#changing self

[theemotionmachine]

You are under no obligation to be the same person you were five minutes ago.

Alan Watts

[sentientcanvas]

I've been ship of Theseus'd so many times that I'm not sure if I'm myself anymore

[awomanfirstpoems]

Changing others, changing self!

Changing others, changing self!

CHANGING OTHERS, CHANGING SELF! Today, I read this with mixed feelings: “Be wary of people who constantly keep an eye on what you’re doing but don’t compliment or support you.” – Dhar Mann – Have you ever felt this way at work, at home, or in your social circle? Do you feel unappreciated by your boss, your spouse, your friends? But Nicky Gumble says, “You can’t change how people treat you or what…

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[awomanfirstpoems]

Changing others, changing self!

Changing others, changing self!

CHANGING OTHERS, CHANGING SELF!

  Today, I read this with mixed feelings:

“Be wary of people who constantly keep an eye on what

you’re doing but don’t compliment or support you.”

Dhar Mann –

  Have you ever felt this way at work, at home, or in your social circle?

Do you feel unappreciated by your boss, your spouse, your friends?

  But Nicky Gumble says,

“You can’t change how people treat you or…

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[anything-advice-blog]

How can I love myself. My friends say I need to change so I'm gonna try for them. But I don't know ethier to accept myself or change. Cause I really love my friends and I want them to be happy. How do I change for them?

Hey dear,

First, why are they asking you to change? Change isn’tnecessarily always a bad thing but it’s not always a good thing. So askyourself why you need to change and whether or not you think this change issomething you’ll be able to live with. Don’t ever change yourself to satisfysomeone else. You may not be happy with the person they’re molding you into andyou have to live with yourself forever. If you think that this change is good,this change is something that you personally think is beneficial, then we canhelp you. But you are unique and there are many things that make you unique. Itmay be your honesty. It may be your gentleness. It may be your eagerness toargue about things that you love. Whatever it is, make sure that you aren’tleaving behind the best parts of you. I know that you want your friends to behappy but if you’re not happy then it’s pointless.

I have a page here that can helpyou understand and practice self-love. But remember that your happiness isimportant too.

Always by your side,

Kelly

[adviceandsupportforyou]

Part 1 I've been wanting to change not just my personality but my style I know it's silly but all my friends always go through a change and im left behind still the same girl since the 7th grade im in 10th. i want to be more than some awkward girl.

Part 2 i want to be more bolder and laid back. I don't want to look at my friends and think how sad it is that i can't catch up. I don't want to be a doormat anymore i want to still care for them but not as much any advice on style/personality?

======================

Babe, 

There is really not a formula for changing who you are. It’s not wrong to not change. In fact, I bet you a million dollars that you’ve changed. We don’t always realise that we have changed until we’re much older and much wiser. It’s kind of like if someone you see every single day got taller and taller, little by little, each day you’re not going to notice it until one day you look back at their old pictures and think “Damn they got tall.” We don’t notice the subtle changes that happen in our lives and that’s totally fine. You’re still very young so trust me when I say you still have a long way to go. If I am honest, I don’t think you should change who you are. You can try and be bolder but changing your personality completely isn’t really ideal, in my opinion. I believe that we are who we are for a reason and there’s some good in that and we shouldn’t lose that in order to become someone else or something else. So try and think of it more as, “I want to try something new” rather than, “I want to be someone else.” 

As you get older, you’ll realise that your best friends are probably not the best thing for you and eventually you’ll learn that you deserve better or that you may not match like you did before. Those are changes that can happen and it’s okay to let that happen. I had friends that I cared about so much before but have stopped simply because their lifestyle is different from mine or from what I see it to be. So if you think that your friends are different from you, try to assess what kind of difference it is and whether or not it’s a good difference. As you reach your late teens, parties and boys become a huge factor and sometimes people change their attitudes about friendship for that. 

My only advice about being bolder is to take a chance. it’s going to be hard but take a chance and do something new. If you’ve never joined a club before, do that. Say hi to that guy in English. Say hello to someone new in class every day. Allowing yourself to be a little more open to the people around you will help with your confidence. You don’t have to be their friends right away but it will help break the ice a lot faster when you’ve established some sort of connection with them even if it’s just very brief. 

If you’re not the type to be okay with smoking weed and having sex, then you’re not the type. There is nothing you can do that will change how you see that because even if you do change deep down you’ll feel that it’s wrong. So don’t force yourself to go against what you believe. Does that make sense? I really want people to be honest with themselves. My sister is a huge party pooper and she knows it. But she doesn’t care because she’s not the type to party or to hug a stranger and that’s okay. There are people who get it and they don’t mind. So i hope that one day you’ll be comfortable with yourself as well. 

-Kelly

[itsalec-hi]

There are so many changes happening in my life right now and I HATE change. I am getting so stressed and overwhelmed. The only thing I have to hold onto is Taylor right now.

[kelvinlimjk-blog]

The fountain of content must spring up in the mind, and he who hath so little knowledge of human nature as to seek happiness by changing anything but his disposition, will hustle his life in fruitless efforts and multiply the grief he proposes to remove.

Samuel Johnson