#dad alfred

[bruciemilf]

is it just my " Bruce loves Alfred so much and just wants to be like him" brain playing tricks on my ears, or did Battinson have a slight british accent in the movie at times??

I like to believe he tried to imitate Alfred so much when he was little.

The dark hair and doe eyes, permanently sad but alluring and mysterious, he had from Martha. He has Thomas' roman mouth, elegant bow in the middle.

They both smile with their whole teeth first, moon glow bright, Thomas with a grin made for vintage magazines of American gentlemen with lips puckered around a cigar, and Bruce with Martha’s pointy canines.

He's their baby through and through.

But he wants to be Alfred's baby, too.

Alfred comes to pick Bruce up from kindergarten one day. He notices something unusual. His little sir socializing willingly.

Bruce approaching his newest friend, Oliver Queen, timidly, but eager, " I can talk funny like my papa. Listen,"

He does the worst British accent Alfred's ever heard, and he had to stand through Thomas' Queen Elizabeth impersonations. Bruce comes over to him and asks him why he's crying.

[mikeluciraphgabe]

Villain of the week (tm): bla bla bla evil plan bla bla join me or die Batman

Bruce: let me ask my dad first

Villain: ? Ain’t he dead-

Bruce, on the phone with Alfred: he wants me to be evil

Alfred: Unless if you want (insert your safe food) for dinner, go ahead

Bruce, hanging up and turning to Villain: Sorry, he said no

[dick-nightwing-grayson]

Alfred bribes zbruce to go to meeting with these. Dick (11yo) finds it childish.

[enchantedscribblings]

Okay so here's the deal: kids usually lose their last baby teeth around like 11-13, according to google

Damian was around 10 when he went to live with Bruce.

Smell what I'm stepping in?

No? Let me help you envision it

Damian is sitting on the couch with his hand in his mouth. Alfred walks into the room to do a little bit of dusting. The second Damian notices Alfred, they pull their hand out of their mouth.

Alfred: Loose tooth, sir? Or is something amiss?

Damian: I don't know what you're referring to, Pennyworth.

Alfred: I'm sorry sir, I seem to have forgotten that master assassins don't have baby teeth to lose.

Damian: tt

Alfred: Just know that when you lose a tooth in a great battle, and definitely not from growing older, if you put it beneath your pillow the tooth fairy will come for it and leave behind a small gift for you

Damian: I am well aware of these children's stories, Pennyworth, and I am well aware that they are fictitious.

Alfred: Very well, sir.

Later Alfred is standing in the kitchen cutting vegetables to add to his stew when Damian walks in, holding a tooth

Damian: Pennyworth, what am I supposed to do with this

Alfred: You are supposed to leave it beneath your pillow for the night, sir.

Damian: Pennyworth, you do realize that there is no way that anyone could sneak into my chambers to fulfill this childish game you insist on, correct?

Alfred: You are certainly entitled to your opinions, young sir.

That night Damian looks at the tooth and shrugs. He puts it under his pillow with a smirk and goes to sleep. He wakes up the next morning and has to stop himself from laughing.

Damian: All that and he didn't even try? I expected more from him.

Damian reaches under his pillow for the tooth. He pats around for a second and can't find it. He lifts his pillow with disbelief. The tooth is gone. He turns to look toward the door and spots it. A little package on his nightstand with a red ribbon tied into a bow.

Damian: No way...

He picks up the box and opens it. There is a note reading "Thanks for believing in me!" in handwriting that could plausibly belong to a fae. Beneath the note is a leather braided bracelet with beads.

Damian: How?

[frostbittenbucky]

Bruce Wayne, a grown man: “Alfred?”

Bruce: [goes in the kitchen] “Alfred?”

Bruce: [goes to the dinning room] “Alfred?”

Bruce: [goes to the foyer] “Alfred?”

Bruce: [goes to the living room] “Alfred?”

Bruce: [goes to the library] “Alfred?”

Bruce: [goes to his office] “Alfred]

Bruce: [goes to the tea room] “Alfred?”

Tim: “what do you need?”

Bruce: “I need to find, Alfred. It’s important”

Tim: “check the garden or something”

Bruce: [nods and checks the garden] “Alfred?”

Bruce: [checks the greenhouse] “Alfred?”

Bruce: [in the 2nd living room] “Alfred?”

Alfred: “yes, Master Bruce?”

Bruce: [pulls something out his pocket] “look at this leaf and rock I found” [opens his other hand] “and look at this tiny frog”

Alfred: “splendid, Master Bruce. Release the frog and we’ll find a spot for the leaf and rock”

Bruce: [nodding] “ok, but need to find Damian now so he can see the frog”

Alfred: [pulling his phone out] “a photograph will do, Master Bruce”

[phantomchick]

I’M HERE TO SHARE MORE PROUD DAD ALFRED LOVE! Literally: He is a doting adoptive parent who secretly records and documents his child’s achievements by hand. It is adorable. 

[dick-nightwing-grayson]

If y'all don't stop fighting, I'm calling the Alfred stans.

Oh, are the Alfred stans still pretending that he is alive? 😉

(This is actually really funny, thank you anon)

[dick-nightwing-grayson]

My 8yo son: Bruce will only eat sandwiches that are shaped like a bat when he is Batman. Alfred makes them with a special sandwich cutter