Before the transition, Dew had gills and fins, but not the thicker finned tail of a water ghoul. He was a multighoul with a dormant element, much like Delta had been, but hopefully less of a failure. He had long and thin dark horns, similar to a gazelle.
Post transition, his fins and gills are gone. Long white scars jagged across his skin, thin between his fingers where the webbing used to be. Most visible though on his neck, gills forever sealed, the excess cut away. His horns too are different, now short and white. Only the bone left.
It's so hard to breathe, like his chest is compressed. It's also far colder than he remembers. The cold didn't used to bother him, but now his joints ache and he barely feels tethered to his body beyond the pain. Aether and his quintosis help ground him, the familiar scent and the comforting Presence of the larger ghoul. Of course that's after he allows him anywhere near his disfigured corpse body.
Nightmares are Never Fun: Dew/Aether/GN Reader (hurt/comfort)
A/N: I have been taking a break from writing the religion trauma piece as it has really just messed with my mental health. I have been distracting myself by writing shorter works that I think more people would enjoy.
Summary: You, Aether, and Dew are all mated together. Your original mate is Aether, but the two of you realized Dew was a mate as well. While the three of you were always pretty happy, Dew suffers from horrible nightmares due to past abandonments and trauma. You and Aether are the only ones who know how to help him.
Warnings: not really warnings but this piece is emotional Dew and comforting Aether and Reader. Also, Phantom gets hurt trying to sooth Dew.
You woke up to the feeling of being shaken. You open your eyes and are met by Phantom towering over your bed trying to get your attention. You were so confused as usually Aether was the one to wake you from his tossing and turning. Tonight you slept alone because the two of you had an argument and you just wanted to be alone. The ghouls knew not to worry you unless it was urgent. Unless someone was sick or dying.
“What could you possibly need, Phantom,” you grumbled, annoyance and sleep riddling your voice.
”It’s Dew, he- he’s-“ the new ghoul tried to get out without crying.
”Hey, Ant, it’s okay. Is he sick? Is he dead?” You tried to ease him while making sure the resident fire ghoul wasn’t dead.
”Neither. He’s hurting himself. Screaming. He’s scaring me. I can’t get him to stop. I tried to touch him but he, he hurt me,” Phantom cried out, clearly scared about the other ghoul.
“Okay, alright. Let’s go check on him. Can you go wake Aether and tell him to get some of dew’s special meds and bring him to Dew’s room while I go ahead in there?” You asked, sympathetically.
He nodded his head and made his way to Aether’s room while you threw on some pants before making your way down to Dew’s room. As you approached his door, you heard the muffled screams. This one was going to be bad. You cracked open the door and saw the fire ghoul laying on the concrete floor with his face in a pillow as he kicked his legs as if someone was on top of him. He was crying into his screams. You could hear the saliva in the back of his throat as he produced gurgled screeches. You entered his room and quickly shut the door behind you, being sure not to startle him right off the bat. You walked up to him and knelt next to him.
”Dew,” you said quietly and gently as you grabbed his burning arm, nothing.
”Dewdrop, hey,” you said again, a little louder, maybe more stern, while giving his arm a shake, this caught his attention.
The small fire ghoul locked eyes with you and stopped screaming but started violently sobbing, causing himself to cough and gag.
You pulled him to you, making sure he could feel your skin, along with your heartbeat. This allowed him to understand that it was one of his safe people. You and Aether were the only people he trusted when it came to his nightmares and his anxiety. From the way you were sitting on the cold floor, you could not get the footing to pick him up and get him back into his nest. You stayed where you were as you gently rocked Dew back and forth, trying to sooth him more. His hands started to grab at his hair, giving it a harsh pull as he tangled his fingers into it.
”Hey, Dew, babe. Let’s not pull your pretty hair out. Here, give me your hands, put this one on my heart, and the other on my face,” you instructed as you grabbed his hands and placed them.
His hand was hot against your face. You felt his fingers relax against your soft skin. This tactic was something Aether taught you when the two of you decided to include Dew into your relationship. As you sat there comforting your second mate, you wondered if him experiencing the heated argument you and Aether had earlier had anything to do with this outburst. As the fire ghoul started to calm in your arms, his door opened slowly as Aether and Phantom slipped into the room. This caused Dew to start to panic again. He pointed at Aether and started to sob. This attack was definitely prompted by the argument.
“Dew. Dewdrop. You’re okay. It’s just Aether. You like him,” you said as you tried to get his attention.
“Aether, can you and Phantom please sit on the couch over there while I get him calm again and we can all maybe figure out what happened?” You shot your other mate a look.
He didn’t reply. He just led Phantom over to the couch and sat down with the new quint ghoul. After some more convincing and rocking, you finally got Dew calmed down to the point that he could speak.
”Dew, what happened? Wanna talk about it?” Aether chimed in.
”I’m going to lose you all,” he sniffled as more tears formed in his eyes.
”Hey, fire lily, we are not going anywhere. Why would you think that?” Aether replied, getting off the couch and picking Dew up out of your lap before carrying him to the bed.
This gave you the chance to pry yourself up off the floor with the help of Phantom. Phantom sat back down on the couch as you joined your mates in the nest.
”You two got into a fight. You don’t love each other anymore and you don’t love me. You’re going to leave me because I’m the reason you argue,” Dew muttered out.
”Dewdrop. Aether and I are sometimes. It’s usually about stupid shit, and never has anything to do with you. We love each other just as much as we love you. We are all mates here, and I personally cannot imagine a life without the two of you,” you started to explain.
You looked up and noticed that Aether had tears in his eyes as he smiled at you.
”I love the two of you, so much, and don’t you ever forget that,” you continued.
You placed a kiss on Dew’s forehead before giving Aether a peck on the lips.
“Uhhhh, hey, should I go?” Phantom chirped up.
”Oh, sorry ‘bout that Ant, forgot you were here, I need to tend to your wounds, here let me give Dew his meds then I will take you to the infirmary for stitches,” Aether chuckled.
Aether administered Dew’s anxiety medicine before giving his fire ghoul mate a gentle kiss and crawling out of the nest.
”You got him? Once I’m done with Phantom I will come back and join the two of you,” Aether said before giving you a kiss.
”Yeah, I got him. We are probably just going to cuddle and watch whatever he wants so he can hopefully get back to sleep,” you said as you pulled the fire ghoul to your chest.
With that, Aether took Phantom up to the infirmary and patched him up before sending him back to bed. Dew had drifted off to sleep with his head on your chest as you gently scratched his scalp. Aether returned to the room and crawled to the other side of the Dew, usually you were in the middle but you knew that Dew needed middle time this go around.
“How is he?” Aether asked as he pulled the blanket over himself.
”He’s finally asleep. I think the meds knocked him out,” you replied before giving Aether a kiss.
You gently moved the sleeping fire ghoul off of you and rolled over to face your two mates. Dew was knocked out, and Aether was slowly following suit. Seeing as both of your mates were finally relaxed, and the three of you were all one big happy group again, you decided to try to get some sleep yourself.
A/N: Includes Poly!ghouls, Ghouls are not human (Have horns/tails, purr and growl.)
Summary:
Sodo really needs to learn to think before he speaks.
_
“Back off Phantom, just stop, okay?”
As Sodo spoke, the aggression was clear; venom was practically dripping from every word. His tail was flicking wildly behind him as he spoke. Phantom looked at him, his shoulders drooping slightly, as well as his tail.
“What do yo-”
“You know what I mean. You are nothing like Aether, and you never will be. You are fucking useless.”
Sodo’s insults cut right through Phantom, leaving him trembling. Sodo spat in his direction and stormed off, radiating heat.
Hot tears were stinging Phantom’s eyes, beginning to run down his cheeks. He choked down a sob, violently wiping at his eyes as he walked down the hallway. He ran into a bathroom, slamming and locking the door behind himself. Slowly sliding his back down the wall, he began fully sobbing, bringing his head to his knees.
Fucking Useless.
The words ran through Phantom’s brain on repeat; it wasn’t the first time he’d heard them and he doubted it would be the last. He shakily pulled his sleeve up, staring at the scars up his arm. He’d managed to stay clean for a whole month- the longest he’d managed so far.
Fucking Useless.
As the words echoed through his head, he pulled out a small lock-knife from his pocket, flicking it open. Tears were blurring his vision as he slowly put the knife to his skin, watching as the blood started to appear. Phantom’s tears dripped down to his arm, mixing with his blood. He was completely sobbing now, his shoulders shaking violently.
Knock knock.
“Phantom? Is that you in there?”
It was Rain.
Phantom panicked, eyes darting round the room.
“Y-yeah?” Phantom’s voice came out shaky, cracking slightly as he spoke; not at all like he wanted it to.
Rain’s voice grew more concerned as he knocked again.
“What’s wrong? Let me in, Phantom.”
Phantom frantically scrambled around, rolling his sleeve up and pocketing his knife. He wiped at his face in attempt to stop himself from crying.
“Uh- I-I’m fine, Rain.” His voice cracked on the last word as he let out a loud sob, doing his best to stifle it.
“I’m coming in.”
Phantom looked at the floor, noticing drops of blood on the floor. He quickly tried to wipe it away, but only smeared it more. It was too late; Rain was stood in the doorway, looking down at Phantom as he was sat on the floor, sobbing. His eyes flicked to the smeared blood on the floor and then Phantom’s blood-soaked sleeve.
“Phantom? Oh, honey…” Rain whispered, as he dropped to his knees in front of Phantom. He wrapped his arms around Phantom’s shoulders, pulling him close in a tight embrace. Phantom fell into Rain, burying his face in his chest. Phantom sobbed into Rain’s chest, his hands clinging on to his shirt.
“S-Sodo.. He…”
As he struggled to find the words, Rain put his hand up to Phantom’s head, gently running his hand through his hair.
“Shh, you’re okay. I’ve got you.”
Phantom nuzzled his face into Rain’s neck, his tears soaking through his shirt.
“Phantom, sweetheart, I need to look at your arm.” Rain said, his voice as sweet as can be.
Phantom shook his head, whining quietly as he continued crying. Rain sighed, rubbing his back soothingly.
“What if I get Mountain? He can check it over whilst I’ll keep holding you?”
Phantom shrugged, not saying anything in response. Rain sighed, then took his hand from Phantom’s hair and reached for his phone in his pocket to text Mountain.
Rain:
Mount, can you come to second floor bathroom? It’s Phantom.
Mountain:
Yep, on my way rn.
It only took a matter of minutes for Mountain to appear in the doorway, the tall ghoul looked down at the two huddled together on the floor.
“What happened?” He asked, bending down to be at the same level as he put his hand on Phantoms shoulder, rubbing it soothingly.
“I don’t know, he won’t talk. Can you just look at his arm? He’s bleeding and I don’t know w-what to do-” Rain rambled, clearly slightly panicked.
“Take a breath, Rain. We’ll figure it out, okay?” Mountain responded calmly as he sat down cross-legged on the floor, reaching his hand out to Phantom.
“Hey, let me take a look, Phantom. I’m not going to hurt you, okay?” Mountain soothed, slowly picking up his arm.
Phantom whimpered into Rain’s neck, who was still running his hand through his hair.
Once Phantom’s arm was taken care of, Mountain stood up, slowly taking him from Rain’s lap and picking him up into his arms. Rain stood up, looking at the two.
“I’m going to find Sodo, I’ll find out what happened.” Rain said, his voice seemingly void of emotion.
Mountain nodded at him, reaching out an arm to stroke his arm briefly.
“Alright, I’m gonna settle this one down, come find us later, yeah?” Mountain smiled sweetly, his voice reassuring.
Rain nodded and left; once he did so, Mountain carried Phantom all the way to his bedroom and laid down with him. Immediately, Phantom curled up against him, nuzzling into his chest. He didn’t want to speak, but Mountain understood that, he pulled Phantom close to him, running his hands soothing down his back.
“I’ve got you, bug. You can rest now. I’m not going anywhere.”
Phantom purred softly as he got comfortable in Mountain’s arms.
A/N: I wrote Sodo’s point of view as well, go check it out; https://www.tumblr.com/sodoshame/724291902308040704/if-im-alone-i-cannot-hate
Warnings: Anger, Forms of Self Harm, Self Hatred.
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angst.
Pairing: Mostly Sodo/Swiss.
A/N: Includes Poly!ghouls, Ghou
✢ in an attempt to save himself from more hurt, dew decides to hurt swiss the only way he knows he can.
✢ pairing: Swiss x gn!reader / Dew x Swiss (not romantically)
✢ genre: angst
✢ warnings: manipulation, dew is an asshole, trauma, swiss has a dark past, mentioned murder, hurt/no comfort, dew has issues i dont blame him
✢ a/n: the romantic pairing is reader x swiss, but the story focuses more on dewdrop/ dewdrop x swiss because I wanted to explore this dynamic (and also hurt swiss whoops). Also this got way longer than i wanted it to be so maybe i’ll have to do a part 2 bc i cant stand bad endings :( | not beta read sorry
Dew was known for being the most difficult of the ghouls. He was known for his temper and anger, the heated arguments and the venom in his words.
Dew was known for his low blows.
The other ghouls knew that Dew hardly meant the things he said in a fit of anger and rage. At first the words had stung. The fire ghoul had a talent for finding the most hurtful words and digging deep, reaching for things he knew would provoke a reaction from the others; preferably anger or hurt. And oh boy, was it hurtful at times.
But the better the ghouls got to know him, the more they learned not to take the words to heart, no matter how hard it was at times. They knew it was his way of protecting himself, his way of making sure the other person stopped digging into him, stopped prying open old wounds. It was his way of making sure nobody would ever break down the walls that he so carefully had built around himself.
But even though the ghouls tried to not let the words get to them, they always eventually did. Dew knew how to get under their skin, tear open their wounds so his own could stay closed. A low blow from Dew would usually end the argument, the other ghoul too angry, shocked or hurt to continue the conversation.
But not with Swiss. Not today.
Swiss stood his ground as the fire ghoul spat insult after insult at him. His arms were crossed in front of his broad chest as he listened to the never-ending stream of words, carefully picked out by the smaller ghoul to dig into Swiss’ insecurities and worries. But Swiss saw through Dew easily. He knew that he was trying to deflect from his own worries and traumas. So he stood there and took the verbal abuse because he knew Dew didn’t mean it. Never did.
Swiss was by far one of the hardest ghouls to truly anger. He was very forgiving, especially with the smallest ghoul. He tended to laugh things off or talk things out right away as to not leave an argument unresolved. If the other ghoul thought about it, he had never seen Swiss even remotely angry. There were times where he seemed pissed off but never really angry.
“Are you done yet, firefly?” The nickname sounded sour on Swiss’s tongue and Dew almost visibly recoiled. But he knew better than to show a reaction. He had to be indifferent, hide that he was vunerable. But the comment had thrown him off and his brain short-circuited long enough for Swiss to finally get a word in.
“You stand here and go about your little spiel like you always do, Dew. But we both know you don’t mean it. You can curse and scream at me all you want; it won’t change a thing. There wasn’t even a real argument to begin with. You got your fragile ego hurt and now you’re foaming at the mouth like a rabid animal.”
Dewdrop growled at that. Low in his throat as his tail swished angrily behind himself. It was true, and that was what angered the fire ghoul the most. Satanas, Dew had already forgotten what the whole argument was even about. He was only arguing for the sake of getting Swiss off his tail. To hurt the multi ghoul so that he wouldn’t end up being hurt himself. The other ghoul was entirely too calm for his liking and it scared Dewdrop. It scared him that he didn’t have control of the conversation. It scared him that Swiss knew exactly what he was trying to archive. Scared him that he was so fucking vunerable in front of someone after he had sworn himself to never be open like that again. He opened his mouth to say something he knew would hurt Swiss, but the other ghoul was faster to speak.
“Do you know what I think? I think you’re getting so defensive because you know I am right. You know you don’t even mean a single thing you say to us all the time. Because you’re scared to let someone - for once in your goddamn life - into that head of yours. Because you’re so fucking scared that if you let someone in, they will tear you down from the inside. Because you know you couldn’t take that again.” Swiss’s words seemed harsh but he was calm, somewhat encouraging even.
But Dewdrop was seething where he was standing. He felt like he was vibrating with anger. His fists were balled up so tightly, he could feel the sharp claws dig into his own flesh. His fangs were clenched so tightly, he was afraid they would break off under the pressure. If he’d had just a little less self control, he would have launched himself at the multi ghoul and ripped into him with claws and teeth. Copia and the clergy be damned. They would send him back to the pit for killing another ghoul, but he couldn’t care less in that moment.
Where did the multi ghoul get the audacity to dig into Dew’s head like that? Rip him open piece be piece and present him with his own thoughts. It sent him into a frenzy.
In that moment Dewdrop felt truly lost. There was no thing he could say to Swiss to make him stop, to make him leave. Dew nearly choked on his own spit. His throat felt tight as he tried to swallow. It became apparent that the fire ghoul wasn’t the only one who knew how to hurt others deeply.
Dew bared his fangs at Swiss and hissed. It wasn’t intentional, a leftover instinct from the pit that was generally considered bad manners by the higher clergy members. Swiss stood calmly but his tail jerked once, showing that he wasn’t immune to the feral display of agression from his bandmate.
And with a last growl, Dewdrop turned on his heel and left Swiss standing in the hallway. He felt humiliated and hurt. He was never the one to leave an argument, had never lost to the others. In his mind he was thinking of a thousand things he could do to hurt Swiss. The argument might have been over, but he wouldn’t - no, couldn’t - let the multi ghoul get away with this. He had to do something that would truly and utterly destroy the taller ghoul.
-
He was still seething as he stumbled through the clergy hallways. A few siblings he came across had fled once they saw him. Good, he thought, at least he was still respected by the siblings. They would never dare to talk to him the way Swiss did. Would never dare to pry into his head like that. They knew they couldn’t because he would rip them to shreds if they tried. Just like how he should have done with dear Swiss, he thought angrily, his fists clenched again.
He marched through the hallways for a little longer before something caught his eyes. And suddenly it felt like he was presented with a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity sent by the hellish father lucifer himself.
You.
How had Dewdrop not thought of that before? Swiss’s little romance he had going on with you. It was still fresh, long months of ‘will-they-won’t-they’ finally turned into little kisses and shared nights. And that turned into actual feelings. Swiss had never officially told you how he felt, Dew knew that, but he could smell it on the multi ghoul. And he could smell it on you too. With renewed vigor (and anger) he walked up to you.
Should he grab you and hurt you? Should he leave your body bloodied with bitemarks and drag you back into the ghoul den? The smell of your blood would be so overwhelming it would surely sent the multi ghoul into overdrive. A perverted satisfaction spread through Dew’s body at the thought. The satisfaction of truly hurting Swiss in the most horrible way he could. To finally make the multi ghoul snap. Because with anger Dew could work. Anger he knew how to handle. But no, he thought. That was too risky. It would get him a ticket straight back to hell from the clergy. And it wouldn’t hurt enough. Wouldn’t dig deeply enough into Swiss’ heart.
It was like a light went off above the fire ghoul’s head as you turned around, smiling at him as he approaced you. He tried to keep his face stoic, to not let a toothy smile shine through as he finally decided how to wreck Swiss.
“Dewdrop.”, you said warmly, “Is there something I can do for you?”
“No. I just wanted to check in how you were.”, he said, feigning worry.
“Oh um.. thank you, I am fine- why? Is there something I should be worried about?”, you asked confused.
“I just thought after the whole thing with Swiss... y’know. That you might be hurt...” Oh satanas, it felt so incredibly good. Dewdrops eyes nearly rolled back into his skull as you very clearly took the bait.
“What thing with Swiss? Did something happen?” you were starting to grow worried and Dewdrop nearly laughed at how pathetic it was.
“Oh no... he didn’t tell you yet, then. I’m sorry, I just thought he would have told you by now. Seeing how you two are pretty serious now I assumed he did tell you.” He let out a dramatic sigh. “But I guess he will tell you when he’s ready.... I just hope that’s soon - wouldn’t want you to get into a relationship with him under false pretences, right?”
You eyes grew wide with confusion and worry and as Dewdrop decided to slowly turn around and act as if he was going to leave, you quickly grabbed his arm to make him stay.
“Please.” you breathed out “What is going on? What do you mean with ‘false pretences’?”
“It’s not my place to tell you. He should tell you himself. It is a pretty big thing after all.” Dewdrop knew he already had you. He was only trying to make this even worse once shit hit the fan. He had to make sure you would talk to Swiss about it, maybe even end things with him. Oh satanas, how priceless the look on his face would be. He’d deserve it.
“I’m begging you to please tell me what you mean.”, you anxiously begged the fire ghoul who sighed in return as if he was doing this against his will.
“I thought he trusted you enough to tell you himself but maybe he doesn’t quite yet. It’s only understandable given his past, of course.” You were eating everything up Dewdrop was saying. And the best thing was, he didn’t even need to lie. Didn’t need to make things up about the multi ghoul because it was all true. Dewdrop leaned against the wall next to him before starting;
“Swiss wasn’t actually summoned with the rest of the ghouls. Not many people know this because he worked in the shadows most of the time. I just saw him occasionally while I was still working with Terzo.” The words tasted bitter in his mouth. The hurt still there, still fresh. “He didn’t eat with the other ghouls, didn’t spend time with the other ghouls. It was like he was kept away from the rest of the clergy at all times. I always wondered what his job was. There are no ghouls in the clergy that serve no purpose, so I was curious. I, myself, only got to know the truth recently.”
It was true. Dew thought back to the evening that Swiss had confessed. He had never seen him cry like that before. Had always assumed Swiss had no baggage, no hurt inside of him. But that evening, Swiss had sobbed as he told his mates about his jobs before the band. Explained how he had done the dirty work, had killed siblings and ghouls alike. Without ever questioning anything. How he had been the perfect killer all along. The other ghouls had been taken aback and the following days - even if they didn’t mean to - they had avoided Swiss. Those days had wrecked the multi ghoul horribly, to the point where he didn’t leave his room, not even to eat.
In the end they managed to talk things out. Nobody was truly mad at Swiss or scared of him. For fucks sake, they all were ghouls. They had all killed before. They just hadn’t expected something like this from chill, laidback Swiss. Swiss hadn’t asked them to keep it a secret but given his reaction the first time he confessed, it was pretty clear he didn’t want anyone else to know. This is why Dew knew his plan would work. He knew it would absolutely obliterate Swiss to be confronted with this part of his past again, especially if it came from you.
“Well it seems-... oh, I really don’t know if I should tell you this. You’re gonna be hurt.”, Dew tried to sow worries and it worked. “I need to know.”, came from you in almost a whisper.
“Well, there were certain ghouls that... did the clergy’s dirty work. I mean, it only makes sense to summon ghouls to do it, don’t get me wrong. And it just so happened to be our dear Swiss.”
“Dirty work?”, you asked, more in disbelieve than in not-understanding.
“Getting rid of unwanted people. Outside and inside the clergy. The perfect killer. Ghouls leave no traces behind as you know. Swiss does have some chompers on him, I will not lie...”
You gasped and Dew watched carefully as you stared in disbelieve. “But don’t worry. He would never hurt you!” Dew hesitated for a bit. “Probably, anyways. What do they say again; you can take the ghoul out of hell but you can’t take hell out of the ghoul?” He faked a laugh at the lame joke. A real smile crept on his lips as he watched you stare into space with furrowed brows, clearly worried about what you had just learned about your lover.
Dew knew he had to make the finale count, so he faked a worried face as he gently grabbed your shoulder. “I do need you to be careful though. Swiss was dangerous in the past, following orders blindly just because he was told to. He killed ghouls and siblings, some of which he worked with. He had no morales. I’m just confused that he hasn’t told you about this yet... I’m worried about what that means. He is a ghoul. You can’t forget that. A demon from the pit, summoned to fulfill a task.” Dewdrop stood taller as his hand fell off your shoulder. “He’s in the band now but we can’t be sure he isn’t still following some of his former orders.” That was the only lie. Swiss had promised that he had been released from that position ages ago, had sworn to his mates that he was telling the truth. And Dew knew it had been the truth... but you didn’t need to know that.
The guitarist left you standing in the hallways, your eyes shimmering with unshed tears of disbelief and sadness.
-
That evening Dewdrop sat in the common room. He listened to the muffled voices behind Swiss’ bedroom door. You two had been talking - arguing - for close to two hours. Dew was the only one left sitting there, all the other ghouls had left at one point, the atmosphere in the den too suffocating to bear.
When you had stumbled into their den a few hours ago, your energy had immidiately alerted all the ghouls. They had raised their heads as they watched you walk into the common area. Swiss was the first to approach you - of course he was. The energy you gave off must’ve been excruciating for the multi ghoul. The fire ghoul still felt the anger deep in his chest, barely any less than before. He wasn’t like Swiss, he didn’t forgive that easily. And Swiss deserved this. Deserved to be hurt just how Dewdrop had been hurt.
The multi ghoul knew something was off, so he lead you into his room without a word. You hesitated for a bit, worried. And Dew almost smirked as he watched you stand in the doorway of Swiss’ room. You looked back over your shoulder to the small ghoul.
-
You entered your lover’s room, closing the door behind yourself gently. The multi ghoul approached you slowly, gently reaching for your hands, encouraging you to tell him what was wrong. But as his hands brushed yours, a jolt rushed through you. Not a jolt of excitement, lust or happiness. No, this felt different. This was fear.
Hurt flashed across Swiss’s face as you moved your hands away from his reaching ones. And as you took a step back to increase the distance between your bodies, he felt like he would die right then and there.
“What’s going on, sweet cheeks?”, the taller ghoul asked, concern lacing his soft voice.
You didn’t speak for a second. Your head hung low, facing the floor, but Swiss could see the lines between your brows nontheless. His stomach twisted itself in knots as he just observed you for a second. Your hands were fidgeting with the hem of your shirt and your posture was defensive, closed-off. And the way you smelled - it felt like a punch to the gut to Swiss. Fear, concern, worry, hurt.
“You don’t have to tell me what’s wrong right now, but is there anything I can do to help y-” - “Why didn’t you tell me?”
Swiss was the one to take a step back this time. “What do you mean?”
“I deserved to know!” You raised your head and there were tears in your eyes. Not yet spilled but they were there and Swiss felt helpless.
“What are you talking about? Did I do something? Did you change your mind about... us?”
“No! I mean yes- no... I just-”, you stumbled through the words clumsily, not even knowing what exactly you were trying to say.
“When were you going to tell me you killed for the clergy?”
Swiss felt the breath being knocked out of him, his heart stopped for a second, a searing pain rushing through his chest before the organ stumbled into a rushed rhythm. His mouth hung open, his ears ringing. It was like his worst nightmare came true, and it was happening right now in front of him. He watched as the first tears fell and you whispered “So it’s true.”. The multi ghoul felt like he needed to throw up, his chest heaving and his tail erratic behind him.
Your eyes truly took him in then; The claws at his sides, the tail behind him, the grey skin, the tiniest peek of his fangs, the sharp ears and the golden eyes that shone through the slits of the silver mask. Those hands - those claws - that had caressed you many nights, had softly ran through your hair or across your skin, were the same ones that had the blood of so many people on them. His teeth, usually nipping you gently, had ripped out throats and limbs before. Had hurt and killed. murdered.
You swallowed thickly as a new wave of fear rushed through you. What were you doing? In the room alone with a killer and confronting him about it? If the things Dewdrop had said were true, then there was no way of knowing that he wouldn’t do it again. Your investigation in the library about those ‘special ghouls’ just before you got here, didn’t help either.
Swiss felt the instant shift from hurt to fear in you. He felt it deeply in his body and it itched at his insides. Satanas, he wanted to claw at himself, get rid of that feeling, rip it out from his insides.
He only recently had told the other ghouls about his past and the days following had been excruciating for him. It had created a rift in their relationship for a while. And even though everything seemed alright now, he knew they still thought about it from time to time. But they had been understanding, because they were also ghouls, because they had done similar things. He couldn’t expect the same understanding from you. A human.
Swiss watched your form shake as you cried silently and in that moment he wanted to die. He wanted to rush to Copias office and have himself be sent back to hell. Either by ritual or by a dagger to the heart.
As he started speaking, his own tears fell, his body rocking with sobs as he watched his relationship crumble in front of him.
-
Dew had felt a sick satisfaction as he listened carefully to what was being said. The two of you weren’t screaming at each other but the door did little to stop the fire ghoul from listening in on the conversation. The other ghouls sat strewn around the common room. Their own conversations had died down shortly after the smell of fear, hurt and sadness had crept through the cracks of the door.
The longer the argument went on the more suffocating the energy in the ghoul den got. Mountain had been the first to leave, excusing himself to his greenhouse to escape the all-consuming smell of a multi ghoul in distress. The girls had left together without a word. They didn’t need to say anything. Everyone knew.
One after another the rest of the ghouls left the den as the sounds of sobs grew louder from the bedroom. Phantom had scurried after the girls. Being a quintessence ghoul meant he felt everything even harsher than the other ghouls. And he couldn’t take it. Rain took his leave a little later after he couldn’t bear hearing Swiss cry anymore. It hurt too badly to stay.
The anger Dew had felt until just minutes ago was almost non-existent now. Instead, the ugly grasps of guilt had a tright grip on him, threatening to pull him under and drown him in it. He tried to tell himself that Swiss deserved it. That he didn’t do anything wrong. You did deserve to know what Swiss was, after all. But Dew knew it had not been his place to tell you. And not in the way he did. Using you to get a reaction out of Swiss. To manipulate you into thinking a certain way about the multi ghoul. His chest felt heavy with guilt, suffocating him from the inside.
He didn’t blame the other ghouls for leaving the den. The atmosphere was devastating. The smell of distress thick in the air. This was even worse than when Swiss had come clean with them a few weeks prior. And suddenly Dew wasn’t so sure what this would do to Swiss. He had been a wreck last time, there was no way of knowing what would happen this time.
Aether was the last to leave. He sighed as he got up from the sofa, turning to leave the den like the others had before turning back to Dewdrop with a snarl. It was so entirely unlike Aether, that Dew felt himself recoil at the gesture.
“You told them, didn’t you?”, he asked, disappointment in his eyes. Dew didn’t say anything but that was answer enough for the quintessence ghoul.
“You’ve said fucked up things before, Dewdrop. But this was a real low blow, even for you.”
And with that, Aether left the den without looking back at the fire ghoul still sitting on the couch. Dew’s own eyes stung with tears as he felt everything he had done crashing down on him. The tears didn’t fall though, because before they could, the door to Swiss’s room opened.
Your still crying form walked through the door and into the direction of the den’s exit. Swiss followed slowly, not daring to be too close to you. He stopped in the middle of the common room and watched with heavy sobs as you closed the door behind yourself. His eyes were transfixed on the door as if he was waiting for you to open it again. Open it and run back to him, leap into his arms and hug him, kiss him. Telling him everything was going to be alright.
But the door never opened.
Swiss turned to Dewdrop and when their eyes met, the fire ghoul felt like he was being pulled down into the pit. He had never, not even then, seen Swiss like this. Completely and utterly gone. Dew waited for Swiss to snap at him. To launch himself at the smaller ghoul and rip him to pieces. He wouldn’t have fighted back, he would’ve let it happen. He knew what he did was not excusable.
But the attack never came. Instead there was a shaky breath from the multi ghoul as he mustered up a bitter smile. “I hope you got what you wanted, firefly.”
He left the den as well. Where to, Dew didn’t know.
But the feeling in his stomach was so incredibly painful, he didn’t dare to move off the couch. And Dew had never hated himself more than in that moment.
cw : mention of sh ideation, major character death
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*♡♡♡*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
There's a nice dock that sits at the entrance to the nearby lake that bordered the Ministries property. It was a hot spot for siblings and ghouls alike, especially popular amongst the water ghouls, fresh and salt water alike.
Dewdrop, newly transitioned, thought he could find solace in the lake. Especially since it was his favorite spot to visit to clear his mind.
Ever since Papa Terzo died and half the pack was subsequently killed, especially with his forced elemental change, he only found grief in the lake.
Today wasn't any different, as his legs dangled over the docks edge, the cold water lapping up his claves, the tide occasionally pushing against his knees. This place was vacant, it being February, the dead of winter. How ironic.
Call it an impulse move but, as he was reflecting on his grief and loss, and the immense body pain that never left, he wondered if he could end it all himself. He had looked at the thought from afar, eyeing it but not approaching, her siren like allure a trick. He knew that. At least; he thought he did.
So why did She look at him with such pity?
Pushing himself with his hands against the old wooden dock, he lowered himself into the freezing water and let the dark coldness take him.
dew is terrified of fire. odd for a fire ghoul, right? he wasn't always fire, his fear is rational, the fire took what he once was. he was once like rain, a gorgeous water ghoul, he was stunning. the fire took his fins, it took his gills, it took from him part of what made him who he was. he still has water ghoul traits, he still has scars from where his fins and gills once were, a now constant reminder of what was taken away from him. he fears the fire that burns inside of him, the new danger he now owns. it makes him so angry, so dangerous.
it took him a long time to accept that he is fire now, he's no longer one with the water, that he will never be water again.
he for the longest time saw rain merely as a replacement, something to be jealous of. rain has what dew wants back. rain is the gorgeous siren that dew one was, rain took his place on bass, rain gets so much attention for how gorgeous he is. rain is the new pretty little water ghoul and dew doesn't like that.
it took so long for copia to convince dew that he wasn't being replaced, that he still has a place in the band and in his pack, that they still love him just as much. dew really struggled to accept the new him.
I saw an art on Twitter and I can't remember who post it but it was two Dewdrops, a water and a fire! It was so beautiful and made me think of Dewdrop angst. If there is water Dewdrop summoned through magic, how he used to be, and it looks to fire Dewdrop that other ghouls love water Dewdrop more... He is very fun and easy to hurt 🤭
Oohhh man. Yeah Dew is super easy to hurt. He spirals easily. And doesn't hide his insecurities well. I think two of him would be a nightmare for so many reasons. Not least of all the fact that it would make fire Dew spiral really really badly.
Thinking about this got me thinking about fire Dew and how even without another version of himself to contend with, he probably thinks his pack would like water Dew better.
I got a little carried away with angst Dew thoughts so they're going under a cut to save space.
Dew thinks about it when he's alone. At the end of bad days. After he's snapped at everyone to leave him alone and they've done it. It happens on tour mostly. There are places to go at the Abbey. He can go for a walk. Go visit Mist in the lake, or at the very least vanish into a dark silent room.
But on a tour bus? He can hear them. He's alone in his bunk. Knees drawn up to his chest. Phone playing the latest episode of whatever series he's watching. And when he takes his headphones off he can hear them. Laughing in one of thr lounges. Talking, playing cards. Swiss is plucking at a guitar. And Dew isn't there. He's here. He asked them to leave him alone.
So they did.
But water Dew would be with them. Water Dew didn't have outbursts. He never felt any emotion this strongly. Dew gets his aloofness from his past self. Sure, like Rain he could be distant. Hard to know if he didn't want to be. But at least he never snapped at anyone. Never singed the leaves of Mountains plants. Or melted the best fork on the bus just by holding it in his hand during a fit of overwhelm.
Water Dew was easy. Easier to like. Easier to be. If water Dew had stormed off, demanded to be alone, he wouldn't have been. Someone would have bullied their way into his bunk by now. Put their arm around him. Held him. But fire Dew? When he snaps everyone listens. Which is better in a lot of ways, less infantalizing. He gets what he wants, what he thinks he needs. But he knows it wears on them. He'll, it wears on him.
The way it rears up. The world too small his skin to tight. His own failures bouncing off of his skull begging to be let out. It's exhausting to live through. It can't be any better to be on the other side of it. To watch him shut down. And if they actually cared about it, they'd be here right? Standing outside of his drawn curtain. Checking in on him. He feels like the boy who cried wolf. Too many biting remarks. Too many "just leave me the fuck alone"'s and they're sick of it. They don't care.
He'll feel better after some sleep. Some food. After he reluctantly takes care of himself. He'll push it into the background when he stumbles out of bed in the morning and Mountain curls his arms around Dews shoulders and kisses him between the horns. When Cumulus settles into his lap to kiss him, tasting like green tea and honey. It will fizzle. Fade. He will feel, once again, like he is who he is supposed to be.
But right now? The sound of ruckus laughter cuts into his bunk and it feels like a twisted knife. A problem he can solve by sheepishly rejoining them. But he can't. Can't deal with the way they'll look at him. Better to just suffer. To put his headphones on and sleep it off. To isolate.
Water Dew was never allowed to isolate. Fire Dew can do whatever he wants. How liberating to be able to make these choices. To have everything he could ever want, and to run away from it , to spit in the face of it. To resent it.
He sleeps eventually. Always does. Drifting off to the sound of voices in the next room. But when he wakes he isn't alone. Aeon is next to him. Arms curled around Dews body. Breath huffing out over his horns. And Dews first instinct is to push him away. To shove until Aeon rolls out of bunk and onto the floor.
He doesn't want pity.
But Aeon pulls him tighter. Makes a noise in his sleep and Dew relents. It feels good to be held like this. And it isn't Aeon's fault for not knowing thr protocol. He doesn't know that he's supposed to ignore Dew when he gets like this, not yet. He'll learn. He'll disappear like the others have. But until then? Until Dew inevitably ruins this like he does everything else? He'll sink into it. Savor it. This fleeting comfort.
He drifts back off to sleep to the sound of Aeon mumbling into his hair.
