Prompt request: Prompt request: During a class trip to the tower, a group of hydra agents hold an entire level hostage including the group of teens. 1 agent decided to take a girl to another room to assault her. He got her against a table but she grabbed his face and sent electric shocks through him. Now that her power has been exposed she's a target. Her house was burned down and parents killed. The avengers take her to the compound for her protection and they all treat her like a little sister.
Characters: Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Tony Stark, Sam Wilson, Natasha Romanoff, Wanda Maximoff, Reader
Warnings: angstangstangstangst, cursing, death, attempted sexual assault (very brief description)
A/N: So I went super dark with this request. Tags and requests are open! As always, thanks for reading!
One Shot Masterlist
You stared at the fireball that was once your home and tried to process what you were seeing. Glass shattered as flames licked the air, and your jaw ached from screaming so much. Your parents were in there, but your feet were stuck to the ground. You were completely helpless. You finally had enough sense to try and run into your burning home to attempt a rescue, but a strong force held you back. Your feet kicked wildly in front of you as you were pulled farther and farther away from the havoc. A small prick in your neck caused your vision to blur and eyes to droop as the energy to fight left your body.
It was your fault your parents were dead. None of this would have happened if it weren’t for you…
Two Days Earlier
You had seen a gun before on TV and in police officers’ holsters. You never actually expected to be staring down the barrel of one, though. Especially not one held by your 10th grade physics teacher and his colleagues.
“Let’s take it easy,” Steve Rogers said from behind you. His voice was tense as he tried to calm the other nineteen terrified teenagers in the room. Two holes from the warning shots Mr. Jones had fired earlier were still smoking in the ceiling. The keypad for the elevator was also destroyed, leaving no hope of rescue from the floors below. Mrs. O’Neil and Mr. Riley held similar weapons near the other groups of kids. You just happened to have the unfortunate luck of being directly in Mr. Jones’s line of sight when he decided to open fire in the home of the Earth’s Mightiest Heroes.
It was just supposed to be an ordinary field trip to visit the Avenger’s Tower to learn about how technology helped them save the world. How were any of you supposed to know your science teachers were actually HYDRA operatives?
“Son, you don’t have to do this,” Steve said. “You can still walk away.”
In a flash, Mr. Jones had his arm wrapped around your neck and the gun pressed to your temple. You whimpered as your classmates cowered in fear on the floor. You could almost feel his sadistic smile against your cheek.
“I don’t think you appreciate the situation, Cap,” he taunted. With the gun still aimed at your head, Mr. Jones’s other hand traveled down to the bottom of your shirt, and his fingers ghosted the bare skin of your stomach. Hot tears pricked your eyes as you realized what he was about to do.
“That’s enough!” Steve ordered. His eyes narrowed and his nostrils flared as his calm expression turned to one of rage.
Mrs. O’Neil cocked her gun and wiggled her eyebrows in a challenge. Steve had to make a choice. Either save you and watch bullets fly into your classmates, or save them and watch you die.
You shut your eyes and weighed the pros and cons of the decision playing around in your mind. Every nerve ending in your body screamed at you to make a different choice, but you couldn’t. You knew what needed to happen. You looked at Steve and gave him a brief nod of acknowledgement before taking action.
You focused all of your energy to your hands until you felt the familiar shocking sensation you were used to. In one quick move, you yanked yourself out of Mr. Jones’s grasp and squeezed your fingers against his skull.
Hot, white jolts of electricity flowed from your fingertips as Mr. Jones screamed in agony. The acrid smell of burnt hair filled the room as his gun dropped to the floor. Steve used the distraction to rush to Mrs. O’Neil and take her out with a swift body tackle. He knocked her out cold and pointed her gun at Mr. Riley.
Mr. Jones stopped screaming and you finally let go of his head. Panting heavily, you fell to the floor, trying to regain your strength. Mr. Riley laughed maniacally as he pointed his gun at you and pulled the trigger. You shot your hands up and used the last of your electric powers to disintegrate the oncoming bullet. Steve shot Mr. Riley in the shoulder, and the HYDRA operative knelt to the ground with a grimace on his face.
Instead of screaming out in pain, the son of a bitch actually laughed. His shoulders shook as he stared you right in the eyes and laughed.
“Congratulations, Y/N,” he spat. “You’ve just signed your death wish.” He held his gun up.
“Don’t…” Steve warned.
Mr. Riley’s eyes steeled over as he faced Captain America one last time.
“Hail HYDRA.”
He shot Mrs. O’Neil twice on the floor before putting the gun in his own mouth and pulling the trigger.
One Day Earlier
“Absolutely not,” your dad said firmly.
Tony Stark sighed and tried to plead with him. “Mr. Y/L/N, it would be for Y/N’s protection, and yours, to stay in the Tower.”
“She’s been exposed,” Nat added, folding her arms over her chest. “We don’t like what the one operative said to her about her death wish. You’re at risk now.”
Your mom laughed. “You think we haven’t been through this before?” She shook her head. “We can’t stay in New York.”
Steve hadn’t taken his eyes off of you the entire time. You hung your head shamefully as you listened to your parents argue with the Avengers. You knew you didn’t have a choice and that using your powers had been the right decision. But somehow, you still felt like you did something wrong.
“Y/N?” Steve asked. “What do you want to do?”
You swallowed thickly. “Th-they took away my friends’ memories,” you said softly. After the whole incident was done, a young woman named Wanda had used some type of red energy to wipe everyone’s memories. They still remembered the hostage situation, but none of them remembered you using your powers. “They don’t remember it happening. Why can’t we stay?”
Your mom and dad both pursed their lips. “We’re leaving tomorrow,” your dad finally replied. He stood up and your mom followed him to the door.
You sat rooted in your chair, your eyes silently pleading with Steve, Tony, and Nat to help you. But they couldn’t. They couldn’t override your parents’ decision.
“Y/N!” your dad barked. “Let’s go.”
You stood up in defeat and turned to leave. Steve came over and gently squeezed your shoulders.
“You were so brave yesterday,” he said. “You saved a lot of lives. You should be proud.”
Blinking back tears, you nodded. “Thanks,” you whispered.
You walked out the door thinking you would never see the Avengers again and that your life would start over in a new state with a new name.
You had no idea just how absolutely wrong you were.
Some Time Later
Time is a cold, heartless bitch. The worst thing in the world can happen to you, yet time continues to move on like nothing ever happened. The sun still rises and sets, the seasons change, and people grow older. It has no consideration for your pain and suffering as it ebbs and flows each and every day. Your heart can shatter, your breathing can stall, but time keeps ticking.
How long had it been since HYDRA had killed your parents? Hours? Days? Weeks? Months? You had no idea and you had no desire to know. You just wanted your mom and dad back, but that was never going to happen. You could never take back what happened no matter how hard you begged and pleaded with time.
You were moved into a room in the Avengers Compound where you wasted away. You refused to speak, eat, or move. Your eyes stared blankly at the wall across from your bed as time continued to pass.
You were always vaguely aware of different presences inside your room keeping watch over you as you sunk further and further down. Voices floated in and out of your ears as they tried to anchor you to reality. Every day, strong arms lifted you up and forced you to walk the short distance to the bathroom to relieve yourself and take baths. You would muster up just enough energy to wash up, and then you would collapse back onto your fortress of a bed and let exhaustion overtake your body.
Food was difficult. You had no desire to eat, no desire to chew or swallow. Every single day for every single meal, someone sat patiently on your bed and spoon-fed you. Taste was a foreign concept, and you chewed robotically, going through the motions thanks to muscle memory.
And the nightmares. Oh god, the nightmares. Your ceiling was streaked with electrical burns from the intensity of what you saw behind closed eyelids. Cool metal would touch your forehead as you gasped and screamed. It stayed there, completely unaffected by your jolts of electricity. Smooth murmurs whispered in your ear as they changed you out of your drenched pajamas and tucked you back into bed after your horrors had subsided.
It was no way to live, but it didn’t matter when all you wanted to do was die.
One Week Later
Move.
Your eyes blinked open as soft sunlight shone through the blinds on your windows. You lifted yourself on weak arms into a sitting position on your plush mattress.
Move.
Swallowing thickly, you shifted shaky legs over the side of your bed until they made contact with the floor. You gasped as the carpet scratched into the soles of your bare feet. You could feel again.
Move.
You took a deep breath and pushed yourself up into a standing position. You wobbled as your body learned how to work together with its systems again. Putting one foot in front of the other, you carefully walked over to the dresser and pulled out clothes to wear. Clothes were good. Clothes signaled normality.
You changed and combed your hair, working out the knots and tangles until it sat neatly on your head. Your reflection stared back at you somberly. Your skin was pulled taut against your sharp features thanks to all the weight you had lost. Its pale complexion glowed eerily under the bathroom lights, and you could almost see each vein pushing up against your skin. Your eyes looked dead and empty, but each time you blinked, they regained a little bit of shine, a little bit of life.
Move.
You made your way back to the main door and grasped the cold doorknob.
“You can do this,” you whispered, your voice shocking you. It was raw and hoarse from weeks of non-use and nightmares. “You can do this,” you repeated, opening the door.
The hallway was long and silent. Dim lights glowed from the ceiling lighting a path for you to follow. You had no idea where to go, but you knew you needed to move.
You needed to keep moving.
Each step was so focused and concentrated that you didn’t even see a man approach you. “Y/N?” he asked cautiously.
You stopped and breathed heavily from your exertion. The man rushed forward and helped lower you to sit on the ground to regain some strength.
“Easy, easy,” he soothed. You felt the familiar cold touch of metal against your skin, and you looked up at him. Brown hair and calm, blue eyes stared back at you. His left arm was completely made of metal, while his right was strong, solid flesh. “Do you know who I am?” he asked.
You closed your eyes and focused. You knew him. You knew his touch. “B-Buck-Bucky?” you stuttered.
Bucky smiled and nodded as he smoothed a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “Very good, doll,” he praised. “You’re doing good.”
Tears fell down your cheeks as your emotions completely overcame you. “I-I’m h-h-hung-ry,” you hiccuped.
Bucky gave you a small smile. “We can fix that,” he promised. He stood up and helped you to your feet. Wrapping a strong arm around your waist, he helped you walk into a magnificent kitchen. After sitting you down on a stool by the counter, he popped two slices of bread in the toaster and served them to you on a plate.
Despite the blandness of it, you savored every single bite. You focused on each crunch, resolving to pick the broken pieces of your life back up as you chewed and gained more energy. Bucky proudly watched the color return to your cheeks and a tentative smile take over your face.
You sighed contentedly as you finished the last of your toast. You shyly pushed the plate back over to Bucky.
“I think I’m ready for more,” you said softly.
Bucky grinned and tentatively pulled you in for a hug. When you didn’t shy away from his touch, he held you tight a pressed a gentle kiss to the top of your head.
“I'm pretty sure we can manage that,” he replied.
Your recovery increased slowly each day, and the Avengers were amazing. They made sure each day was full of activities and tasks so you never felt alone.
You spent at least 2-3 hours every day with Tony catching up on your schoolwork. He was a patient teacher, and he praised you every chance he got. You caught up on the work you missed and even started working ahead. You would sit in the lab or in the conference room as Tony worked, and you relished in his bold presence.
Then there was sparring. Nat showed you basic self-defense moves, and Wanda taught you how to focus your energy with your powers. Not only did you become a better fighter, but you gained more confidence. Nat and Wanda treated you like an equal despite your young age. You would often sneak into one of their rooms when you should have been doing homework to gossip and watch TV.
Bucky taught you meditation. He had been there from the very beginning of your nightmares, and he could calm you down like no one else in the compound. You would go on nature hikes and sit at the top of a hill overlooking the woods. At first, you had resisted meditation because you thought it was silly, but when Bucky walked you through one of the techniques after a bad nightmare, you didn’t think it was silly anymore.
Sam was always there when you needed some downtime. You two would grab snacks and hide out in the movie or game room. You bonded over Disney flicks and rounds of Super Smash Bros. He was also really good at building blanket forts for you to hide in on your darker days. He would bring in your homework, coloring sheets, and tea and keep you company in the low light. Sam didn’t need to say much to make you feel better; his company was enough.
Then there was Steve. You loved and hated Steve at the same time. He woke you up at some god-awful hour every morning to go on a run to “stimulate your brain”, as he put it. It only stimulated your grumpiness as far as you were concerned.
But you loved Steve’s nighttime ritual. After you were dressed for bed, he would tuck you in and read you a chapter from one of the books Tony bought for you. Every now and again, everyone else would pile into bed with you and listen to Steve’s melodic voice take you on far away adventures. Steve was your best friend, your rock.
Tonight, your bed was crowded with everyone as Steve read from the last Harry Potter book. No one had seen the movies yet, so the book was a complete mystery to everyone. You were curled up between Steve and Bucky in the middle of the bed. Your head rested on Steve’s chest, and the consistent thumping of his heart grounded you as he read the story. Bucky traced random patterns on your arm as he listened intently to his friend. Your legs were propped up on Tony’s chest as he stretched out lengthwise on the bed. Sam stole the farthest corner of Tony’s pillow as he tried to balance himself on the edge of the bed. Nat and Wanda sat cross-legged on the very end, completely engrossed in the story.
As Steve began reading chapter five, you couldn’t help but see the similarities to your life. You were rescued from evil people just like Harry was. You were angry and frustrated by all of the injustices, just like he was. But you also had the support of amazing friends, just like he did.
“Thank you,” you said, interrupting Steve from the story. You blushed as all eyes turned to you.
Tony raised his head and patted your legs. “For what, sweetheart?”
You curled into Steve’s chest and took a deep breath. “For taking care of me. Not giving up on me. Just...everything.”
“Always,” Bucky replied. The others hummed in agreement.
“We love you,” Steve added. “Don’t ever forget that.”
You nodded, a huge smile threatening to overtake your face. Steve grinned back and picked up where he had left off in the story.
You missed your mom and dad fiercely, and there wasn’t a day when you didn’t think about them. But you also knew that you were safe with the Avengers. They were your family.
in the early days, steve doesn't realize the avengers care about him a lot because they are vastly different people with vastly different socialization than the commandos, but then something happens to him in a fight and the avengers collectively flip their lids and that is how he learns he is Very Important to them
Steve had never been a stranger to friendly teasing. Bucky was a little shit, of course, but so were the Commandos. He’d been called every moniker that popped into his friends’ brains: “Captain Tightpants” (long before it was a cultural reference, thank you very much), “Captain Mom,” “Twinkle Toes,” “All-American Showgirl,” “Blushing Betty,” and names far more filthy. But he’d understood why. He was the commanding officer and he was, when it came down to it, a greenie who got damn lucky 95% of the time. Dugan, Dernier, Falsworth, even Bucky, they all would have been infinitely more qualified to be CO, and so he knew where the teasing was coming from. He knew it was his men’s way of telling him they cared for him while keeping his ego in check. (Bucky could’ve told them Steve was a good enough self-critic as it was and they all could just damn well stick to the dancing references.)
The Avengers, though. Steve had no idea what to think of the way they spoke to him.
“Hey, Capsicle, you mind moving to the left? You’re in my sun.” Tony, of course.
“Look at this. I found a fossil in the kitchen.” Natasha, with a smirk.
“Cap, put on a sweater. None of us were planning on a peep show today.” Clint.
“Fair Steven, Anthony tells me you have something lodged in your behind. If you would but visit the healing halls of my mother, she might be able to aid you.” Thor. (Steve genuinely did not know if Thor was in on Tony’s joke or if he’d taken the “stick up his ass” thing seriously.)
It was all so crass and so…so callous. No one slapped him on the back to let him know they were joking, no one laughed, no one turned it off and just talked to him like a human being. It always seemed to be cruel names and cutting comments, never a kind word or even companionable silence. Could people in the 21st century not share a room without biting into each other? Bruce was the only one who spoke to him with anything like neutrality, and even then, he spoke to Steve barely at all. Mostly he kept to himself, holed up in the lab Tony had gifted to him, emerging only for meals and yoga sessions with Natasha.
They’d been through an alien invasion together, had each other’s backs, and Steve had thought maybe that shared experience would ease the rough edges between him and the others, but apparently not. He was the fuddy duddy, the scolding father, the stodgy CO no one wanted around. Message received.
And that was fine. It wasn’t war times anymore, and Steve had read the files. His new team was full of people who were lone wolves by nature, and what’s more, none of them were technically soldiers. Clint had been once, but that was a long time ago. Nat, Tony, Bruce, all lone operators. Thor had been in…something. But it didn’t sound like any sort of military command Steve had been part of–it sounded more like bash anything that moves and strategy or chain-of-command be damned. Fine. Different times. Different circumstances. He could adapt.
He started taking meals in his quarters, exercising at odd hours when he knew the rest of the Avengers wouldn’t be around, tiptoeing around the shared living spaces or using emergency exit stairwells to avoid them entirely. Maybe an apartment in Brooklyn would be better, someplace that kept him out of the other Avengers’ hair and allowed them to relax around him when they did socialize. Which at the rate they were going, would be never.
A few times, Steve tried to arrange team-building activities. SHIELD had given him packets about those. “Build unity through fun!” “A commanding officer brings his unit together! Five easy steps to better group dynamics!” Everything flopped. For all the excitement the pamphlets implied with their effusive exclamation marks, Steve watched as the Avengers awkwardly sat in circles over card games or food spreads, not speaking, not laughing, not doing much of anything besides fidgeting with their phones.
He let it go. They functioned well enough on the field and he…he’d figure something out. Some way to stop seeing bowler hats or glowing cigarette butts from the corners of his eye. Sometimes he swore he could smell them, unwashed bodies muted with mud, a godawful stench really, but his godawful stench. His men.
And the Avengers weren’t. Not his anyway. Not really.
“Steve! We got another landing over here. Jesus Christ, these ones have lasers.”
“Please say the lasers are attached to their heads.” Tony, of course. Another reference Steve didn’t’t quite grasp.
“Guys! A little help.”
“Widow, Thor, you hold the line here. Don’t let them take the bridge. I’m on my way, Hawkeye. Coordinates?” Steve took off at a dead run, wondering if he should radio in Tony for a lift.
“They’re coming in on the Pier. We’ve got stragglers. Trying to clear the civilians but I can’t hold them off and herd.”
“Iron Man?”
“On my way, Cap.”
Steve could hear the whine of the repulsors coming in behind him. He gauged the sound, checked the wind, took a flying leap, and caught hold of the hand Tony had stretched out for him. Tony used the momentum to swing Steve up into a firmer grip, an awkward half-hitch with one arm hooked over Tony’s shoulders and another leg over one thigh. They’d done it a million times in training, a few times on missions. It should have been easy, effortless. But the lasers.
Heat scored Steve’s bicep and then another feverish punch into his ribs. He had long enough to think “Not bad,” and then his leg slipped of its own accord, muscles going limp and lax. Tony must not have realized–Steve hadn’t made a noise, he didn’t think–because the next thing he know, the sky was above and icy wind was whistling all around him. Six burning seconds of hang-time and then concrete, his back on concrete. Except not concrete. Water. Freezing cold so cold.
Not again. Not like this.
Steve blacked out.
Memories. Impressions.
A fervent voice in his ear.
Lightning in his side.
Blue blue blue all-consuming.
Fingers on his forehead.
Ma?
Cold air on his chest
cold cold
cold
For all the missions he’d run with the Avengers, this was the first time he found himself waking in the med bay. Usually it was Clint or Tony, and one very memorable and terrifying incident with Natasha. Steve didn’t get knocked out and normal anesthesia wasn’t strong enough to take him under. No. His bones were set waking, his cuts stitched sans Novocain.
But he knew the antiseptic smell, the dim, warm lighting. The steady tattoo of a heart monitor and the pinch of a blood oxygen clip. Everything felt distant and muffled, like he was experiencing the world through a pillow. Underwater.
Involuntarily, he groaned, tried to jerk away from the thought. A shame his body wasn’t responding. Nothing felt right. Except. Except…
A hand on his. That was what the warm sensation was, right? Someone touching him.
“Steve?”
So distant and quiet, so thick. Prying his eyes open felt like lifting a car off himself, but when he did, there was a face hovering over him. He knew that face. Clint. Clint wide-eyed, unshaven, a cut on his cheek.
“Shit, you’re awake. Let me just, uh…”
Steve’s mind was coming back to itself, his senses sharpening. He almost wished he could push away the awareness, because with it came the knowledge that his body was broken broken broken. He’d never felt anything quite like what he was feeling now, even when he’d been sickly and weak and fragile. His side burned and pinched at him like acid. One arm itched and throbbed in turn, entombed in a thick plaster cast. From the waist down, nothing. Nothing at all.
“Clint?” he tried to ask, but his tongue was thick and dry and useless. In place of words another gravelly groan.
Behind Clint, another face Steve knew: Tony, equally unshaven, heavy bags of sleeplessness under his eyes, hair flattened into an unruly mess. Where was his fancy pomade, his slick, sharp gravity-defying style? But he held a cup of water with a straw and he brought it closer until the plastic was at Steve’s lips.
“Little sips, ok?” he said, trying to smile but mostly looking harried. “It would really suck to get sick all over yourself.”
Steve sipped, and the icy crystal clarity of the water chased away the last of his grogginess, brought the pain straight back to the forefront, where it clawed at him relentlessly. “The Lumerians?” he managed to rasp.
“Taken care of.” Natasha. She appeared at Clint’s shoulder, apparently unharmed, save for the haunted look in her eyes. “We drove them back into the water, apprehended their leader, and made it very clear that the Island of Manhattan was not for conquering.” Her expression went dangerously cold, and Steve almost felt bad for the Lumerians. Almost.
“My legs…” he started, trying to raise his head to look.
Clint and Tony moved as one, pressing him back against the bed. It embarrassed him that they could hold him down so easily. Worse, it scared him.
“Bad idea, Steve.” Bruce in the doorway. Steve could just see him from the corner of his eye. “You…it was a bad fall.”
Breath caught in his throat and his side sizzled and burned with the pain of it. “How bad?”
“Multiple vertebrae fractured, one leg shattered, one arm shattered. Plus the toxic effect of whatever was in their lasers. As near as we can tell, it has a similar effect to puffer-fish toxins. Paralytic. That’s why you fell. Couldn’t contract your muscles anymore.”
“I fell on one side.”
“Yeah. You’re lucky it wasn’t straight on your back. I don’t know…” Bruce didn’t finish the thought, but he didn’t have to. Steve could guess. Bruce moved closer to the bed, looking as grizzled as Clint, as tired as Tony.
Steve hated how his voice came out tiny and injured when he said, “I can’t feel my legs.”
Every face around him froze, eyes darting back and forth, communicating silently with each other in a way they never did with Steve. After a moment, Bruce sighed. “I was afraid that might be the case. In X-rays, t looked like your spinal cord was damaged, but there was no way to know the extent while you were comatose.”
There was a faint ringing in Steve’s ears, like the sound after a bomb. He tried to wiggle his toes, the ones on the side he guessed wasn’t broken into glassy shards. From the bottom of his line of vision he could see a lump where they must’ve been. Nothing. The blankets remained still.
“My guess is,” Bruce said slowly, waiting for Steve to look back up at him, “that the serum will do things for you that wouldn’t happen in normal humans. Not everyone can jump from ten stories up and survive, and that fall into the water would’ve killed a normal human. Your healing factor is unlike anything we’ve ever seen, so there’s a chance...”
He trailed off and Steve looked around the room again. Natasha’s face was still a blank, angry mask. Tony and Clint were both fidgeting, Clint with a straw and Tony with a tablet. Only Thor would meet his eyes. Steve looked back to Bruce.
“I don’t want to give you baseless hope, Steve. There are no guarantees here.”
“There are no guarantees anywhere,” Steve said, letting his eyes slip closed. The pain was worth behind his eyelids, his side burning like an electrical shock. “Thanks for...for sticking around. You guys didn’t have to stay here. I know you’ve got mission reports to file, other things to take care of.”
When he opened his eyes again, he wasn’t expecting the abject shock he saw in Bruce’s face, in Tony’s and Clint’s. Natasha looked almost sad, but Steve didn’t think that was the right word. Thor’s grave face suddenly reminded Steve just how many millennia he’d seen.
“Why wouldn’t we stay?” Tony whispered, and then something in his voice grew heated. “You almost died, Steve. You almost died and you seriously think that we would just fuck off to file reports while you were in here, alone?”
Steve flinched and looked toward Natasha again, taking comfort in her familiar mask. “When you put it that way... I just meant that I’m awake now and you guys are busy. And I know I’m not exactly your favorite CO. I get it. It’s fine. Just...head on back to the penthouse.”
Tony made a noise like he’d been punched. Above Steve, Clint looked crestfallen, like a dog who’d been kicked. “Jesus, Steve, is that what you think? You think we don’t like you?” Clint’s hand on his shoulder squeezed, the movement almost convulsive and possessive. “Of course we like you. You, you trusted us. You trusted a bunch of fuck-ups and freaks to have your back in an alien invasion and you’ve trusted us since then on every mission we’ve had together. How could we not like you?”
Steve could see an IV under the skin of his hand, the tape peeling up at the edges. They must’ve put him on something, maybe a special drug concoction cooked up by Bruce. Steve would choose to believe that and to believe that was why he could feel tears pricking at the corners of his eyes, a lump forming in his throat. “You guys have a funny way of showing it.” Yes. Definitely drugged. He would’ve never said that in his right mind.
Between one blink and the next, Natasha was there, her fingers the barest touch on his face. It was like being brushed by a spider’s web, and Steve wanted to flinch away, but he couldn’t. She held him captive in her gaze, her mouth carved from marble. “We do. We’re all maladjusted reformed criminals here, Steve, and we forget that you’re not. I’m sorry. I should’ve seen.” Before he could answer, she bent and pressed her lips to his forehead, her arm wrapping his good shoulder in a delicate hug. “If you think,” she continued, breath warm on his skin, “for one second we’re leaving you alone here, you’ve got another think coming.”
There was another hand grasping his, the hand with the IV in it. He felt the catch and pull of callouses and tiny scars. From the corner of his eye he could see Tony, looking equal parts angry and determined. Thor towered behind him, his ancient eyes solemn and observant. Bruce circled the bed, ostensibly to check the IV, but once he was close enough he laid his hand on Steve’s head, right above where Natasha hovered.
“I will take first watch,” Thor announced. The others all moved back a little, though none of them broke contact. “Our captain is right in one thing. You all have been too long without sleep. I imagine he would be most displeased with us if we allowed our own health to fall to the wayside.”
“No,” Tony said flatly, his hand squeezing convulsively on Steve’s. “I’ve got a better idea.”
One frantic bluster of activity later, each of the Avengers returned, dragging heavy mattresses and sleep mats behind them, piles of blankets haphazardly tossed on top. When Tony stumbled in wrapped in a red silk robe, a king-size mattress in tow, Steve felt that suspicious prickle of tears again. The meds. Just the meds. He watched as one by one the Avengers settled in, Tony on his ridiculous mattress, half crunched into the wall. Clint was on a sleep mat, leaning up against a wall, bow in hand and quiver at his side. Bruce collapsed onto another mattress, his unruly curls spilling over the wrinkled sheets. Thor, true to his word, sat up in a chair, alert and still armored. Natasha hovered over him, wearing a sweatshirt that looked to large to be hers and a pair of athletic running shorts.
The stared at each other for a moment before Natasha crawled up onto his bed on his good side, carefully laying herself out in such a way that she touched none of his injuries. She opened the book he hadn’t realized she was carrying and began reading out loud, her voice clear in the suddenly silent room. The Hobbit. One of Steve’s favorites. Had she known? Steve snorted. Probably.
“J,” Tony said, “overhead at 25%, table lamp on.” The ceiling lights dimmed and the table lamp flicked on, casting a warm golden glow over all of them. Natasha’s voice settled on them like a heavy down blanket. Steve could hear the faint wheeze of Tony’s deep breathing and wondered if he’d been injured or if his lungs always labored that way. Clint looked asleep, but his hand was still wrapped firmly around his bow--a soldier’s sleep. Bruce had his back to them all, somehow still apart from them even in the cramped space of the med bay. Still Natasha read and Thor watched over them all with glittering blue eyes.
Wrapped in the warmth of it, the slowly dawning realization, Steve finally let his tears flow, relishing in the tickle of them over his cheeks, a reminder that he was alive and maybe he not quite so alone anymore. Natasha wiped them away and paused only briefly in her reading to kiss his forehead before continuing to read. From the corner of his eye, Steve saw his toes twitch.
Summary: The team come back to check up on their teammate and to welcome the two newest members of their family and a plan is made.
Word Count: 2,989
Warnings: Recovery, babies!! No real warnings, just tons of fluff really, tiny bit of smut, swapping POV
A/N: I'M STILL HERE GUYS!! Don’t worry! School’s starting in a few days, so I’ve been trying to get stuff done in preparation for that, but I’ll try to post as much as I can. Anywho, can you believe it? We only have one more part left! It’s been such an adventure and roller coaster writing this for all of you, but I had such a blast!! Let me know how you liked this part!
Reader’s POV
You along with the others piled back into the cars and rushed back to the tower. Steve was literally buzzing with worry for Bucky, the others fidgeting nervously in their seats. You continued with your breathing exercises from your therapist, in order to stay calm. When Bucky laid down with you on Tony’s balcony for your star gazing date, he told you more about the serum. What it does, how it affects him, what its soul purpose was. If it wasn’t for that certain conversation, you would be a complete wreck right now.
Luck was definitely on the team's side as traffic wasn’t that busy and cut the time in getting back to the tower in half. As soon as the cars were parked, everyone piled out of the vehicles, Steve helping you out of the seat and into the wheelchair. Then the group made their way into the main lobby of the tower. Dr. Cho was ready to greet them, the expression on her face giving away her worry.
Tony was the first to speak up, “What’s the diagnosis, doc?” She looked down at the Stark Pad in her hands, then back up to the group.
“I think you all need to follow me.” That was it, there was no further explanations, no other comments, just a quick order and everyone was following behind her, not too excited to hear the news. Helen brings them down to the floor where the Hulk containment room is located, but just before she opens the door leading to the room, she turns around and faces the group.
“I must warn you, that there are some of Tony’s suits behind this door armed and ready if necessary. We needed to take some precautions, but didn’t want to cause him any more harm.” Steve looks at her questionably, you were also worried about how bad this was.
“What do you mean, some of Tony’s suits are in there?” She sighed, a sad look on her face.
“FRIDAY, show them the footage starting from when Mr. Barnes entered containment please.” A screen on the wall lit up and showed the interior of the Hulk Room, then the door opening to reveal one of Tony’s suits ushering a shaking Bucky into the room, then leaving closing the door behind it. What happened next, had the team all on edge with worry. They watched as Bucky screamed as if he was a caged animal ready to kill the handler that had him locked up in the first place. The once dry shirt he wore was now damp with sweat, but it didn’t matter because it was soon ripped off his torso along with the rest of his clothes until he was only in his boxers. There were sharp intakes of breath when his back faced the camera, giving them all a good view of his heavily scarred back and side. The black metal shimmering in the light, contrasting against his red and purple marked skin.
You felt your heart breaking, as you watched Bucky sweat profusely, grabbing his hair, scratching his chest as he tried to breathe even for a second. You cried as you heard his screams billow throughout the room, his skin beginning to flush as his body temperature spiked. Then like a push of a button, the atmosphere changed completely. His body stiffened, an animalistic growl sounded out deep within his chest. The team watched silently as Bucky began to attack the padded door with vigor.
They cringed as he threw himself at the door, beating it to a pulp with his left fist. Managing to tear off the padded interior so it was just metal against metal. Hit after hit, the door began to give way, the door beginning to billow outwards. Which shocked both Tony and Bruce because not only did they just replace that door, they added another alloy to it in which they were more than sure dents wouldn’t be an issue. How wrong they were.
They could hear the metal began to give way, creaking under the pressure of all the built up anger and pain from the force behind it all. Bucky didn’t stop and showed no signs of stopping, even when the metal plates started cutting away at his flesh, leaving a trail of red behind. It wasn’t until a short time after when they heard a loud shout coming from the video. Bucky stilled, right hand clutching the left arm to his chest, leaning his forehead against the door. There was something off about his back, but it was quickly pushed aside as heart-wrenching sobs came through the speakers. His body slid down to the floor and curled up on itself, the video then cut off. FRIDAY turned off the screen, pulling the team back to the present.
“The feed ended just as you guys drove up to the tower. We haven’t entered the room yet just to be safe. From FRIDAY’s readings, his body temperature is now declining, which is good for both our sakes.” Helen told the group as she had FRIDAY open the doors to let them in. Where they were indeed met with a few of Tony’s suits and a billowed outdoor.
“FRIDAY, what’s Barnes’s status?” Tony asked his AI as he made his way towards the room first, Steve following behind him.
“Mr. Barnes has exerted himself of energy, his body temperature is normal, but I’m afraid he’s going to need some medical help, Boss. My scans show that he has quite a few broken ribs from the fight with the door.” Tony nodded as he took in the information, they all heard a quiet voice speak up.
“I’m fine, nothing’ I can’t handle.”
“Mr. Barnes insists he’s fine, Boss, but clearly he’s stubborn and thinks he’s got this handled,” FRIDAY spoke up with a hint of amusement in her voice.
“Traitor.”
“I live to please, Mr. Barnes.” The group took a breath of relief and you just laughed, holding your very pregnant belly as your kids began to kick.
“Yes babies, he’s back. Your stubborn, pain in the ass, adorable father is back and going to be just fine.”
“I’m not stubborn and not adorable, I’m a very deadly assassin, fuck I’m the Winter Soldier dammit! Assassin’s aren’t adorable.” Bucky complained from the opposite side of the door and continued to complain as the group laughed for a short bit.
“Alright, let’s get Mr. Grumpy Gills to the infirmary before Y/N kicks all our asses,” Tony replied, waiting until FRIDAY opened the door for them to find Bucky laying on his side on the floor facing them. A scowl on his face, but you could tell he was masking the pain well. You just hoped this wouldn’t set you guys back any further.
Bucky didn’t have to stay in the infirmary for long, Helen kept him overnight just to make sure and practically forced him to meet with his therapist after he was released to discuss his recent episode. You decided to wait in the comfy waiting area until he was finished, it went on for an hour so you took advantage of your location. When Bucky came out of his therapist's office, you were engulfed in the huge fluffy bean bag that was sitting in the corner. You knew it was a bad idea because there was no way you were getting up.
“Doll, you ready to head back?” You look up from where you sat, to see him staring at you a grin forming on his face. “Let me guess, you lost the battle against gravity?”
“Fuck you.” You tried to sound pissed, but just couldn’t because you were so comfy.
“Maybe after the twins are born, yeah?” Bucky smirked at you as he knelt down in front of you, wedging himself between your legs. His hands resting on your thighs, massaging his way up to your hips knowing how sore you were. If you weren’t pregnant you would’ve pulled him closer to get a little more action, but his hands felt too good for you to want anything else.
“Shiiiit, whatever you’re doing don’t fuckin’ stop.” You moaned out as you felt yourself float away in absolute bliss. Bucky’s head tilted back as he laughed, but didn’t stop from what he was doing. He leaned forward and kissed your stomach a few times before locking his curious eyes with yours.
“How’d you get here anyway?” He asked, looking over to the side where your wheelchair sat.
“Steve came by and chatted with me for a bit and I had him place me here because that chair is uncomfortable as fuck and we are SO getting one of these. Or we’ll just steal this one, no one will know it’s missing.” You smiled widely up at him, knowing that you were definitely getting one of these in the future.
“Oh Y/N I love you.” Bucky smiled down at you and moved upwards to kiss you long and deeply. Sliding his hands up your sides so they rested above your head as he carefully situated himself between your thighs. You felt his tongue graze your lips begging for you to open up for him, how couldn’t you? His lips felt perfect against yours, but he tasted even better, so you granted him entrance. It wasn’t much longer until your hands made their way into his hair pulling him closer to you, nails scratching his scalp, causing him to groan out. You smiled into his mouth as you felt him harden against your thigh. This was gonna be fun. Hooking your legs behind his calves, you ran a hand down his chest, making sure to dig your nails through his shirt.
“D-Doll, what are you doing?” He stuttered against your mouth, breath hitching as you toyed with the button of his jeans, grazing the skin just below his navel.
You tilted his head to the side, making your way down his jaw, pulling his earlobe with your teeth, “Relax big guy, you’re too stressed.” Breathing huskily in his ear as you unbuttoned his jeans, the sound of the zipper being pulled down echoing throughout the quiet space. You slipped your hand down his boxers and took his hard cock into your hand, jerking him softly.
“F-Fuck, fuck, Y/N, fuck,” his face dropped to your neck as he began to breathe heavily, whining out as you ran your thumb over his slit. Using his pre-come as lube to help jerk him off, twisting your hand as you neared his head, then gripping the base of his cock only to slide your hand back up.
“Y/N, babe...please, oh god,” Bucky started to rock his hips in time with your hand, desperate for release, “I’m so close.” You smiled into his neck, dragging your teeth across his skin.
“You wanna cum? You wanna cum just by my hand?” He nodded quickly as he began to shake slightly when you picked up the pace. “Then cum for me baby, cum all over my hand.” You said as you sucked a huge mark on his neck, which pushed him over the edge. His hips faltered as he came undone above you, releasing into your hand.
“H-Holy shit that was hot.” Bucky smiled widely above you before crashing his lips into yours.
“Yeah, holy shit is right.” The pair of you froze from the voice across the room, “What the fuck guys? Seriously?!” Glancing over Bucky’s shoulders, you see Steve and Nat standing there. Nat was grinning, but Steve looked pissed, his arms crossed and red faced. Bucky hid his face in your neck as his best friend just stood there, you just laughed and kissed his temple as you tucked him back into his boxers - after wiping your hand off on them- then zipped him back up.
“Oh come on Steve, I’m pregnant and horny, who has a sexy as fuck fiance. Give a girl some credit.” You laughed even harder when Steve started waving his hands around telling you to stop.
“Just, next time do it in a room where people won’t walk in.” You stilled, staring wide eyed at Bucky who’s head jerked up to look at you with the same expression.
“Uh, well...that might have to wait,” Bucky kneeled back and sure enough, there was a wet patch between your legs. “Fuck, my water broke.”
Bucky’s POV
Helen had me wait outside the room as she prepared Y/N, getting her settled to bring our twins into the world. To say I was nervous would be an understatement, I was fucking terrified. The fact that in just a few hours, I was going to be a real father holding and taking care of two kids.
Fuck
Natasha was sitting down flipping through one of the magazines, something about gardening. Or maybe it was food. Fashion? I wasn’t entirely sure because my brain was running a mile a minute as I paced back in forth.
“Barnes, sit down before you hurt yourself, you’re starting to make me feel sick.” She said still flipping through the pages.
“Already did, if you happened to miss the events of this past year,” I grumbled back as I started thinking of way too many things. What will they think of me? Will the serum be passed along to them? What if I have a nightmare and end up scaring them? Hurting them? What if Albern really isn’t dead and he’s just waiting until the twins are born? My thoughts were broken when a soft hand held my face in place, bringing me back to reality.
“Hey, calm down, Yasha, stop thinking like that. You’re going to be a great father, they have you to protect them. And Y/N will be here as well.” I focused on Nat’s green eyes, breathing in and out as I calmed down. The rest of the team filed into the waiting area just as Nat sat back down, Clint sitting beside her.
“So Frosty, you ready to become a father? Got any names picked out yet?” I fiddled with my left shoulder, rubbing the scars there, thinking of Clint’s question.
“Y-Yeah, yeah I am. Y/N and I haven’t thought of names yet, never really had a chance to.” Now I really started to fidget. After all, that’s happened, I still struggled to be in separate rooms from Y/N. I always seemed more at ease when she was in the same room as me, where I could tell she was safe. Thankfully I didn’t have to wait long, because Helen walked in with Bruce, smiles on their faces.
“Bucky, are you ready? Y/N’s close and she wants you in there with her.” I looked at Helen then back at the group who were watching me with excitement, then back at Helen.
“Fuck yeah I’m ready,” I stood up with jerky movements, still coming to terms with this actually happening. “Shit, I’m gonna be a fuckin’ dad,” I said softly to myself as I followed Helen and Bruce into the room where Y/N was waiting after they had me clean up a bit. She looked tired and so very ready to push, but there was clearly a hidden fear behind her eyes. I rushed to her side and held her hands.
“Doll, it’s going to be alright. Our little ones will be here soon.” I kissed her temple, leaning my head against hers.
“We can do this, right? Because I can’t do this without you, James.” I let go of her hands to hold her face.
“I’m not going anywhere, Y/N Y/L/N, you’re stuck with me whether you like it or not. And these kids? Shit, these kids are going to be so spoiled and I can’t wait to watch and help them grow. And to love them with you at my side.” Y/N gave me a watery smile before cringing in pain, squeezing my hands tightly as another contraction hit.
“Y/N, are you ready to meet them?” Helen asked as she sat down in between her legs, nurses at the ready.
“Hell yes,” she quickly pulled me in for a quick kiss, “more than ready.”
It was a long two hours until we met our first child, our son. They let me cut the umbilical cord before a nurse came by with a blanket to clean him up and weigh him. We didn’t have to wait much longer until Y/N’s contractions picked up again. I brushed her damp hair out of her face and whispered encouraging words into her ear.
“Alright Y/N, I’m going to need you to push again,” Helen told her, but Y/N shook her head.
“I-I can’t, it’s too much. It...it hurts Bucky, I can’t do this.” I kissed her tears away and smiled at her.
“You got this doll, just a little while longer before we get to meet her.” That seemed to help because she was ready to push again. I helped her, by sitting behind her to help her sit up. This was probably the longest five minutes of my life, but soon the shrill cry of our little girl filled the room. Y/N sagged back in relief against my chest, crying out in joy. I carefully slipped from the bed to stand by her side as the nurses brought over the twins, all cleaned and swaddled in blankets. I looked at the girl in my arms and the boy in Y/N’s in absolute amazement. Our son was a good healthy 18.5 inches and 6.25 pounds. While our daughter was much smaller, 16.8 inches and 5.52 pounds. But they were both healthy and that’s all that mattered to me.
We were finally a family and I couldn’t wait until we got to show them off to the others.
Prompt request: Could you do an avengers/teen reader where reader is really stressed out because her parents are getting a divorce and want you to pick a side and you can’t choose who you want to stay with and kids at school keep bothering you and you’ve just had enough so you storm out and run into various avengers who give advice and stuff?
Characters: Teen Reader, Steve Rogers, Tony Stark, Bucky Barnes, Sam Wilson, Natasha Romanoff, Wanda Maximoff
Warnings: none
A/N: So I out all of the Avengers in one place, but I hope it’s what you were looking for! Thank you so much for sending me the request! As always, thanks for reading!
Masterlist
The cacophony of sounds from school buzzed in your ears as you tried to pay attention to your friends. You mushed up your crappy school lunch as Peyton droned on about her parents.
“Ugh, my parents suck!” she whined.
“Why, ‘cause they won’t let you go to out on a school night?” Trey chuckled.
Peyton rolled her eyes like the answer was obvious. “Duh! It’s like they want to kill my social life. I wish they would just disappear or something.”
You couldn’t take it anymore. You shoved your chair back with a screech and stormed out of the cafeteria. No one tried to stop you as you walked right out of school. You had never skipped class before, but you had to get out of there before your head exploded. So, you did the only thing that seemed logical. You ran home, packed a bag, and left.
You trudged into the Avengers Tower with your duffel bag in hand. An invisible storm cloud had followed you since you left home, and its darkness threatened to release at any second.
You were the prodigy web intern for the Avengers. Tony had held a competition for a new web designer, and you had blown everyone else out of the water. Despite your young age, Tony saw your talent immediately. You had been working on Tony’s tasks plus your own high school curriculum for the past six months. Having unlimited access to the Avengers meant you got to know everyone on the team really well, and you considered them all your friends. And right now, you really needed some friends.
“Hey, Y/N!” You turned around and found Nat and Wanda walking towards you. They both stopped when they saw your duffel bag. Wanda stared at you intensely, and you blushed under her gaze.
“We were just about to join the boys for a movie night,” Nat said slowly. “Want to join us?”
“Um, maybe,” you replied. You cleared your throat. “Actually, I, uh, need a place to stay. Do…do you think Tony would, um, let me crash?”
Wanda’s eyes softened, and you had a feeling she could sense why you were here. Shit. “I don’t see why not,” she said softly.
You nodded and followed them to the movie room. Tony and Steve were fiddling with the DVD player and Sam was pouring out bags of popcorn into bowls. Bucky came in after you carrying a tray of drinks.
“Look who it is!” Steve exclaimed. He walked over and gave you a hug. “How are you doing, Y/N? You staying for movie night?”
You shrugged and looked down at the floor. “Um, Tony, can I stay here for the weekend?”
All movement stopped at your question. Bucky crossed his arms, and Sam quirked his eyebrows. Steve pulled away from the hug, but his arms still squeezed your shoulders. Tony stepped away from the DVD player as Nat and Wanda looked at you, concern etched on their faces.
“What’s going on, kiddo?” Tony asked.
“Nothing,” you replied.
Tony raised his eyebrows as he sauntered over to you. “Okay. So you want to stay here because nothing is going on.” He pursed his lips and nodded. “Seems reasonable.”
You just shrugged again in response.
Tony scoffed and shook his head. “No way. That whole teenage sulking thing isn’t going to work.”
“Tony!” Sam chided. “Back off. She can sleep in Barnes’ room.”
Bucky shoved Sam’s shoulder. “And where am I supposed to sleep?”
“The floor? The couch? In here? I don’t care, man.” Sam winked at you, and you smiled for the first time since your arrival.
Bucky took your bag and led you over to one of the big, plush couches. “You’re gonna love the movie, Y/N.” He continued to talk to you as Tony, Nat, Wanda, and Steve huddled together.
“You know what’s wrong,” Steve said to Wanda. It wasn’t an accusation; he was merely stating a fact.
Wanda nodded her head. “Care to share?” Tony asked.
“She’ll talk when she’s ready,” Nat interjected.
Steve nodded his agreement. “Let’s watch the movie. Maybe she’ll come around if she gets comfortable.”
“Fine,” Tony sighed.
He finished setting up the movie as you positioned yourself on the couch. You were extra cuddly tonight, and you scooted so you were sitting in Steve’s lap with your legs hung over Sam’s. Thankfully, they didn’t say anything and just let you be. Your phone buzzed in your bag, and you ignored it. When it buzzed again, you reached down and shut it off, completely ignoring the caller. Bucky glanced at Steve, who just shrugged.
You barely paid attention to the movie, and your mind wandered the whole time. Eventually, your head was laying against Steve’s chest and you pulled at some loose threads on his t-shirt. Your secret bubbled up from your stomach into your throat. You felt like it was suffocating you, and you just wanted relief.
“My parents are getting divorced,” you announced. Your jaw clenched and you let out a sigh. Tears pricked the corners of your eyes as Tony paused the movie. Steve wrapped his arms around you in a hug, and you you buried your face in his shirt. No one said anything for a few moments, and your confession hung heavily in the air.
“Sorry, kid,” Bucky said. He reached across Steve and patted your shoulder.
“Is that why you want to stay over?” Sam asked, gently rubbing your leg. You nodded against Steve’s shirt.
“There’s more, isn’t there?” Wanda prodded.
You nodded. “They want me to choose who I’m going to live with.” You swallowed thickly as a few tears escaped. “How am I supposed to choose?” You took a shaky breath as the tears flowed freely. “I-if I ch-choose my mom, the-then my d-d-dad will be mad, b-but…” You trailed off as you sobbed, finally letting it all out.
“If you choose your dad, your mom will be mad,” Nat finished.
Tony pushed himself off the couch and sat down in front of you. “Honey, I don’t think they can be mad at you if they’re asking you to choose.”
You gulped and wiped your nose on your sweatshirt sleeve. “I don-don’t want them t-to get div-divorced.”
“C’mere, sweetheart,” Sam said, tugging your pant leg. You crawled over Steve’s lap into Sam’s arms.
Now that his arms were free, Steve leaned down and grabbed your cell phone from your bag. He turned it on and saw numerous missed calls from both your mom and dad.
By now, you had calmed down enough that you had stopped crying. You sniffled and cuddled into Sam’s arms further.
“You have to go home,” Steve said suddenly. You sat up out of Sam’s lap and stared at Steve with your jaw open. “I’m serious, Y/N.”
“But Tony already said I could stay here!” you protested. You looked to Tony. “Right?”
“Absolut-” Steve’s glare cut Tony’s sentence short. He coughed and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “I mean, absolutely not. Sorry, Y/N.”
“Traitor,” you grumbled, crossing your arms over your chest. “I hate you.”
“No, you don’t,” Wanda chided. “You hate the situation you have been put in. It’s not fair, but you can’t run away. Tony and Steve aren’t wrong.”
Your chin wobbled as Wanda’s words sunk in. You knew she was right, and your cheeks burned shamefully. “I’m sorry, Tony,” you whispered. “I don’t hate you.”
Tony gave you a sad smile and pulled you in for a hug. “I know, kiddo. Trust me, I could write a book on crappy parent moments.”
“What am I supposed to do?” you asked as you sat back on the couch.
“Have you told them how you feel? About choosing?” Nat asked. You shook your head. “Well, I think that’s a good first step.”
“They love you,” Bucky added. “They probably don’t even realize how what they’re asking is affecting you.”
You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. “You think?” Bucky nodded, and you knew what you had to do. “Do you think someone can drive me home?” you asked.
“Of course,” Steve said.
“You’re always welcome here,” Tony reassured you. “Even outside of work. If you ever need a break from home, you know where to find us. But…”
“But I have to go home,” you finished. “I know.”
“Thatta girl,” Tony cooed, pinching your cheek. You giggled and pushed him away. Steve helped you with your duffel bag as you said goodnight to the rest of the Avengers.
Your future was uncertain, and you would be lying if you said you weren’t scared. But your friends were right. Running away wasn’t the answer, and it was time to face your parents and tell them the truth.
Summary: Wounds heal over time, but scars remain. New memories are made while haunting ones always find a way to resurface. But by the end of the day, it gets easier.
Word Count: 6,334
Warnings: Insecurities, panic attacks, nightmares, don’t piss off Bucky, so much fluff
A/N: This part is….. a one with swapping POVs. Italics are flashbacks and Albern is a creep, oh and there’s like a huge time skip. Can you believe it guys? There are only a few more parts left. :(
The past three months have been torture, not just for you but for Bucky as well. He hardly goes anywhere without a long sleeve shirt on anymore, even in the bedroom he makes sure that his left side is completely covered. He still sleeps closest to the door, knives and loaded handguns well within reach. Most nights he jolts up, ready to attack the intruder, only to find out that no ones there. It takes some time for you to bring him back to Earth and lay back down, even if he doesn’t sleep. He’s never told you he hardly sleeps anymore, not like he needs to, it’s quite obvious he’s not sleeping. But you’re not going to bring it up to him, he’d just deny everything and act as if nothing’s wrong, so you sadly let it slide.
He’s been spending most days down in the lab with Tony and Bruce, letting them inspect his arm. Testing what it does, the strength, what damage he can do, sense of mobility and touch. It took a lot of convincing for him to do this when the guys couldn’t get to him, they all came to you, to see whether or not you’d be able to convince him that he needs to do this, that it was for his own good. It wasn’t easy and definitely took a few days to get Bucky to actually sit his ass down and listen to what you needed to say.
“Bucky, I have no idea what happened back there and you don’t need to tell me at all or just tell me when you’re ready. Whether it’s next week, next month or next year, I don’t care just tell me when you’re ready. But please baby, please just go see Tony and Bruce. They just want to help you in whatever way they can,” you stopped Bucky before he could say anything, “and no, that does not mean leaving you alone so you can take care of this yourself.
I hate that I can’t be there for you, to help with your own progress and if you can’t do it for me, just...just do it for you.” You looked towards Bucky with wet eyes. You hated the fact that Bucky had to relive all his past nightmares all over again. You knew he was given a new arm, you’ve seen the scars, but you were not going to push him into telling you the full extent of what Albern did to him. You both had your own problems and demons to conquer and you’d stay by his side until the day you died if it meant he was getting support from you.
“I...I know we’ll never be the same ever again but, but I can’t lose you again, Bucky. I’ve already lost you too many times and I don’t know if I’ll be able to go through it again. I mean, we’re both alive and we’re having kids! ‘Course it’s not the way I wanted to find out and tell everyone, but kids Bucky, we’re going to be parents. You need to be here for that, I can’t do this alone, not without you! If you can’t talk to them for yourself, talk to them for our kids, I need-” Bucky rushed in and kissed you, stopping from whatever you were going to say next, you couldn’t remember because his lips were pressed up against his.
He hasn’t made this type of contact with you in weeks, so for him to do this was a relief. A breath of fresh air in a suffocating world. You were going to make sure you treasured this moment as much as you could. So you clung to him, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him closer to you, just needing more of...him. His tongue grazes your bottom lip but pulls away before he could go any further. His forehead is pressed against yours, shoulders drooping slightly as you soothed out the worries with your hands. His eyes are still closed, but he doesn’t make a move to pull away. You stayed like this, wrapped up in each other, holding the broken pieces together.
“I’ll...I’ll talk to them Y/N, I’ll do everything, everything they want me to do. I’ll do it for you, the kids, me, I’ll do it. Just...just stay with me when I do, please.” His eyes opened to reveal wet red-rimmed cloudy blues, “I can’t...I can’t tell you what happened, not yet. I promise I’ll tell you everything, I swear.”
You quietly shushed him, “I understand Bucky, I’m not asking you to tell me now, tell me when you’re ready. I’m not going anywhere, we’re not going anywhere, but for now,” you brushed his hair out of his face, curling your hand over his neck, “let’s focus on getting better.” Bucky responded to your small smile with one of his own, as he leaned in to capture your lips once again before leaving you to rest while he sought out the two lab brains.
But now you both were getting help and your lives should’ve returned to normal right? How wrong that was. Some days were longer than others. Days full of tests, getting your blood checked, bandages removed, cleaned, and rewrapped. Then came the days when you were ordered to go see a therapist to discuss “Your mental status to see if you’re fit for public.” This was one of the situations where you wouldn’t be able to do anything, go anywhere out in public until you were cleared from your therapist. So here you were, situated on the therapists’ couch, in a pair of Bucky’s sweatpants, his favorite sweater, and a pair of Tony’s favorite fuzzy socks - who he will confess to no one - already wanting to leave.
“Good morning Y/N, and how are we and the young ones doing?” Mr. Thompson, your therapist, asked you, as he shifted through some papers. You weren’t sure, but there was something about the man that was off. He just gave you this vibe that wasn’t exactly...comfortable. Feeling uncomfortable, you wrapped your arms around yourself.
“Fine, everything is fine.”
“And you’re sleeping fine? Experiencing any pain, having nightmares, flashbacks?” He looked up at you from the desk, looking you over. You eyed him back, wondering what he was trying to get at.
“Mr. Thompson-”
“Kyle, please call me Kyle.” Ugh, that’s why he was setting off the creepy vibes. He wasn’t eyeing you like some doe who couldn’t take care of herself, but rather like a luxurious piece of meat that should be savored.
“Mr. Thompson, as I was told, I was assigned to you to get treatment to a life event that has traumatized me in more ways than one. Now, if you’d rather stare at my chest all day and imagine what it looks like or pull your head out of your ass and actually do your job, then we won’t have any problems.” He gaped at you, frustration clearly burning in his eyes. He stood up and walked towards you, unknowing to him, you pressed the ‘panic button’ on the bracelet Tony made for you. Once you press it, it alerts one of his suits to come find you and protect you at all costs until the cavalry arrives.
“How dare you! Do you even know who I am? You are my patient and I decide what methods are best to treat you! If you ever want to get cleared to be released into the outside world, you will do what I say.” Thankfully the suit didn’t waste anytime because it came crashing into the room and advanced towards Mr. Thompson, gauntlet raised in warning.
“Please step back, sir, for your own safety.” The suit replied, well, JARVIS did.
“What the hell is going on here? We’re in a session!”
“Not anymore you’re not.” You never even registered the door opening, but Steve was there along with Tony. You were surprised Bucky wasn’t there, but you’d ask Steve that later.
“Mr. Thompson, great to see you! See, here’s the thing, since you’re working in my tower, JARVIS monitors everything. So imagine my surprise when not only do I get a report from him saying your heart rate was rising in a very sickly manner and for Y/N to use her bracelet - which I’m really excited it works by the way - only to find out what your true intentions were? Let’s just say you can kiss your job goodbye.” While Tony was giving him a lecture, Steve walked up to you and helped you back into the wheelchair, hands on your shoulders to keep you grounded.
“Bucky is staying in the Hulk containment room, Nat’s keeping an eye on him.” You whirled your head around to look at Steve.
“Why? What happened? Is he okay?” Steve smiled as he began to push you out of the office, due to Mr. Thompson started ranting and was making the situation even worse for himself.
“Let’s just say Mr. Thompson should be glad that Bucky didn’t come with. And we now know he can put a good two-foot hole in a concrete wall. Which was stupid, because he damaged some of the wires from the mere force of it. So Tony and Bruce have to try to figure out a way to fix it, but they have to wait until he cools down first.” By the end of the day, Tony found the right therapist for you, female this time, who was highly recommended by Dr. Cho. The next day, Bucky went back to check in with Bruce and Tony, but he had to make sure Steve was with him, in case he lost his temper again. It definitely wasn’t going to be an easy recovery.
You trusted Tony and Helen, but you couldn’t help but feel nervous when you were dropped off at your new therapists’ office. Steve wished he could’ve gone with you, but he had the training to do for the newest recruits that he couldn’t avoid. So Natasha volunteered to bring you. You both entered the office and as soon as Nat got you situated onto the couch, she came in.
“Hi, my name is Erica Tesla and I’ll be working with you for the next few weeks. If you want to get started, just stop me anytime if you have any questions.” You shook her hand, feeling comfortable with her already. You were very glad Tony chose her.
“If you don’t mind, I’d like to start off with reading off a brief summary. Is that alright?” You nodded and held onto Nat’s hands as she began reading. You never expected this to be difficult, as she read off past events that have occurred, up to the most recent one. You remembered what the pain felt like as the Hydra agent shot you, what it felt like when you couldn’t move. Then the joy that came afterward, when Tony was able to help you walk again. Only to have it vanish again completely when you were ripped away from Bucky then ripped apart. To be tied down, helpless, cold and alone with just him. Him and is cold, bony, greedy hands. How they ran over your skin, caressing you like the prize he always wanted. What he always wanted.
“Ah Miss Y/N, Sergeant Barnes is a very lucky man,” Albern spoke huskily in your ear as he trailed his hand down your back, “knowing you were graced with such soft skin.”
“-! Y/N! Breathe, alright? It’s okay, you’re safe, you’re in the tower. It’s 1:30 pm, it’s 75 degrees with clear blue skies. Natasha is on your left. You. Are. Safe.” You crawled out of the horrible flashback and found yourself staring at Erica’s eyes, Nat crouching down beside you. Erica stayed with you until you began matching your breaths with hers. She smiled softly when you came back, before moving back to her chair. She wrote a quick note before speaking again.
“I think we’ll be done for the day. We made some progress, but I don’t want to put any more stress on the three of you. What I do want you to do, is to go home, eat and get some sleep. You’re taking care of three now and you’ll need all the rest you can get.” She headed over to a locked cabinet and pulled out a container of cream. “I’ve already talked with Dr. Cho and it’s safe for you and the twins. It’s a stress, relaxing cream. Rub this on your temples and stomach when you wake up and right before you go to bed. No more than two times a day though. I would like to meet with you again next week and continue our sessions.” Nat helped you back into the wheelchair as Erica opened the door.
“I don’t want you to do anything else today besides resting. If anyone else says otherwise than they would have to come to talk to me.” You really liked Erica and believed she could actually help you get through this. But there were some things you weren’t quite sure you were ready to talk about to someone you hardly ever knew. You weren’t even sure if you even wanted to tell Bucky. You knew you’d have to tell him eventually, but just like him, it was going to take time and a lot of support.
Natasha brought you up to your room and helped you get into bed, which to you took forever because you were already six months pregnant and feeling like a beached whale. “Would you like me to stay, Y/N?”
You blinked at Nat tiredly. “No, I’m good, Nat. I think I’m just going to sleep for a bit, considering these two have been kicking up a storm.” She glanced from your around belly to you, smiling fondly. A hesitant hand hovered over it, but she pulled away, that was unacceptable to you, however. So you grabbed her wrist and softly placed it on the spot where the twins were kicking the most. Seeming to sense a new presence, they kicked at Nat’s hand excitedly. The assassin let out a small surprised laugh.
“They like you, not surprised about that.” You smiled at the pleased face of your friendly redhead. If there was a content look on her face and a wet look in her eyes, you weren’t going to say anything.
“Are you excited to meet them?” Nat broke out of her trance and looked at you.
“Every day, hopefully, they look like Bucky. Dark hair, blue eyes, his strength…” you let out a small sigh, thinking of the future. Nat squeezed your hand at the mention of Bucky.
“What of Bucky? Is he eager to meet them?” Squeezing her hand back, you gave her a lost look.
“Not entirely sure to be honest. If he is, he’s really good at hiding it.” Your free hand ran over your stomach, smiling to yourself as you felt a kick hit against your palm.
“Does he avoid being around you because of it?” Nat looked as if she was going to rip Bucky a new one. You knew she had her reasons, but you also knew that he was struggling more than he’d like to admit.
“Nat, I can assure you that he is very protective over us, that you don’t have to worry about. It’s just when they first started kicking, I was so happy you know? So I wanted Bucky to experience it as well, but he jerked back saying he wasn’t ready yet. I know he loves me that he loves them, but after all, that’s happened? I just want him to be able to hold me without fearing that he’s going to hurt us. I miss him, Nat, it’s not fair.” Your eyes began to water and you cursed, wiping away the tears as they began to fall. You really hated these stupid hormones, they messed up your day to day routine. Of course, your routine was already messed up, but the extra hormones and emotions didn’t help.
Your feet were killing you, not to mention your back was sore, even though you couldn’t walk by yourself. But you were stubborn and had Steve half carry you as you “tried” to walk. All you wanted to do was talk a hot bath, eat all the food you could find and sleep. Sleep with Bucky’s arms protectively around you, by your side without that nagging fear. You began to think back to the time where both of you were happy with what you had, where you were and how everything was going. But in a blink of an eye, all of that was changed. Taken away from you. Sure you were gifted with the two precious lives growing inside you, but it wasn’t the same. Their future was almost taken away from them and if it wasn’t for the team, you would have no chance at saving them from it. You knew both you and Bucky would move past this, but at what cost? He’s gone through so much and lost so much more.
“Y/N stop that, stop that right now.” Nat’s grip on your hand tightened, giving you her stern face. “You all got out alive and well. Yes, there are still challenges that need to be faced, but the most important thing is that you are here. You’re both getting the best help out there, Tony’s been working hard with Bucky every day. Same with Bruce. Bucky’s in good hands and he’s been getting good results from what Tony and Bruce have come up with. And the most important thing is that he loves you. He might not have told you this, but he wouldn’t have done this if it wasn’t for your support.” She brushed back your hair, placing a kiss and your forehead.
“So stop worrying and try to rest. I’ll go update Bucky on how you’re doing and see how his progress is.” You smiled at Nat through heavy eyes.
“Thanks, Nat, how do you always know the answers?” She smiled as she stood up from the bed.
“It’s my job, now sleep.” Your body, heavy with sleep sunk into the mattress, letting sleep take over with ease.
------------------
Bucky’s POV
I sat silently in the Hulk containment room, leaning against the wall waiting until it was time for them to finally let me out of here. Though, I doubted it would be anytime soon considering what I just did. I glanced down at my arm, trying my best not to move too fast.
‘Stupid, you stupid fucker, just found another way to hurt yourself. Way to go Barnes.’ I just had to go and put another hole in a wall and manage to screw something up. Every major move I made felt as if needles were being pricked into my skin, but not in a good way. Surprisingly, the only thing that seemed to be damaged was just some of the wires acting as nerves connected to where my shoulder ended and everything else was in perfect condition. Well, besides the pieces of rubble that happened to wedge their way between the plates. Which was not pleasant at all, in fact, it felt as if someone was rubbing sandpaper across my skin.
I can see why they made this room for Bruce. Considering that I put a few dents of my own on the door. Tony’s definitely not going to be happy about that, just another thing for him to fix. Seems as if the only thing I can do now is break things. Everything I touch either breaks or gets destroyed. How Y/N hasn’t been hurt by me yet is surprising. I want to hold her so badly, but that lingering fear of hurting her with my newly gained strength that will for surely kill her. When I heard that bitch was making Y/N uncomfortable, the chance of him harming my kids and then when I heard she used her panic bracelet? That was the last straw, I lost it and tried all I could to get to her and protect her, but due to my anger episode I was locked away in here and had no choice but to wait until Steve or somebody came to check up on me. Which hopefully would be soon, because I’ve been locked up far too much for my taste and would rather not have to be alone with my own thoughts. That was never a good thing.
Thankfully, it wasn’t much longer until the lock clicked open and Steve walked in, a few SHIELD agents stationed outside. I frowned at the lack of trust that was going on here, ‘specially from Steve. The agents were watching me with smug grins on their faces, that was something I did not appreciate. I stood up on my feet, eyes never leaving those fuckers. I looked over Steve’s shoulder and glared at them, eyeing their uniforms carefully. They had a few tasers and they all had .99 mils with extra cartridges. Their suits were pressed all neat and proper, their hair was done just right, no, it just made me want to throw up even more. But thanks to my enhanced skills, I was able to see right through their little act.
“Seriously, Stevie?” I nod towards the agents outside, “Fury must be desperate if he’s been sending newbie agents to help escort the Winter Soldier. Or does he want me to give ‘em new faces? ‘Cause that I can do.” Steve’s stern frown, curled up into a grin.
“You jerk,” he pulled me into a hug, “apparently they’re new recruits that I’m supposed to show around. Thought I’d start off here.” Steve spoke quietly for only me to hear then stepped back and gestured towards the open door. “After you, Bucky, Tony, and Bruce are ready for you I think.”
“Great, sooner I get it done, the sooner I can get back to Y/N.” I walked out of the room and just like I predicted, one of the agents spoke up.
“Uh, Captain, sir?” Steve stopped and faced the agent.
“What is it, Agent?”
“Isn’t the prisoner supposed to be restrained? He’s a high-level assassin and should be monitored while visiting a well-respected Avenger.” Steve was about to speak his mind when I decided to make my own move. I walked right up to the agent who took a step back the more I advanced towards him.
“Stand down! Stand down or I will have no choice but to use force!” The agent pointed the taser at me while the other three pointed their guns at me. However, when I made no notion of stopping, they fired their weapons. The bullets hitting my arm, my shoulder, and abdomen, while the taser connected to my left shoulder. Their faces paled when I didn’t react at all. I stopped in front of the pale man, who tried not to shake where he was standing.
“High-level assassin? I’m the one assassin you don’t want to mess with and better be careful what you say to the assassin who happens to be engaged to that said Avenger.” I looked down to the places where they shot me and easily pulled out the bullets with my fully functioning left arm, then proceeded to watch the holes heal rapidly. “I forgot to mention, this assassin also happens to be an Avenger and someone who doesn’t answer to SHIELD. So, excuse me,” I turned back to Steve who I could tell was struggling to keep himself composed. “Let’s go, Stevie.”
I started to continue down the hallway when I stopped and turned towards the same agent as before. “Oh, I should probably give this back to you,” I handed the extra clip to him, “wouldn’t want to lose that now would we?” I grinned at him as he took the clip from my hand and proceeded to check where he placed it earlier.
“Now I’m ready to see Tony and Bruce, but seriously? That was too easy.” Steve cracked then, hand landing on his chest as he laughed.
“Ok, that was good, but give ‘em some slack, it’s only their first week,” Steve replied as we made our way up to Tony’s lab, the agents following us at a safe distance.
“First week my ass, Steve, I swear the things we went through 70 years ago was more challenging than what they’re doing now.” I fell silent as I thought back to the time of the war and what I had to go through to get prepared for it.
“Bucky stop, don’t go there, it won’t make any of this better.”
“None of this makes it any better, Steve, it just takes time to fully catch up to what’s going on everywhere else.” Steve gave me a concerned side look. “If they want to work in this type of field Steve, then they need to fucking act like it.” We stop right in front of the lab. “Because cocky guys like them, get killed and are easy targets for guys like me.” I made sure that the agents heard every single word I said. Sure, they were a bunch of overconfident assholes who think that they are the best there is, but that type of behavior could be deadly. I knew Steve understood, I just hoped the agents did.
“Let me know how it goes?” He asked before I punched in the code to the door.
“Yeah, let me know how their tour goes?” I asked him as I looked behind him at the group, who quickly looked away.
“Yeah, now get in there so you can go see Y/N.” Steve pushed me towards the door then left with the group. I punched in the code to the lab and walked in.
“Frosty! Let’s get started, we’ll run some scans, fix some things and get it all cleaned up for you.” Tony remarked as they finished setting up their station.
“Sounds good Stark, sounds good.” I got settled into the chair and just let them do their thing.
Readers POV
“Ah Miss Y/N, Sergeant Barnes is a very lucky man,” Albern spoke huskily in your ear as he trailed his hand down your back, “knowing you were graced with such soft skin.” You suppressed a shudder as his hand continued to trail down over the bandage wrapped around your lower back, then down your thighs.
“It’s a shame I had to mark up the skin this way, I’d rather prefer to mark you in a much different way, my dear,” you felt his hot breath on your neck just before he sucked a good harsh bruise onto your skin.
“Omifh!” You tried to scream out, but the gag in your mouth prevented you from doing so.
“Mmm, delectable as well. When the time is right, we can enjoy our...time together, for now, however, we have some things to do first.” He turned your face around and placed a kiss on the corner of your mouth, “The more you struggle, the greater the pain will be.” He pulled away and stepped to the side into your blind spot. Nothing happened right away, but when it did, you screamed into the gag as Albern took great joy in carving a knife into the skin of your back. Every so often, he’d stop and caress your skin and whisper words into your side.
You struggled against your restraints, but they wouldn’t give. You were helpless in this situation and the only thing you could do was hope that this pain would end quickly.
“Y/N! Y/N, please, please wake up! You’re not there, you’re safe.” You jerked awake when a hand gently nudged you. You scrambled to sit up, the person beside you helped you up and swing your legs over the side so you could lean forward to catch your breath. “That’s great doll, just take deep breaths.” A warm calloused hand slid across your cheek and around your neck. You leaned into the touch until you felt your head land on a shoulder. Pushing your nose into the neck, you breathed in the familiar scent. There was only one person who smelled like mint, leather, and Bucky. Sobbing in relief, you held onto him tightly.
“B-Bucky, oh-oh god!” As you felt two strong arms wrap around you, you couldn’t hold back the tears anymore, so you let them go. Knowing that Bucky will be there to hold you up above the nightmares that were threatening to drown you.
“I got you doll, you’re safe with me. He’s gone, he can’t touch us anymore.” You pulled him tighter against you, taking shelter in his arms.
“But it feels as if he’s still here. The world feels like it’s closing in around me and I can’t see anything.” You felt him pull away from you and kiss your mouth ever so gently.
“Stay here, I’ll be back in a few minutes, alright?” He looked at you with eager eyes, so you nodded and watched him rush out of the bedroom and heard some doors open and closing. Not sure what he was actually doing, you forced yourself to sit and wait until he came back from doing whatever he was planning. A good thirty minutes passed when he finally came back wearing sweatpants, a hoodie, and thick wool socks, holding folded clothes in his hands.
He knelt in front of you, placing the clothes beside him. “You alright if I help you get changed? It’s going to be cold where we’re going.”
“Of course I’m alright with that, Bucky.” A small smile he gave you made you feel a whole lot better. So you sat patiently, letting Bucky arrange you however as he changed you into your own pair of sweatpants, hoodie and wool socks. Once you were ready, he picked you up bridal style and headed straight towards the elevator.
“JARVIS, could you bring me to the floor, please?”
“Yes, Mr. Barnes.” The elevator headed up towards the roof, what Bucky had planned you had no idea.
“Where are we going?”
“Not much of a surprise if I tell you now is it?” Bucky smiled down at you as he held you closer. So you rested your head against his shoulder and enjoyed the ride. Soon after, the elevator stopped and opened to reveal Tony’s floor. Why the hell did Bucky bring you up to Tony’s floor? Bucky walked past the living room, kitchen and bedroom until he was standing in front of another set of doors. JARVIS being the lovely AI he is opened the doors to Tony’s private balcony. Completely set up with layers of fluffy blankets, pillows, grapes, cheese, and crackers. It was lit up well enough to see what you were doing, but also to see the stars that were beginning to shine.
“Y-You remembered.” You were blown away at the site before you. Bucky settled down into the mass of pillows and blankets, situating you right between his legs so you could rest against his chest.
“‘Course I remembered, we used to watch the stars all the time before...before everything happened.” He tensed underneath you for a split second, but it quickly dissipated. “I’m sorry for all this happening to you, Y/N. None of this would’ve happened if-”
“Don’t you dare finish that sentence, James Buchanan Barnes, don’t you dare.” You did your best to twist around to face him as you scolded him. “It doesn’t matter if we were together or not. He would’ve gone after anyone if it meant he had a good chance of getting you. But like you said before, he’s gone, no longer in the picture. You got to him, gave him what he damn well deserved and watched as the whole place was blown to smithereens with him underneath it all.” You ran your hand through his hair, pushing yourself up to kiss the lips you loved so much.
“Stop focusing on the past and focus on the now and what is to come. Everything he’s done up to the point he died, is gone. All information destroyed and what was worth keeping is safely put away for good. We’re both alive, sure we have more scars to bear than most, but...we’re...alive. And we have a new future ahead of us, we’re having a family of our own to look forward to.” You smiled down at your stomach, feeling them shift around, kicking against the confines of the walls. Wanting Bucky to finally experience this moment, you pulled up the bottom of the hoodie up to under your breasts and gently grabbed his smooth black metal hand.
“It’s okay James,” his eyes shot to yours when you spoke his name, “we trust you, but they really want to meet their daddy.” With slow movements, you placed his hand directly on top of where the twins were previously kicking. As soon as his hand touched your skin, the kicking intensified, leaving you breathless as you laughed happily. Bucky, however, was motionless where he sat, his hand refusing to move. His eyes, however, were telling you exactly what he was feeling. His eyes were filled with tears as they stayed locked on his hand.
“Bucky? Bucky what is it?” You were worried this was beginning to be too much for him, but when he looked at you with the biggest grin you’ve seen since your lives changed, you felt relieved.
“I can, I can feel them.” His eyes darted between your face and his hand. “I can feel their heartbeats.”
“W-What?” You weren’t entirely sure what he just said, but when he began to move his hand around, joining it with his other one, the excitement on his face only grew.
“My hand, it’s, it’s hard to explain, but I can feel their hearts beating, Y/N.” The pair of you shared a watery smile as the kicks sadly dialed down. Bucky leaned down and littered the area with kisses, smiling when he received a small kick in return. Then pulled the hoodie back down, then proceeded to litter your face with your own set of kisses. Speaking words of love and adoration with each one.
“I love your smile” kiss “your laugh” kiss “your personality” kiss “your heart and compassion” kiss, he ran his hand around your neck and pulled you into a kiss. One that was filled with love and promise. “I love you so much Y/N, some days I don’t think I’m worth it, but I’m so glad I am.”
You ran your hand through his hair, using your free hand to bring his metal one to your mouth where you kissed each knuckle, before placing it on your face as well. You closed your eyes continently as you breathed him in, feeling protected as his presence engulfed you. This moment was perfect up until your emotions decided to shoot into overdrive. He pulled you close to him, wrapping his arms around you as he held you protectively in his lap, as you cried into his shoulder.
“What’s wrong Y/N? What can I do to help you?” He spoke soothingly to you, you just held onto him tighter, not wanting him to let you go for even a second.
“Just hold me, hold me please.”
“I got you doll, I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me whether you like it or not.”
“I’ve just missed you, missed you being around me, with me. It feels as if I can’t breathe when you’re not around me.” You finally tell him after you take a few minutes to calm down. You felt bad for telling him that, afraid that you’ll make him feel worse about himself. He just buries his face into your neck, breathing you in and touching his lips to every inch of skin he could reach.
“Y/N, the reason why I stayed off to the side is that I need to know the full extent of my own strength. I know you trust me to be around you and the twins, but I need to trust myself.” He trailed kisses up your neck and began to nibble on the patch of skin behind your ear he knew drove you wild. “And believe me doll, just having you here with me helps.”
“Alright Mr. Barnes, enough of that,” you playfully swat his face away and grab the snacks he so lovingly provided, “the little guys are hungry and there is no way in hell we are making out on this balcony.”
“Why not? I always wanted to make you hot and bothered on a balcony.” He wiggled his eyebrows at you, but you stopped him when you stuffed a few grapes in his mouth.
“In case if you forgot, we did that at Tony’s beach house remember?” Of course, you knew he remembered that day on the balcony, and the bathroom, the pool, the living room, the kitchen and the bedroom. You were pretty sure Tony had to sterilize the whole place afterward, but it was totally worth it.
“Now that was fun, maybe he’ll let us do it again.” You pecked Bucky on the lips then helped yourself to more grapes.
“Maybe, but right now I just want to cuddle with you and watch the stars with you.” Bucky wrapped a huge blanket around the both of you, food still well within reach, as you both settled in for the night of stargazing. You weren’t sure what tomorrow would bring or what the future holds for the four of you, but you were going to take this as a win. A step towards the path of healing. A step into yours and Bucky’s new future and your new life together.
Summary: Bucky bounced back to his previous head space and Jules is pissed.
Word Count: 3,250
Warnings: language, a broken nose, panic attack, touch deprived, sexual harassment slurs
A/N: I loved writing Jules in this part, defend Bucky at all costs!! So it’s in Jules POV, plus a hint of Steve’s secret love life...dun dun dun!
I saw Bucky frantically shove himself into the furthest corner of my office as Dr. Roberts and two others came storming in.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?!” I yelled at Roberts as he came up to me, checking for injuries. I shoved his hands away, needing to get to Bucky as I noticed he was having a full blown panic attack. Trying to move away from the men’s grips.
“Dr. Carlson, thank heavens! Are you alright? You’re lucky he didn’t harm you.”
“Of fucking course I’m alright and no Bucky wouldn’t hurt me, you four-eyed buffoon! Now, step aside please.” I walked passed him, only to be stopped by his hand on my arm.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t allow that. The patient is unstable, he needs to be monitored and put under heavy surveillance.” I yanked my arm out of his grip, swinging at his face full force, breaking his glasses in two. I almost felt sorry for the man as I heard the crunch of his nose breaking when I punched him, but damn did it feel good.
“His name is James and he is my patient. And the person who needs to be under surveillance is you and your puny head!” I wasted no more time on him, I needed to get to Bucky.
“If you want your fucking balls attached, then back off!” The two nurses scurried back as I crouched in front of Bucky. I gently took his hand in mine, “I’m here Bucky, I’m right here, but now you need to breathe, alright? Breath like we did earlier at the elevator….come on Bucky work with me here.” He just shook his head and began to rock back and forth, muttering under his breath when he wasn’t struggling to breathe. He was hyperventilating and fast.
“JARVIS, get Steve up here stat!” I looked over to where Dr. Roberts was getting up with the help of the nurses, blood already soaked onto his white lab coat. Glaring daggers at both me and Bucky.
“Director Fury will hear about this! That killer should be in a straight jacket and you should be stripped of your credentials!”
“Don’t mess with me Roberts and get the hell out of my office before I rip off your dick and shove it up your ass so hard it’ll come shooting out of your nose!” Steve and Tony came rushing in as I threatened him. Steve rushed over to me, where Bucky was now passed out, I quickly checked his pulse, it was high….too high. Not even a super soldier would survive this heart rate.
“What the hell happened?” Steve asked as he looked at me frantically. I turned around to Tony,
“Get that fucker out of my office or so help me I will throw him off my balcony myself!” I cut off all attention on that asshole and breathed deeply, putting my full focus back on Bucky.
“Help me get him on the stretcher Steve, we need to get him to Helen fast. We need to get his heart rate down before it fails.” Once he was on the stretcher, we rushed down to Helen, who was already informed by JARVIS of the situation. I updated her and told her to immediately contact me first when he woke up.
“Jules, what happened in there?” Steve asked, pulling me out into the hallway. Running my hands through my hair, I did my breathing exercises to calm down. No need to be yelling at Steve when nothing was his fault.
“Bucky had his first session with me today, which will stay confidential, even from you Steve,” there was a flash of hurt in his eyes, but right now I couldn’t care less, “it was going well. Remarkably well for a first session, considering he offered to hug me first.”
“Really? He initiated it first?” Steve’s brows shot up, completely shocked. I just nodded.
“Yeah, so we ended, well we were about to end the session when that son of a bitch Roberts stormed into my office like he owned the damn place, demanding that Bucky should be a confined patient labeled UNSTABLE THREAT in big red fucking letters! Who the hell does he think he is?!”
“Language.” I glared daggers at Steve.
“Oh fuck you, Steve. We all know you have the dirtiest mouth on the team, don’t you deny it.” The tips of his ears turned red as he looked away, rubbing the back of his neck.
“I guess the Brooklyn in me is coming out. I try not to.”
“Steve, believe me, no one cares that you have foul language. I think they’re more surprised of their virgin Captain America talking that way.” Steve shook his head looking at me.
“Well, I can tell you that the virgin part is not true. Why does everyone think that I’m a blushing virgin?” I cross my arms and stare at the man, suddenly curious about this new information.
“Really? Steve Rogers, the great Captain America has had sex? Pray tell.” My eyes widened as Steve’s face grew redder with embarrassment.
“Uh, well I definitely don’t need help in the girlfriend department, if that’s what you’re asking.” Girlfriend? Wait, now this is definitely news.
“Girlfriend? Steve, that’s...that’s awesome! Is it someone I know?” I leaned forward, anxious to find out who his lady friend is. But Steve was relentless, zipping his lips shut.
“Nope, can’t tell you that. I...I don’t think we’re ready for anyone to know quite yet.” I smiled at Steve.
“Well, I expect to hear details soon. You sly dog you, wait until Bucky finds out what you’ve been up too.” The mood drastically shifted when Bucky was brought up, bringing us back down to Earth and what we were actually here for. Helen stepped out of the room and closed the door softly behind her. Steve and I both walked up to her.
“How’s Bucky? Is he going to be okay?” Helen stopped Steve before he could continue.
“Right now he’s resting, sedated enough to bring his heart rate back down to normal. He’ll feel a slight discomfort when he wakes up because it did put a strain on his body. Now, I understand this was not purely done by accident?” I shook my head.
“No, he was in his first session with me and it was going well. He has a severe problem with any forms of physical contact, mainly touch. Then Dr. Roberts came in and fucked everything up.” Helen’s face dropped and not in a good way. From the look Steve gave me, he was confused as to what was going on.
“Dr. Roberts is...let’s just say he thinks when someone goes bad, they stay that way. As for Bucky’s case, he’s everything Roberts hates. Even if Bucky’s not his patient, he’ll do whatever he can to put men like him where they belong. In a straightjacket and locked away from the world.” Steve was about to speak up when JARVIS interrupted.
“Sorry to interrupt, but it seems that Director Fury has requested your presence in the conference room.” I knew Roberts wouldn’t waste any time in getting down to the dirty stuff.
“Thanks, J.” I run my hands across my face, groaning at the thought of having to deal with Roberts...again. “Time to face the music, thanks Helen for taking care of Bucky. Steve, you wanna come with? I might need some restraint when I’m up there.”
“After what I’ve just heard, I don’t think I’ll even hold you back.” A hint of his Captain America voice leaked through and by the face, he was making, it would make any SHIELD agent shiver in their shoes. Helen looked back at Bucky’s closed door.
“Go, I’ll make sure nothing happens. I’ll give JARVIS the files for Fury to see.”
“Thanks, Helen, let’s go Steve before I forget my own breathing exercises.” We headed up towards the conference room as I tried to keep my own head in check. I was damn good at my job and took it very seriously, especially when it came to my patients. They were there to seek and get help, not to be bombarded and trapped into being put into a padded room. It didn’t take us long to get there and Steve already looked like he was going to speak his mind. However, that would just make things worse, for him and for Bucky.
“Steve,” I stopped just before we walked in, “you need to let me handle this.” I stopped him before he could say anything. “I know. But he’s my patient and I’m his therapist. For you to take matters into your own hands, will give Roberts more power. Luckily for me, I can handle him and I know how to push his buttons.” I took a deep breath and squared my shoulders, ready to face the music.
Fury was at the head of the table, on his right sat Tony - thank God - with his lawyer? Huh, interesting and to his left, sat Dr. Roberts, along with the two nurses who were with him. Another man was sitting beside him, his own lawyer no doubt, good luck with that.
“Dr. Carlson, thanks for joining us. I think you already know Dr. Roberts,” I give Roberts the smuggest, yet professionalism smile I could muster.
“How’s the nose fairing you, Dr. Roberts? It looks a little crooked.” He glared at me behind his taped glasses as he thumbed the tip of the edge of his nose. I took a seat next to Tony’s lawyer, Steve sitting beside me as well.
“Now, it has come to my attention that there seems to be an issue with the form of Mr. Barnes therapy.” Fury sat down and began to look over some files, one’s from Helen and a few others. “I have spoken with Dr. Roberts about Mr. Barnes’ current condition and the safety of others who are currently residing in this building. He will be transferred to a more secure location under the supervision of Dr. Roberts.”
“Are you serious? Him?” I point to the bastard who was now smiling like he won a damn metal, “You can’t be serious Director, he’s just jealous because he wants to be the one to see Bucky be locked away.” Fury sat stone-faced, unmoving.
“However, in regards to what Helen has sent me and a brief, but yet detailed account from JARVIS, Mr. Barnes will be staying here.” Roberts smile dropped and I noticed Tony grinning from ear to ear. Before I could ask what was going on, Tony’s lawyer slid a black folder towards me along with a very fancy black pen.
“‘Doctor Jules Carlson,
Under careful consideration and a high recommendation from Stark Industries and Doctor Helen Cho, I Anthony Stark hereby place Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes under your permanent care as your patient. Until said patient decides otherwise. You will have full support and support in regards to Mr. James Barnes’ care.
In regards to SHIELD, they will have no authority or claim over the patient, unless given permission from his therapist, Dr. Carlson herself. If no agreement is given, severe consequences will take place to the offending party. In no way shape or form will Mr. Barnes be handed to a different therapist. Any and all negative actions Br. Barnes displays both on and off Stark Industries property that is both harmful for him and for to others, will be dealt with heavily between both his therapist and the employer, Mr. Anthony Stark. Where consequences will be chosen.
In regards to Doctor John Roberts, he will be removed from the Avengers Tower property and transferred to a different SHIELD sector. If he does not agree with the terms of the agreement, he will be released from his position permanently. After a thorough investigation, it has come to both Director Fury’s and my conclusion, Dr. Roberts’s actions were uncalled for and unsafe for the patient and his health. Therefore, he will be dealt with accordingly based off of his actions.
Doctor Jules Carlson, will be released from her previous position and current SHIELD employer and placed under her new employer, Mr. Anthony Stark. Her new position will be the Avengers group therapist, but her main patient and priority will be on Mr. Barnes. She will be given full compensation for any damages that were caused.
I, Anthony Stark have reviewed and agree with said terms and welcomes Doctor Jules Carlson to the Avengers Team family. If they agree with the agreement, please sign and date on the dotted line below.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Anthony Stark & Avengers welcomes you’ “I just sat there as I finished reading.
I couldn’t believe what I was reading. I had to reread it again carefully to make sure I wasn’t making any of this up. Not only was I being offered a much better job, but I was going to be working full time as the group therapist for the world’s mightiest heroes and given full reign of Bucky’s case. Which obviously meant more responsibilities for me, but it meant that the great Tony Stark was putting a great trust in me to take care of his best friends’ friend. I could not mess this up or I would be letting a lot of people down. I glanced around those around the table, Steve looked relieved, Tony stayed professional but sent Roberts a smug look. Roberts looked pissed off beyond belief, along with the two male nurses and his lawyer. Fury looked like...Fury.
“Are you out of goddamn minds?!” Roberts shouted, his chair falling over as he stood up. “She is reckless and her methods are futile. Her office is unprofessional and she flaunts herself to those who are desperately seeking attention and she will be more than happy to have them get into her pants.” He pointed at me with a disgusted look as if I was emitting an airborne contagion. “The patient is highly unstable and is a deadly threat to everyone’s safety and should be receiving shock therapy and not the therapy she’s been giving him. Clearly, it isn’t working!”
“Dr. Roberts-” Tony began to say, but Roberts yet again being the complete asshole he is, had to voice his complaints.
“This is no job for a woman, she should take care of the needs of men like she’s supposed to. They’re clearly too fragile-”
“Dr. Roberts shut the fuck up and sit the fuck down!” Roberts stared at Tony in shock, clearly not prepared for the man to yell at him. Roberts reluctantly sat down and did indeed shut up. I just sat back and watched the whole thing as it played out. It wasn’t the first time I’ve been told this. To be honest, I’ve gone through worse, been called worse, lived with worse. Steve leaned forward to check on me.
“Jules, you okay?”
“Yeah, told you I could handle him, Steve. I actually find this whole thing rather amusing. I’ve dealt with much worse, Roberts just going to get a blood clot if he doesn’t take a breath. Maybe he forgot his inhaler.” He slammed his hand against the table top.
“See?! Very unprofessional.” Tony leaned forward, glancing between Fury and Roberts.
“Dr. Roberts, can I call you Bob? I’m gonna call you Bob, of course, asshole seems like a more suitable name for you, but I’m trying to be on my best behavior. First of all, I will not have a man in my building or on my property nonetheless, insult a woman this way. Believe me, you don’t want that happening, ‘especially in front of Spangles over here.” Steve gave Roberts a cold glare. “Therefore, Jules is there anything you’d like to say?” Tony looked over to me, as did everyone else.
I looked at the document in front of me, I took the black pen signed and dated the dotted line and slid it back towards Tony’s lawyer. “Nope, thank you Mr. Stark for this wonderful opportunity. I can’t wait to work with you and the rest of the Avengers.” I turned to Steve, “I am grateful for your support in this also. I assure you, Bucky is in good hands.”
“Attention whore.” Roberts scoffed under his breath. That got the attention of Fury and Tony, they were about to step in, but I did before they could.
“Call me all you want Robert's, believe me, I heard it all.” I looked to Fury. “Am I allowed to go off the record here sir?” Fury nodded and sat back, clearly wanting to see how this went. I focused back on Roberts again.
“Yes, I was a whore, slut, skank and tried pretty much everything I could to get men into my pants. It was easy money, but what is a girl to do when their own pathetic excuse of a father disowns them and kicks them out of the house with just the clothes on their backs? So I did what I could to survive, made a friend who helped me get back on my feet. Got a job, made a living for myself, went to school, worked my ass off and here I am.
But I think the only person in this room who’s an ‘attention whore’ as you like to call it, is you. You’re probably compensating for something anyways if you’re so desperate to have someone jack you off so you can release some tension. Don’t worry though Roberts, the older you get the more difficult it is to ‘rise’ to the occasion. Good thing there’s pills for that type of thing. And Bucky is more of a man than you ever were or will be. You wouldn’t survive an hour of what he’s been through even if you tried. Now,” I looked between Fury and Tony, feeling lighter about the situation at Tony’s amused face, “this has been fun, but I really have to be going and check on my patient.” Fury stood up and shook my hand.
“Welcome to the family Dr. Carlson, the team are lucky to have you. Let me know if you have any further questions or concerns.” I nod in thanks, then turned to Tony shaking his hand as well.
“Gotta say Jules that was some stuff. Your own personal floor should be completed first thing tomorrow morning, ready for you to move in. While the floor where your office is located will be turned into your therapy floor fit for everyone’s needs and such. Bucky will be staying on the same floor as Steve, but we can talk more about that later. Welcome to the team, but please call me Tony.” I’m pretty sure you’d have to scrape my jaw off the floor. I didn’t think it was necessary for me to basically have two floors, but if that’s what Tony wanted, then I wasn’t going to complain.
“Thank you, Tony, I’m glad to be a part of the team.” I shook his lawyers offered hand and made my way towards the door, but looked at Roberts one last time, who was trying so hard to keep himself in check. “Oh and Dr. Roberts, I can give you a prescription to help you ‘lift’ up your issue if you’d like.” I left the conference room before he could fully react, but I knew he didn’t take it very well when I could hear Tony snorting just as the door closed.
Summary: What Albern wants Bucky to do, is definitely not easy. No matter he decides to do, everyone will be hurt in the process.
Word Count: 2,733
Warnings: Language, character injury, depression, angst, manipulation, there’s no rape but Albern makes unwanted touches, unconscious reader
A/N: Bucky’s POV. First of all, sorry if my translations are crappy. And yes I’m evil and apparently enjoy causing everyone large amounts of pain. This part was tough for me to write and the next one isn’t going to be easy either. But let me know what you think! What do you think Bucky’s going to do?
If there are any mistakes, I’m sorry.
The days were piling up on top of one another. I tried to get back into the groove of things, but all those activities included Y/N. She was fucking everywhere. Where I slept, ate, even when I was taking a fucking shower, I could hear her singing in the bathroom. I could feel myself slipping out of my own body and sinking back into the darkness I once knew. Blocking out everything around me and just letting them drag me into the chair.
I watched as the straps were locked into place, my chest began to heave as the headset fell forward, clamping itself around my face. Electrical shocks few through my head, down the length of my body. I couldn't do anything but scream and convulse in the chair. Figures began to fade in and out, crowding around me. Stalking me as if I was their prey. They lashed out at me with bloody faces, missing limbs, crushed bodies, oh god, bodies everywhere. Laughing at me, taking control of the switches on the dashboard, hiking up the pain level.
Everyone I’ve killed and murdered were all laughing at me, pointing at me. I tried to break free, but strong hands only held me down. Blurred faces shouting at me, ignoring my pleas and cries for them to stop. A strong fist came down on my face, causing me to jerk awake and shove away the figures from me. I managed to land a right hook of my own.
“Fuck!”
“Holy shit, man! You okay?”
“Steve, that’s most definitely broken.”
“Don’t care, Buck? Bucky? Focus, just focus on my voice. You’re in the tower, HYDRA doesn’t have you, you’re fine.” Eventually, the room came into focus. I was on the floor, breathing heavily on my back, shaking. I slowly lifted my hand, the knuckles were severely bruised and bleeding. Blood. Red. I slammed my hand back down, not wanting to look at all the blood.
“I have to look at his hand, Steve, it looks pretty bad.”
“Not yet, he’s still stuck. You go over there now and he’ll do something he’ll regret.”
“Shut up! He’s talking!”
“What language is that?”
“Russian, some German. He keeps saying he’s sorry, that he can’t. Steve, he’s telling them to stop.”
“Stop what? Nat, telling them to stop what?”
“To stop hurting him.” I kept seeing all the faces of the families I tore apart, watching the life leave their eyes. They kept asking me why I was hurting them. I told them I was sorry. That I never wanted any of this. They cried out as I put a bullet in their head, a knife through their gut. I fell to my knees, crying, screaming at them I was so sorry, but that I had to or they were going to hurt me.
“Fuck, I’m going to regret this.”
“Tony, what-” Next thing I knew a loud shot fired beside me, it was about to fire again when I grabbed the source with my left hand and squeezed.
“FRIDAY, do it, lowest setting please.”
I jerked up when a shock of electricity flew up my arm, releasing my hold on it. I blinked rapidly, my head hurt, my hand hurt, even my fucking eyes hurt. What the hell? I rubbed at my eyes, groaning as I moved my right hand.
“Hey, it worked! Welcome back, Frosty.” Tony? What? I blink up at the man beside me, his gauntlet was on his hand with dents the shapes of fingers. I turned my head and there was a good sized hole a few inches from my face. When did that get there? Did I put that there? No, I couldn’t have, it was smoking. Then it clicked.
“D-Did you just fire at me with that thing?” Tony smiled.
“Yup. Bruce, I think you can look at his hand now.” Bruce? What? The doctor came up and knelt beside me.
“Let’s sit you up. Slowly though.” He helped me lean against the wall as he gently grabbed my right hand. I cringed, it didn’t look too good. What did I hit?
“Still got a mean right hook. You sure you made the right choice of not taken’ up boxing’?” I glance over at Steve who was giving me a bloody toothy grin. His nose was broken, already put back into place, but he looked completely unfazed by it.
Bruce spoke up as he finished wrapping my hand. “The swelling and bruising should go down in a few days. A couple broken fingers, but you’ll heal up fast.”
“Thanks, Bruce,” Steve said, as the doctor stood up and stood by the others.
“What the hell happened? Why are you guys in my room?” Everything came into focus now. I was sitting on the floor, still partly tangled in my sheets. Tony’s gauntlet was now resting off to the side and basically, everyone was standing in my bedroom still clad in their pajamas.
“Well first of all Frosty, you were screaming. FRIDAY informed us saying that you were in distress and she couldn’t get through to you. Then you punched Steve, mumbling in Russian, I shot you, FRIDAY shocked you, and here we are.” Tony explained, getting comfortable on the couch off to the side. Clint and Nat sat down beside him, while everyone stood.
“Bucky,” Steve moved to sit beside me, “you were saying you were sorry. What were you talking about?” I inwardly flinched.
“I don’t want to talk about it, Steve. It’s just,” I sigh, just really wanting this whole other nightmare to end, “everything the other guy did. This whole,” I gesture around the room, “thing. The fucking HYDRA asshole situation isn’t helping.”
The room fell silent, everyone quiet, thinking about their lost team member. “We’ve got no new leads, Steve. It’s been days and nothing. I can’t sit around like this every day. It’s like a fucking cat and mouse game.” No one spoke a word until Steve stood up.
“Well, let's go over everything again. Look further into (brother’s name) plan and history. We’ll order in and just keep looking. But you,” Steve pointed at me, “need to at least get some rest. I don’t care what you say if you want to bash that fuckers face in, then ya gonna need to get your strength up. If that bitch is gonna die, I want him to fucking feel it first.” Everyone gawked at Steve.
I just laughed, standing up and gripped his shoulder. “You’re Brooklyn’s showing, punk. I don’t think the others are ready for that yet.” Tony was the first to speak up.
“Who the hell are you and what have you done with Steve!?!” Everyone laughed.
“Holy shit Cap, you’ve been holding out on us.” Clint laughed, Nat’s face stayed the same, but a hint of amusement clearly filled her eyes. Steve just shook his head.
“Let’s get to work.”
Everyone eagerly agreed, the food was ordered for the team and everyone got set up in the common room, hoping that something would pop up. Anything.
------------------
It was another two days until a new piece of information came through. Tony was busy with FRIDAY down in the lab going through the tech they pulled from Friedrich’s lab when one of the monitors began to blink. It didn’t take long until Tony had everyone down in the lab, standing in front of the piece of technology, one that was pretty much rubble at this point. FRIDAY hooked it up to the big screen and a room came into focus, then a figure walked in. I stood stalk still. Radiating off pure hate, arm calibrating and calibrating like nuts when I saw those beady little eyes make their way across the room and land on me.
“Ah, we finally meet, at last, Sergeant Barnes. I now understand why my brother and Dr. Zola took great interest in you.” His hands clasped behind his back, a grin happily plastered on his face. “And I see the rest of the great Avengers are with you as well. So it makes my job a little easier.”
“So what, no introductions? Rude.” Tony snarked from the side.
“No introductions are necessary, Tony Stark. I am well aware you already know who I am. Considering the amount of work you have done so far.”
“Как вы узнали Золу? Как узнал твой брат?” (How do you know Zola? How did your brother know?) I knew he was loving the attention and waiting for me to snap. FRIDAY translated for the rest of the team, but I didn’t care. I needed answers.
“Он работал в Red Skull, и мы очень много восхищались его работой много лет.” (He worked for Red Skull, and we very much admired his work for many years.)
“What does it have to do with, Y/N? Where is she, Albern?” Albern just casually crossed his legs and completely relaxed on the chair. Knowing full well he had control of this situation and rubbing it into my face.
“Ah Sergeant Barnes, Y/N has been such a willing and most patient participant for me. She is strong and will do very well for my plans.” I took a quite relieved breath, she was alive, that’s what mattered. That she was alive.
“Where is she?”
“Demanding, I like it. So different from when you submitted to Dr. Zola, Rumlow, and Mr. Pierce so beautifully.” His grin widened. “Yes, I know all about that. All of us know about that. Although it was nice at the beginning, we decided it was the perfect time to act.” Albern was staring directly at me. I felt as if I couldn't breathe, as all the pieces came together.
Steve must’ve noticed my reaction because he was at my side in seconds flat. “Bucky? What does he mean by that?”
“He knew.”
“What?”
“This whole time, he knew. When I proposed to her on the roof. At Tony’s. He knew! How could I not have known, Steve?! He had eyes on me this whole fucking time!” Everyone else was a mix of emotions, anger, devastation and frustration.
“Я собираюсь убить тебя, когда я возьму тебя за руки!” (I’m going to kill you when I get my hands on you!) I struggled against Tony and Steve as they held me back. All I wanted to do was reach into the screen and snap his neck and feel the life leave his body. Albern amused by the situation, but the aura he gave off made me feel sick.
Like a predator stalking his prey, he leaned forward, eyes never leaving mine. As a dark, slow smile made its way onto his face. “There he is. Now we’re ready to talk.” Without looking away, the sound of a door opened and a gurney was wheeled in as he stood up. There was a form on the gurney, in a thin hospital gown. Their face was turned away, but I wished it wouldn’t be here, but I also knew it was.
Albern, still not tearing his eyes from mine, leaned down and kissed her temple. How dare he touch her!
“Don’t you touch her you piece of shit!” Thor held my arm back when I yanked it out of Steve’s grip.
“What did you do to Y/N?” Steve asked Albern, telling me silently to stand down and keep it together. I stopped struggling but kept my eyes on the beady-eyed bitch.
“Dear Y/N is asleep and her life depends on Sergeant Barnes’ decision. So I suggest you pay close attention.” It took everything I hate to not lash out as Albern ran his hand through her hair. “Now, you have only two options and I hope that you choose wisely.” I gave him a curt nod, giving him the go ahead to tell me what my options were.
“I want the Winter Soldier back, but I also would like to continue my work. So what you need to decide, Sergeant Barnes is this; you come back and rejoin us as the Winter Soldier. Y/N would walk free, well not so much as walk, but she would leave with her life still intact. But not until she gives me a child. When she does, then she’s free to go. No questions asked.”
“And my second choice?” I hissed at him through my teeth.
“Or,” everyone, including Nat cringed sickly as Albern dragged his hand down the length of Y/N’s unconscious form and stop just below her navel. “I still continue my work, with Y/N by my side and, what do you Americans say? Ah yes,” he kissed the spot where his hand was, then put his hand back, “expand the family business. She will provide my children, giving me what I need to in order to continue my work and pertain to my every need. While you would train them as the new generation of super soldiers.” Albern kissed the bandage on Y/N’s left hand, where her ring finger should’ve been and watched as Y/N was wheeled back out of the room. Gracefully, he sat back down in the chair and looked back at me.
“Choose wisely, Sergeant Barnes. You have 24 hours to decide. I will contact you.” Then the computer switched off and burst into flames, cutting off any and all connection Tony and FRIDAY attached to it.
“FRIDAY, status?” Tony asked the A.I. after he put out the flames.
“I’m sorry Boss, but he made sure to cut off any connections to his location. I was unable to retrieve anything else.”
“Thank you, FRIDAY.” I felt my world come crashing down, except now at full force. My shoulders fell with the width of what I had to choose. Both options were bad for both parties, no matter what one I ended up choosing. Going back as the Winter Soldier was bad. That meant I would have to go through everything all over again, tenfold from what I went through before. Having to forget Y/N and everything we’ve been thorough. Would be forgotten as well.
But the thought of Albern forcing Y/N to have his offspring and stuck there for the rest of her life, while I could do nothing or remember nothing. And I would be training the next generation of soldiers. Training them to kill, express and feel no emotions. Then it dawned on me.
Y/N would be watching me do this, but not as me, but the brainwashed, deadly HYDRA assassin, the Winter Soldier. She would be watching her former lover, training her children. Punishing them when they disobeyed a direct order. Watching me turn them into cold and heartless killers.
I had to make a choice, a choice where I only had 24 hours to do so. No one should have to make this choice. No one should have to go through this. I had no idea what to do. I had no other option, no backdoor, no plan B. Sooner or later I would need to make a decision. What would the others think of me when I made my choice? What would Y/N think of me?
There was no way out of this, we were both going to be scarred and hurt by whatever option either way. No matter what option I chose, both parties would be severely hurt. I could tell the others were watching me intently, as I swayed where I stood and sunk onto the couch behind me.
Staring at the now charred computer, as my vision began to blur. My shoulders shook as I took shallow, shaky breaths, voice ragged and uneven.
“What do I do, Steve?” I looked over at my best friend, who looked just as lost as I was. “What the hell do I do?” The others watched as Steve’s shoulders dropped, watching as Steve sat down beside me, voice barely reaching my ears.
And I'm on mobile, so nothing works, but I'll try my best! 1. My mum/da? Geoff Ramsay! Wow, that's a good one! It'd be awesome to have the Achievement Hunters as my family! 2. My grandma/grandpa? Jack Patillo! Oh man, I'd die of happiness 3. My sibling? Arthur Pendragon! Ok, that's gonna be awkward, considering I really want to make-out 4. Haunts me? Castiel! I mean, those eyes! 5. My boyfriend/girlfriend? Morgana (Merlin)! Listen, I'm not going to complain. Babe has magic? I'm in! 6. My ex? Oliver Queen! Wouldn't be surprised, tbh. I think we'd have fun but then I'd be worried about him and all stressed 7. My best friend? Gabriel! Like, just by virtue of being able to summon chocolate/candy in an instant, I'd make sure I'm near when he's around 8. Proposed to you? Eggsy Unwin! Honestly I can only think of this happening on a mission or something? Like we need a distraction, and so he gets down on one knee and grabs his signet ring, which is waaay too big, and I have to act all teary and stuff. Idk 9. Your boss? John Winchester! Thats a tough job, especially when your boss has distractingly handsome features 10. Random person you met at the bar? Ray Narveaz Jr! Seriously, what I wouldn't give! 11. Your rival? Dean Winchester! Oh, I'm screwed, theres no competition. I'd rather look up lore in the bunker. 12. Gave you your 1st kiss? Felicity Smoak! Really? Why do I strike out with all the amazing women? 13. Drunk and singing Karaoke with? Sam Winchester! Ok, if I was drunk, I would probs be on the floor laughing so hard just cause Sam's gonna sing 14. Played 7 min in heaven with? Natasha Romanova! And here I was, hoping I didn't have to tag nsfw content! 15. Gave you your fave dessert? Harry Hart! Now I can't stop thinking about a cute, bespoke-suited Harry on my birthday giving me a simple candy bar, like "I didn't know what else to get you, & somehow you always have one of these on hand"
