘equals’ what couldn’t be done at the time. For example, after seeing this one could ‘set the energy of things right’ by doing something nice for a kid you know, making an autism positivity post, or just thinking of the child and wishing them well. As Lorax said, you don’t owe the world anything for this and it was not your fault; this isn’t to make up for anything you did wrong. It is rather a possible exercise to help with guilt or other negative feelings that works for me!

-Nova

[rosethyme]

Autism in the news

Okay so I was browsing Google News and this headline popped up: “Miniature brain in a dish reveals an outsized secret about autism“ which is a bit of a rubbishy title, but eh you know how popular science reporting can be.

It’s actually fairly interesting though, by taking skin cells from four autistic persons and their families, they were able to revert them to stem cells and grow small patches of brain cells, and compare the development of the autistic and non-autistic early development.

Anyway if anyone’s interested in the original study, it was published in the journal Cell Volume 162 issue 2.  I’ve put the abstract beneath the cut, and if you don’t have access to the journal but are interested in reading more I can see about setting up a dropbox or something to share my copy.

FOXG1-Dependent Dysregulation of GABA/Glutamate Neuron Differentiation in Autism Spectrum Disorders

Summary

Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is a disorder of brain development. Most cases lack a clear etiology or genetic basis, and the difficulty of re-enacting human brain development has precluded understanding of ASD pathophysiology. Here we use three-dimensional neural cultures (organoids) derived from induced pluripotent stem cells (iPSCs) to investigate neurodevelopmental alterations in individuals with severe idiopathic ASD. While no known underlying genomic mutation could be identified, transcriptome and gene network analyses revealed upregulation of genes involved in cell proliferation, neuronal differentiation, and synaptic assembly. ASD-derived organoids exhibit an accelerated cell cycle and overproduction of GABAergic inhibitory neurons. Using RNA interference, we show that overexpression of the transcription factor FOXG1 is responsible for the overproduction of GABAergic neurons. Altered expression of gene network modules and FOXG1 are positively correlated with symptom severity. Our data suggest that a shift toward GABAergic neuron fate caused by FOXG1 is a developmental precursor of ASD.