Been a while since I've played Darksiders (so much so I forgot how the hell to get off Ruin) but i bring more screenshots.
One of these had me like

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Been a while since I've played Darksiders (so much so I forgot how the hell to get off Ruin) but i bring more screenshots.
One of these had me like
So I had an idea. The horsemen all believe it would be safer for the human when traveling through hell together that they were magically disguised to look like a demon. They still look like themselves but still very demonic, pretty ram horns that curl back, a sater like body with cloven hooves, a long tail with a fluffy tip, and leathery wings. It works for the most part, but the human doesn't know the language or the customs. They come across as more polite than usual. Amongst the demons, they are considered very beautiful. Some new problems occur when demons keep trying to offer gifts. Jewelry for the horns and wings, silks for skirts, etc. The human just thinks they are being nice, not that they are being courted. This makes it difficult, especially when they go to meet Samael, he can see through the magics but doesn't call them out. He likes the display, the human looks good as a demon. The Horsemen are regretting their choices.
OOOOH I love this!! You’d awaken on your side after the magic has been cast, groaning as you come back to your senses, a dull throb in your head. You attempt to stand but your legs wobble beneath you like a newborn fawn, the four quickly rushing to your side to help steady you. Holding tightly onto War’s arm for support, you begin to gingerly walk around and get accustomed to your new stride.
Your mouth hangs agape when you finally get a look at yourself.
The disguise is indistinguishable, save for a few up-close features like the shape of your eyes that only those who truly know you could recognise. You really look the part.
If only you could behave like it.
Despite your true form being hidden, the horsemen are still just as on guard as usual, especially when the first demon approaches you. To their astonishment, they make no efforts to attack, instead offering you a gold piece of jewellery. As pretty as it is, you have no idea why they’re giving it to you. Maybe as a peace offering? Albeit with clear uncertainty, your acceptance makes the demon’s chest puff out with pride. You even thank them for it, flashing a sharp-toothed smile their way.
Before you know it, you’ve been thoroughly bedazzled by several suitors, each one making the horsemen feel increasingly unsure of their decision. Who out of them could have guessed that fighting off any demons who dare attempt to bring harm upon you would be easier (and less provoking) than watching them try to woo you?
“Wow! If only they were all this friendly with humans!”
“Friendly is not the word I’d use…"
Seeing you in this form is such a treat for Samael. It’s foolish to think the demon prince would be none the wiser. He knows it’s you, he can smell it. That, and your whole demeanour is far too gentle. As alluring as you are in this form, he prefers you in your natural state. Soft and completely harmless to anything. Just the way he likes you.
He can’t wait to see the look on your face when he calls you by your true name. He may even undo the spell himself, eagerly waiting for you to realise that you’re no longer hidden from him. Although, you never really were in the first place.
A few of them can actually be placed in another area too. Like Samael being the whole coordination part or War being I disagree.
Can you tell us more about Barsiders? What's Samael supposed to look like? And is this an x reader type of story? If so, what's their role in all this?
Ngl, I never really thought about Sameal's appearance, but then this question popped up and I had to do something for him.
I sorta feel like a lot of the demon characters would try to masquerade as "human", or rather toned down versions of themselves (save for Vulgrim. He works behind the scenes so there's not much of a need to hide).
When I think of Samael as a human I defo think of characters like Ganon (LoZ) and Jet (Cowboy Bebop): jagged hairline, good beard, heavy eyebrows. He himself has those features (minus the hair), so I wanted to push on those.
To prep, I did a draw over of his features from the game model. Then I went over and added the human features. This is just to see where my landmarks are at.
From there I draw it again without the model and look at what I put over top. This helps to separate and gain confidence for the design. (Sometimes I even return back to it at a later date and draw it from memory to keep prominent features. Helps to concentrate a character design in my opinion.)
That got me this:
I feel like he's a pretty cutthroat business man who wears a nice suit and has well-maintained everything.
I'd like to think of this as an xReader type of story. Sort of like Reader ends up in some dirty dealings due to debt and has to resolve it by working in Hell, which tosses them into the middle of a bar turf war or something. Maybe they bond with Dis over a shared debt to Vulgrim, and it ends up as an Ouran Highschool Host Club type deal (can you tell I've been watching a ton of anime lately lol?). They have to work off the debt somehow and end up doing that by working at the bar. Maybe they catch the eye of the horsemen, or maybe they make a name for themselves as one of the best at the bar as either a bartender or waitstaff or even as a singer or bouncer! Maybe they work the front of house and everyone flirts with them. It all depends on what you want to do with it; The possibilities are endless!
Either way, I'd like to think that anyone can get in on this. I remember seeing someone ask if they could draw things for this AU, and the answer is totally yes! Feel free to have fun with it! Credit me if you like, or don't. I don't mind either way as I'm just looking to have fun with this.
I'm glad you all seem to like it though! I may write some blurbs about it later, or when I'm working. It'll give me something to do.
Imagine Samael trying to make you smell more like him by rubbing his cheek against you whenever he can, much to your alarm and mortification.
Yours is a soul enslaved to the will of Moloch and he devises a plan, He sends you to infiltrate Samael's fortress, and under the charming guise meant of seduction you are to learn all you can and report your findings to Moloch so he can begin his siege.
But does a certain dark lord know of your deception? Does he play along, baiting the mouse along into his own trap?
In the modern AU where reader is travelling with War, he is speaking with Samael when he realises his ward is not at his side. In fact... she's not anywhere in sight!
That is until he sees a small shape creeping up on Samael's back and begins to pat Samael's bald head, alarming even the demon of omnipresence itself.
Darksiders Headcanons #4: Human Food
Sorry that this took a while. Been a bit busy and didn't have much time to write.
Before we begin. There is one problem. Earth got wreaked. A lot. Which means that a lot of Earth's environments, plant, and animal life either changed or went extinct. How do we fix this? In my last headcanon I suggested that the Angels kept various copies of items and human media in all of it's forms as a way to explain how things like DVDs are still around 100 years after the apocalypse.
In this case Azrael took an interest in all the kinds of plants that grew on Earth. Over the years, and in secret, he collected seeds from the plants of Earth, learns how to grow them, and creates a green house that he cares for with a few of his scribes who are also interested in Earth's plant life.
This means that after Azrael was forced to open the Well of Souls and got trapped, his scribes took on the job of caring for the green house full time. And some of the plant life they actually like. Flowers are one of the favorites because they bring all sorts of colors to Heaven, since (as for as I have seen), Heaven mostly has white and yellow colors in their architecture (other than the occasional grey). So as you can guess they really likes the other kinds of colors that flowers have, I imagine tulips are a popular choice because of just how many different styles and patterns of tulips there are (there have been quite a few arguments over which tulip if best).
Another favorite type of plant is the ones that bear fruit and vegetables. Now, since Angels and Demons don't seem to need to eat, I imagine that they simple eat to enjoy the flavors, or in the case of Demons, they enjoy the taste of blood found in animals.
In my mind, a favorite fruit for Angels (particularly scribes) are grapes and apples. Why? Because unlike other fruits like strawberries and pomegranate seeds, they don't make a mess when you bite into them. This makes them perfect little snacks for scribes to have in a simple bowl while sorting scrolls or doing repetitive work. (there are others but if I include every single fruit and vegetable this would be too long)
On the other hand, they didn't really like plants like peppers, limes, and lemons. Actually, the first time an Angel ate a pepper out of curiosity they quickly panicked and asked for water because they felt like their mouth was on fire. Because of that, for a while at least, peppers became a test of resilience for the warrior Angels. Same thing for limes and lemons, but instead of a test of resilience, they became a test to see if you could not make a face after tasting the fruit's juice (basically a test to see if you could hold a poker face. and yes Abaddon succeeded. Uriel did not. she failed after a few seconds).
Most demons on the other hand, didn't care for plants. If they wanted to eat, it was meat, meat, and raw bloody meat. And even then, most of the time, it wasn't to enjoy the flavors of raw (or accidentally cooked) meat. It was often a way to intimidate enemies and allies alike by showing off the raw power of their sharp teeth. Though you won't see powerful figures like Samael doing this because he doesn't need to show off how powerful he is since his mere presence and aura are enough and if anyone was still stupid enough to try and take down the Lord of The Black Stone, he will put them in their place.
Though there is still one problem. Animals. Now one idea I have is that when Death revives humanity, the souls of humanity (who have not been cleansed of their past life because they hadn't been sent back into creation and thus still remembered their life) argued that animals counted as part of humanity because of how intertwined the lives of humans and animals are. So in the end, Death basically got a "revive one species and you revive the entire biosphere" deal. Why do I think this would work? Because let's be honest. The Nephilim were created from both Angels and Demons and they were very powerful. And this is the souls of their entire race (minus 4) we are talking about and as established in lore, souls are powerful, so (in my mind) it would make sense that a soul of a Nephilim would be more powerful than a soul of an Angel or Demon.
But what about if my idea ends up not working out? What then?
*Vulgrim has entered the chat*
What why is that here?
Vulgrim: I have a solution. Now you go on and get yourself some water while I explain.
Now hang on! This is my story and you can't just -
Vulgrim: Well. Now that they are out of the way. I can tell you my solution.
Vulgrim: Even before the apocalypse I knew that the Earth would suffer and in it, I saw an opportunity. I knew how much the humans cared for their animals and I knew that the Horsemen would not allow the humans to go extinct. So I decided to keep various animals that I knew humans kept as "farm animals" to make a profit in the future. Was it hard? Very. Did I almost quit? Almost. But the thought of the future profits kept me going.
Vulgrim: And I was right. After Abaddon was slain by War and Death revived humanity there was a need for food. I was originally going to accept human souls for food but then the Horsemen, mostly Death, paid the bill in coin and in the form of the souls of Angels and Demons. As you humans say, I racked in the gold. The Angels may have their plants that they give freely, but I have a monopoly on meats and other precious animals such as felines and canines and other animals that will help Earth to return to what it was before the apocalypse.
come in here and hey I'm back. So you done?
Vulgrim: Indeed.
Cool. Now please get out.
*Vulgrim leaves the chat*
So yeah. My other idea is that Vulgrim pulls a Noah from the bible and makes a giant farm and keeps a bunch of animals to later sell to humans at a high but reasonable price. He still has to make a living and this is the apocalypse we are taking about. So with everything set up, it is time for my take on what Angels and Demons think of human cooking.
At first, most Angels and Demons didn't really think much of it. Except for a few Angel scribes that worked under Azrael. They were quick to ask about cooking since the idea of it was something new to them and the idea that you could make something new out of ordinary ingredients was really fascinating. Foods like candy, cakes, soup, and even bread quickly became favorites for the scribes to enjoy during breaks or while hanging out and talking to other scribes. Especially the different types of bread. Cause. You're telling me that you can use the same basic ingredients to create all these different types of one food simply by using different methods of cooking it and adding other ingredients?! Wild.
As you can guess. It was funny to watch a bunch of nerdy angels geek out over bread and other kinds of food like cheese as well as how these foods are made and the history behind how humans found out how to make them.
In my opinion, most Angels prefer the more fruity, sweet, and mild flavors of human cooking. But like before with the pepper, lime, and lemon challenge, some took a liking to the more spicy, sour, and salty flavors of human cooking. And others took a liking to it as well. Others, like the Demons and it all begins in the spice capital of the world. India.
For those who don't know, India is known as the spice capital of the world as well as the birthplace of spices. Also, in famous Gordan Ramsay's show Uncharted, he travels to India to learn about it's food culture and gets treated to an extremely spicy drink that makes him spit it out almost instantly, smells like nothing at all, and even looks clear as water. This is the native chili called "kandhari".
Other than it's spices, India is also known for it's curry and the many different kind of curry found in India. While there are many other things that India is known for, I will be focusing on curry, spice, and the coconut and coconut milk that is known for helping curry have a milder flavor and a fragrant smell.
It starts when rumors of demons living in India are holding a village hostage. War and Fury leave with a few warrior angels, led by Uriel, to scout out the situation. When they get there they see a village and they see demons. But it doesn't look like they are holding the village hostage. They are actually eating with the humans. One of the women speaks up.
Woman 1: Hello. Have you traveled far? Come and eat with us. We just made some curry.
Uriel: Good evening to you. We heard rumors of demons keeping this village hostage. But it appears that the rumor is false. Can you tell us how you came to coexist with demons?
One of the demons stands up.
Demon 1: I'll explain what happened. We originally came to this village to take what valuables we could find. But then the smell of this curry attracted our attention. We traded some coin for a few bowls and the taste was something truly incredible. So we stayed and in exchange for helping to keep this village safe we get a bowl of curry everyday.
Demon 2: Yes. The human women here are truly masters of their craft and the art of using spices in their cooking.
Woman 1: You are more than welcome to try some if you'd like.
The woman pours a few bowls of curry and offers it to them.
War, Fury, and Uriel look at each other before an angel takes a bowl.
Angel 1: How spicy could a single dish be?
He was proven wrong the exact moment he took a bite and froze.
Angel 1: HOTHOTHOTHOT! OH BY THE CREATOR THIS TASTES OF HELL ITSELF!
The angel then proceeds to cough like mad.
Woman 2: Yeah that's about what I expected.
Woman 1: *laughing her but off*
Fury: *also laughing like a mad woman*
Uriel: I've tried limes and peppers before but none gave anyone THAT kind of reaction.
Woman 2: HA! The spices we grow and use here are much stronger than your typical limes or peppers. Our home, India, is known for being the spice capital of the world. And curry uses a number of species all blended together.
Uriel: Now I see why he acts like as if he ate solid hellfire.
One of the women then hands the angel a drink which he snatches up and finishes in just a few gulps.
Angel: What kind of drink is this? It doesn't taste like water. In fact it is quite sweet.
Woman 2: That is coconut water. Helps to cool down the body.
And to add insult to injury when the angel looks back he sees humans eating the curry no problem! Just what kind of taste buds do they have!?
Fury: So what kind of food is curry anyway?
Woman 1: It is a spicy dish and some versions have different meats and vegetables. And here we love our spices.
Fury: *looking at the angel who tried the curry* I can see that.
War: So everything is. Good here?
Woman 1: Yes. We are just fine.
Fury: So um. Can I try some of that?
War: I would also like a bowl.
Uriel: I think I'll stick to trying that coconut water you mentioned before.
With that they had a wonderful time talking to the villagers, trying the local cuisine and drinks (and watching the angels who did also try the curry absolutely lose it at how spicy it was since for many of them it was their first time trying something spicy and this is India, the capital of spice, for crying out loud), and getting information from the demons on actually evil plans going down around Asia (as far as they knew at least).
(Last thing. If I got anything about India or curry wrong please let me know. I strive to represent different cultures accurately and I don't want to accidentally misrepresent different cultures or use racist terms.)