your most recent fic has me rolling over this TFA concept where like. OP thinks of himself as very plain and unremarkable (even though we, the audience, have eyes and can clearly see he’s hotter than 90% of cybertron’s population) whereas Meg takes one look at him and is like “you look like a fucking blow-up doll. what the fuck. I’m almost offended the autobots would devise such a blatant attempt to seduce me”
AAA thank you so much for reading and enjoying Megatron's Espionage Kink!! I know it's a theory/hc that relies on either 1) oppy not knowing what a mirror is 2) autobots having diabolical standards of conventional attractiveness, but I love the idea of oppy just. not knowing he's a complete and total bombshell. he's basically identical to any other normal Autobot that rolled off the assembly line, sure even fellow autobots joke about his lips a lot, but they're just fucking around and teasing him surely!
But megatron has Optics and he uses them to fully drink in this visage of pure seduction that would only be written about in the most indulgent filthy smutpads, look at his WAIST?! THOSE LEGS?! HIS PLUSH LIPS MADE FOR ORAL?? and though megatron usually jeers at the bright and clashing colors of autobots, he's got to admit the red and blue and silver (and that sinful yellow on his pelvic plating/helm/etc). (I just looked at a pic of cybertronian oppy again and like HIS HIPS HAVE HANDLES??? I've seen amazing posts about TFA meg assuming he stumbled onto a bang bus when he crashed the autobot ship, cause of how sexy the autobots on board are, and this is exactly what makes it so believable)
But like I was saying I really do love meg assuming oppy Was Made To Distract/Placate Him because how else could a bot perfectly to his tastes be travelling around the galaxy? If he wasn't sent to seduce megatron, this walking talking (and fighting, those sleazy autobots really put effort into making this bot appeal) blowup doll would be in the most elite brothel on cybertron.
And I think "canon" tfa meg is too busy trying to retake cybertron and destroy the autobots to stop his evildoing to play with an Autobot, even if they are the hottest bot he's ever laid eyes upon, but I love to imagine that "what if?" what if meg Did pull out the stops to launch a counter-assault (seduce oppy and fuck him stupid).
(bonus semi-relevant shitpost copy pasted from my tf doc under the cut)




















