Anxiety is an old friend of mine. She thinks she’s protecting me— sometimes she might be, but the truth is, more often than not she is afraid of the past repeating itself. She is most afraid that safe people will hurt us, because of valid past experiences. Every now and then she will fully put her trust in someone’s guidance, and she revels in that— but that doesn’t last, nothing is promised. Good or bad.
But I’m not a child anymore, and at some point she’s gotta trust me a little. I’ve learned a few things across the years— my intuition is kick ass (well trained by hypervigilence) and I can take care of myself all on my lonesome if I need to.
But sometimes she sabotages good things, or causes me to avoid and miss out on opportunities.
Enter the little courageous warrior who at times silences her, and fights past the hedges and walls that anxiety builds. Sometimes she wins.
But I am always the both/and. Every day of my life, they have each fought to protect me, guide me, and give me hope eternal to fight a new day.
I will not let them down. 😌
