So I’m 90% certain Ursula Vernon managed to sneak a metaphor for sexual consent into Castle Hangnail, the children’s fantasy book. If it wasn’t on purpose, it’s still a really really good metaphor...
So the moles want some of protagonist Molly’s magic for their Mole Thing That They Do. Molly isn’t quite sure how to do this - she’s given magic away before, to Fellow Hometown Witch who reads as everyone’s childhood bully-who-convinced-you-this-is-friendship, but it was always Fellow Hometown Witch who performed the spell. Molly goes looking in the library for books on how to perform the spell:
The Little Gray Book had a page about it, near the back. It said: “This can be dangerous, but sometimes it’s necessary. You have to trust the other person won’t take all your magic and leave you empty. If you absolutely must lend your power to another, look to the place under your breastbone where magic lives, and picture a silver cord running from it to the other person. And think, as firmly as you can, Yes.”
[...] once you were done giving your power away, you pictured the cord again and thought No. And if at any time you thought that the person on the other end was taking too much power, you should think No! immediately...”
Reading this makes Molly realize that Fellow Hometown Witch, by just grabbing and taking, was doing it wrong. And when the ritual happens...
And suddenly it was easy. He’d asked. He’d asked, and she could say No, and that meant she could also say -
Middle School Monday: Castle Hangnail by Ursula Vernon
Castle Hangnail has a vacancy for a new master, and Molly thinks that she could be just the wicked witch for the job. The trouble is that Molly didn’t receive the invitation, so in order to become the new master, she has to pretend to be someone else. Another problem is that Molly is a friendly and polite little girl who doesn’t look like a witch and doesn’t seem very wicked at all. But she is determined to to win over the minions who live and work in the castle. And she’s determined to complete the tasks from the Board of Magic.
Is it possible that the castle and its minions need Molly as much as Molly needs the castle?
Give this book to older kids and younger teens who enjoy sweet, heartfelt, and funny fantasy stories!
I really wanted to draw a cute witch today, so of course I went with the delightful Molly from Castle Hangnail by Ursula Vernon ( @tkingfisher ), searching for the perfect plant for her next spell.
Hey, everyone! This is my podcast review of Castle Hangnail by Ursula Vernon. It's one of my favorite little witchy books, it's so good and I love it.
This is an audio broadcast only, so that peeps can listen and do other things at the same time. Hope you enjoy and let me know what you think. :)
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[Image: The cover of the book ‘Castle Hangnail’ by Ursula Vernon. The detailed description is kind of long so I put it under ‘read more’]
Full review is under ‘read more’, but here is it in short: Castle Hangnail is a very cute book with likeable characters, and even some pretty serious moments. However, the plot is completely unfocused and it has a climax that was incredibly predictable. Still, as an easy read, this will do more than fine.
[Full Image Description: A book cover that mostly uses blue, purple, and black as a color palette. In the foreground, a small, twelve-year-old, white girl with a round-ish face, black curly hair and black clothes is holding a book open. White light is curling from that book. A bat is perched upon her shoulder. To her left, you have an Igor-ish monster looking concerned and a cloth doll with pins sticking out from him holding a bowl with a goldfish in it. On her right, you have a creature that appears to be the cross between a donkey and a dragon. All creatures look friendly. They are standing on a winding path leading up towards an ominous castle in the background. Above them, a golden title reads ‘Castle Hangnail’.]
Author: Ursula Vernon
Genre: Fantasy
Intended Age-range: 9 to 12 (rough estimate)
Representation for POC: None
Representation for LGBT+: None
Representation for Disabilities: None
Well-Written Female Characters: Yes; the majority of the human cast is female and kicks ass, and the non-human female cast also kicks ass.
Warnings: Has a character arc that contains working through emotional abuse and (something akin to) gaslighting (not by the family or by a significant other, and it isn’t explicitely called that, but it’s definitely that. From what I can tell, it was handled decently).
Other Things: The main villain of the series has an ice-theme, and therefore also has a very pale skin, white-blonde hair and ice-blue eyes. If you happen to have albinism, this could potentionally turn you off (as it kinda plays into the ‘Evil Albino’ Trope), though the villain doesn’t actually have albinism as far as I know.
Overall Grade: 7/10
Because the Board of Magic is threatening to shut down Castle Hangnail if it doesn’t find a Master soon, the Minions living in the castle sent out invitations to all Wicked Witches, Evil Sorceresses, Vampire Lords and other magical folk to become their Master. The only one who answers the invitations is Molly, an unimpressive twelve-year old who claims to be a powerful Wicked Witch named Eudaimonia. In reality, she is a ‘moderately talented’ untrained magic user who just wants to get away from her pink-and-sparkles loving twin. Now, she needs to fulfill the Tasks the Board has laid upon her, all the while keeping her real identity secret.
Or at least, that’s the plot during the first half of the story.
This book has a lot going for it, and I am going to start with the positive. The first thing that jumps out is the wacky world it’s based in. Like all good childeren’s fantasy books, Castle Hangnail thrives upon the pure imagination of the writer. Vernon manages to use all tired old fantasy tropes (the wicked witch, for example) in a new and fresh setting, by simply adressing them in-universe. Wicked Witch, Evil Sorceress, etc. are real titles in the book, and magic users can claim them. What’s smart about this is that it creates a unique atmoshpere without having to explain too much; we already know what a Wicked Witch is, but the fact that it’s now more or less an official job is what makes it funny.
The world of Castle Hangnail is insanely entertaining and even cleverly self-aware, as can be seen through the little tidbits of information sprinkled between the pages. It never over-explains anything, but from time to time, it adds things like “Pins, the walking, talking ragdoll, wasn’t made by Voodoo, which is actually a very interesting religion. Nobody knew where he came from”, and then proceeds to tell us increasingly ludicrous things about him that never explain where he camef rom, but give your imagination a shot of adrinaline to figure it out yourself. It’s just a lot of fun.
What’s also a lot of fun are the characters. Castle Hangnail provides us with a full cast of wacky characters, ranging from Majordomo, the oldest and most serious staff member and who looks back fondly on the Mad Scientist who let a hamster eat his (Majordomo’s) brain, to Serenissima, a half-human half-Djin part-mermaid smoke spirit who is about as melodramatic as me, to Cook, a minotaur who cooks deliciously, has cooked one of her past husbands, and hates the letter Q.
Molly herself, our main character, is also very likeable. She is the ‘bad twin’; her sister being the good twin that she despises (in a very sisterly ‘nobody but me gets to call her stupid’ kinda way), and is an aspiring Wicked Witch. Molly is very self-conscious, but also determined to become better at magic and to work hard for Castle Hangnail and her friends. Her hardworking nature and stubbornness are what keeps the plot moving, helped along by the occassional plot-related coincidence. She is earnest, nice, enthousiastic about everything, and I love her. I. Love. Her. Openly admitting my biases here.
So, to summarize: a wacky world and wacky characters, with a very likable main character to boot. What’s not to like?
The plot.
It’s honestly been a while since I’ve seen a plot so unfocused. During the first half of the story, the book consists mostly of mini-arcs where Molly attempts to solve the various Tasks of the Board of Magic requires her to do. These are all fairly entertaining, but have little relevance to the actual plot that rears its head about halfway through.
Halfway through, the Evil Sorceress that Molly’s impersonating, Eudaimonia, decides to show up. This takes up the rest of the book and is mostly consistent in its plot. However, the Sorceress herself is grossly underdeveloped (Vernon tries to give her a semi-sad backstory. She doesn’t succeed), and I had already figured out what all of the foreshadowing in the first half was going to lead to in the end. I won’t spoil anything, but I’ll just say that I was right. It was really obvious.
But what really got me was how... seperated it felt from the first half. I guess it was just too different in tone and focus. It felt more like a sequel than a second half, and it really bugged me.
What I did like about the second half, however, was the surprisingly serious plotline that came with it. Eudaimonia (this isn’t really a spoiler; you’ll figure it out in three seconds flat) was emotionally abusive towards Molly (constantly putting her down, undermining her self-confidence, etc. She was also gaslighting her, or doing something very similar at the very least). Instead of brushing over this, it has a profound effect on Molly’s character throughout the entire book, and she works through the after-effects in the second half! There’s even some very nice parallels with some of Majordomo’s previous experiences. Like. Wow. I am by no means an authority on these kinds of issues, but I think that the fact that they were properly discussed in a childeren’s book is very important, and from what I can tell, it was handled with respect. This doesn’t often happen, and I’m glad that it did here.
All in all, Castle Hangnail is a fun book with interesting characters and a creative world, but with an unfocused and predictable plot.
I recommend reading Castle Hangnail if:
You are looking for something relaxing and fun.
You are looking for something with a likable female main character, but not too much plot
You are like slice-of-life fantasy and can deal with unfocused plots
You liked Howl’s Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones (seriously. I’m getting so much of the same vibes) and are looking for something similar.
I do not recommend reading Castle Hangnail if:
You are looking for a book with a cohesive/good plot
You are the type to become annoyed by unfocused plots
You dislike reading books obviously written for children
You are easily triggered by emotional abuse and/or gaslighting
I’ll be honest, Castle Hangnail was a situation where I may have judged a book by its cover. Honestly, it didn’t appeal to me, didn’t speak to me, until one day I felt possessed to pick it up and start reading.
I was hooked from the first page.
On my long commute home from test one of three during this week, I was happy that Castle Hangnail had kept me company through the traffic jam. Being trapped on a bus without a book is my worst nightmare, and having it allowed me to devour a large chunk of the book on the way home. Castle Hangnail is a very engrossing middle grade read with a lot of subtle humour and a cast of wonderfully out there characters. Molly is just so sweet, yet by the end of the book you understand why she’s the “wicked twin,” Majordomo just made me laugh because he has his own self conflict with master and servitude that is written SO CLEVERLY. It’s fun to watch him assert dominance and then all of a sudden backtrack because, wait, he’s a servant.
There’s just something addicting about the way in which Castle Hangnail is written. It’s vivid, animated, and even the artwork within the book is well paced and appropriate to the plot. When the book attempts to share tough issues with the readers, it’s easy stuff that anyone can relate to and it does it very matter-of-factly which I liked. If anything, the only downside of Castle Hangnail might have been how easy the resolve was, yet it worked for the story. I loved the ending itself, which I won’t spoil, but lets just say it made me laugh.
Castle Hangnail cast a spell on me, and I don’t regret reading it. This is one of those middle grade novels that may look a bit childish on the outside, but it’s a lot richer on the inside. Vernon balances humour and realistic issues while still writing a fun story on top of it. This is one of those middle grade reads that would especially be great around Halloween, though really it’s themes and ideas are so universal that anyone, at any time, can simply pick the book up and enjoy it.
