My mum is from the north of Germany and my family on that side has upheld the North sea tradition of giving girls in their family a pendant of a fish ("Backfisch") when they get their first period. It is usually the same pendant passed down for generations. I say "usually", because my omi's flat got broken into, and the original was stolen amongst other possessions that were in her safe. This is hilarious once you realise that I am transgender. If you want to get specific, genderfluid and transmasc, and have been using he/him pronouns for the latter part of a decade. So the idea of a symbol of womanhood slipping away from me was a beautiful cosmic joke. I came out to my mum at this point, and my Omi was quite confused why she could hear laughing on the other side of the phone upon delivering the news to my mum.
Nonetheless, my Omi was delighted when find me a replacement whilst window-shopping with her friend on holiday in Sicily. I was also delighted, as it was one with a hilariously masc design. I wore it with pride, it was my favourite possession and I wore it with everything. I could not be seen without it. It got lost. I bawled like a newborn when I realised, and I never cry.
I then saw a pocket knife with a fish motif and considered that my new Backfisch. It fell apart in two.
I then got a Multi-Tool which I attached to my keychain, and have been wearing for two years. Well, had. I just realised I lost it yesterday.
I have purchased some replacements, which I am eagerly awaiting to arrive by mail. I am as agnostic as they come, but I cannot decide if this is the universe either being gender affirming in the cruelest way, or transphobic in the funniest.
