#becoming again

[oncce-againn]

Enjoy being while becoming

[theweightofdivinity]

𝘚𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘥𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 -

𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘦,

𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘣𝘪𝘳𝘵𝘩, 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘩.

[cynomin95]

3 a.m. thoughts

I’m wondering if I’ve become everything I never wanted to be.

I moved to grow. I moved to heal. I moved to become who I believed I could be.

Yet I find myself playing small—my aspirations pushed to the back burner because the first attempt humbled me.

Now I’m questioning who I thought I was and who I still believe I can be. I don’t want to be who I am right now, but I’m unsure whether I’ll ever live up to the woman I want to become.

This past year, my morals were tested—and I bent. I once held myself on such a high moral ground; now I look at myself and see a hypocrite. I’m disgusted by my actions and decisions, yet too cowardly to right my wrongs because I want my cake and to eat it too.

Now I’m in a situation that is testing me again. It feels too late to turn back, and I’m in over my head.

Will I disappoint myself again?

[tongue-tiedprose]

renewal

i have never known myself quite as well as when i was with you — the most beautiful parts of me i had tucked away, realizing only i saw their beauty. when you came into my life, my favorite parts of me again became my favorite parts. i did not have to cut off edges of myself to fit into your puzzle. i simply was, and after i was, i wasn’t sure if could turn myself into a puzzle piece again.