You become what would have saved you.
Katara lost her mom. It tore her world apart. Being told her whole life it was scary, but they'd be okay if they were together. She tried to become what Kya left behind, a dependable maternal figure who holds the whole world together. But if, when the raid happened, had she not been 8 years old, and stronger and braver, she could've fought and it might've ended differently. Katara grows, and learns how to fight, and faces her deepest emotions. She goes to war, she rallies crowds, she does things because she feels like they're the right thing, just like her dad.
And Sokka lost his mom too, and his dad, and his sister and his tribe. Kya wasn't the end for Sokka, she was the beginning. He tried to become what Hakoda needed, a fearless warrior, who could take on a whole ship single handed. But none of this would have to happen if the world wasn't so cruel to wage war for 100 years. Sokka grows, unlearns hateful lessons, overcomes loss after loss with grace. He goes to war, he keeps his kids safe, he goofs off and plans meticulously to make sure everyone's alright, just like his mom.
Do you ever think they'll look at the other one day and go "oh, oh, it's you. You saved me"












