I see posts about "sneaky"-god Gale, and I see those posts about whether he was groomed or not, and whether Mystra is evil incarnate, and I think: that's not the story. The story is presented by the game - by Gale's actions, by his narration (Hint: unreliable narrator) of his past, by his interactions with other characters (romanced or not), and by what we're shown of Mystra (which isn't a lot). Not what some letter at the (one possible) end says, or what 'lore' says about...a wide variety of things.
First thing: Mystra is a messily written, terrible character. That she is a goddess makes it worse. There is a power imbalance between she and her Chosen, whether they are lovers or not. Ao's "don't get involved" doesn't apply to her; she is always involved. She is as spiteful and capricious as any Greek god in mythology. Think Zeus and Leto, or Zeus and...Lover of the Week. She's not actually that smart - despite the intelligence of her wizards, nor is she wise, nor omniscient/omnipotent - despite what both Elminster and Gale tell you. If you let him explode at the end of Act 2, a small army of mind-flayers is unleashed...which: either she knows and doesn't care, or she doesn't know. (I tend towards the latter, not the former; despite her leaving Gale in a very large city with a very large bomb for a year. And yes, she had agency there: as a goddess, she had more agency than Gale. You cannot argue it's all his fault and ignore her deity aspect. It's...reductive of her role in FR lore.)
Second thing: most people are unreliable narrators in their own lives. Gale is no exception; and neither is Mystra. The truth falls between the lines given as well as the actions shown in the game.
However, we don't meet Mystra first, we meet Gale of Waterdeep: a verbose, somewhat awkward wizard who 'got stuck in his own portal' - to paraphrase Astarion. Everything about him is...awkward. He's a guy who talks a lot (too much), and thinks very highly of himself and his magic. His...loquaciousness is a massive negative - because he is, as any teacher could tell you, That Guy™ - the one who always knows the answer. Everyone has met That Guy™ in some class. That Guy™ banks on his intelligence as the reason for acceptance.
Gale can get away with this: he is an attractive man with an intense personality. When he focuses, he's focused on you. He is also the real deal when it comes to intelligence and, in this case, magic. So it's not all bullshit.
So hot, but dorky - that's who we meet - along with a few flashes of pettiness (his comment in Withers tomb about the loot not being for just the player's pockets, comes to mind).
Except he's now travelling with a bunch of people who are not magically, or intellectually, oriented, and could give two shits about who he is, or was, or whatever. He is Anthony Michael Hall from The Breakfast Club, and that's how they treat him. More or less.
So Gale flounders - a lot - and you think: you were an archmage? A Chosen? Really? Really, really?
Then...there's this thing. An...orb, shall we call it? It can explode and kill everyone within the radius of a large city. Also, he has to...feed it with magical items. I mean the player's responses here are peak: From "Uh...I'm going to need a little more information..." to "You have to consume raw magic? What?!" to "I'm not wasting money on that." The man could have told you he had to consume live babies, with almost the same responses.
Except there are glimmerings of a kind man. Someone, who despite being up his own ass about his magical abilities and intelligence, doesn't actually look down on the others. He shows...empathy for Astarion, both before you know about the orb and after. He's curious about Lae'zel and her people and culture. He shares some...trepidation about his goddess in a parallel to Shadowheart. He likes Karlach, and he's not condescending. He treats Wyll like a little brother, and Halsin like a respected colleague. He has a soft spot for the tiefling children, Scratch, the Owlbear Cub, and a dislike for killing just for killing's sake. What we see is the boy who as crying because he accidentally destroyed something pretty. There's a gentleness here, a kindness.
So Gale isn't just That Guy™, he's also a good guy - not a Nice Guy, but a descent man.
As you discover, you meet Gale at his lowest point: he's been self-isolated for a year or more, exiled from the graces of his goddess. The lover thing is a side-note. (no matter what anyone thinks about her) Mystra is his goddess and she's cast him aside. He went from being at the pinnacle of his life to being cast down into the depths. He believes no one likes him, or loves him, no one will accept him because he's a failure. Not because he's actually eating live babies or stabbing puppies and kittens, but because, as he says, he is the villain. He went against the dictates of his goddess. He sought something (which she dangled before him), and having obtained it, used it without understanding what it was.
That was his ambition, his pride. To be on equal footing with Mystra. Azuth had done it, why not Gale of Waterdeep?
Only it nearly killed him, and continues to try; and part of him thinks he deserves it, and the other part thinks he doesn't.
Then tadpoles and portals.
Enter this disparate, dysfunctional group of idiots. And yeah, Gale's That Guy and a good guy, but he's also a nerd, and he's our nerd. Only it also turns out that he's very powerful, despite everything. So he's our useful nerd...who consumes magical objects; and we don't hold that against him. Mostly.
Once Gale realizes that these people like him - or tolerate him - that's when the ambition returns. Romanced or not, that's when we begin to see the Gale that got himself into trouble the first time around. The one who has an explosive orb in his chest because he wanted to be a god. He's still That Guy and the good man, but...his prideful ambitious side really begins showing. I mean, he was drooling at the Crown when you first see it. It would be, in my mind, a serious pause in the mind of Tav/Durge - especially one who is romancing Gale. Because now they've met him: That Gale who has an Explosive Orb in his chest because of his ambition. This was definitely a "I need a squirt bottle for Gale" moment.
He's regained his confidence, he's no longer suicidal. Congrats. Now you have a man of limitless ambition, and who is smart enough to manipulate you, and others, to get what he wants. (The parallel between he and Raphael is a circle, or a straight line, or however you want to put that.) Anyone who sees Gale as other than this - especially in Act 3 - isn't paying attention. Except he's also still all those other things: That Guy, the good man, the lover, the ambitious asshole. He can be all of the above - which is why this debate goes on, and on, and on.
Was it an unbalanced relationship, power wise? Yes.
Was Gale the villain? Also, no. He did what anyone with pride and ambition would - went after what he wanted. Most of the time, I try not to draw parallels between BG3 and DA, but here you see it: Pride and Wisdom. He is wise - and very proud of it. It's his pride that gets him in trouble. It's his pride in his magic, his intellect because that's all his worth, as he's been told (by Elminster, by other wizards, by Mystra) his entire life. Gale's value, his Pride, is always in his abilities, his magic. His Pride leads him "to try and to fail." And, in Act 3, he'll do it again. unless he has someone tell him: no, you're worth more than magic.
Was Mystra evil? No. A bit stupid about how someone with Gale's ego would respond to being shown everything and told to 'be contented,' but not evil.
If you're going to believe that Mystra is omniscient, then she knew that orb/netherese weave existed, and she knew someone would find it. And she left it to be found. (The Crown also escaped her grasp.) When we finally meet her in Act 3, she's very petty, and a bit schoolmarm-ish - none of which make her evil. (I've seen all the iterations of that conversation; she is very full of herself.) At best, she warned him and he ignored her, and she didn't follow up. At worst, she did the equivalent of telling her toddler not to touch the hot stove, then watching as they did so, only then to smack them upside the head for 'disobeying.'
However, that Crown and the Weave/orb were her responsibility, from when Karsus destroyed his empire to the time of the game. She wants to be the aggrieved when in reality she's the one who got caught not doing her job. (Gale tells you that "Fae'run overflows with magical items," probably because he knows where many of them are.)
(Anyone arguing about her 'death' and the Second Sundering is trying to fit a square peg in a round hole. There's a lot of fast and loose in BG3 that doesn't gel with the FR lore, unless you take off your glasses and squint. I mean, the game makes all the gods look like sad-sacks - except Withers, and he's just tired, disapproving Jergal-dad come to 'clean up this mess.' Again.)
So, after all this: Mystra did not groom him. Did she use him? Yes. But she does that with all her Chosen. ALL of them.
Did Gale's prideful ambition get the best of him? Yes.
Given his arc, is it a surprise given the right, or wrong, circumstances that he dumps you to be a god?
