We all know autism is the "misses social queues" neurodivergency. But what is it when you calmly and clearly say to somebody "I don't want to talk about this. You're hurting me with this conversation and I'm telling you because you say you want me to talk to you more and get mad at me when I don't tell you things. This is a test and you're failing." And they keep talking?
Because that's so far past "not getting the social queues" it's straight up ignoring them. Is it just abuse? Or does this family member have a disorder that can be addressed?
I'd like to see them get help if possible. I'm not trying to villify any disorder; mental health solidarity.
They've also said stuff like "If you know something about me that I don't know that can help me you should say it!" But them already angry at me seems like a bad time to bring up BPD, given the black and white thinking thing would put the whole idea under the current mood?
They seem to straight up forget/try to gaslight things they or other people said.
They think they might be autistic but when mad they always look for deeper meanings in what people are saying. A hyperbolic example being: "you all hate me."
"Sounds like something someone who hates me would say."
(Hyperboly because laughing at it is what I got. It's actually more like "you're lying (about lovig me) because of you tell other people(close family) I [did something they absolutely did do that was harmful to the household]!")
But I think it might be BPD. Reading through the symptoms rings truer than anything else I've found so far. But the stories of peoples experiences with BPD family members often seem so much more... violent? Excessive? They don't seem like they are BPD enough if you compare to those stories. But mental stuff exists on spectrums.
Like do I just pretend to give them a personality quiz while asking them questions from a BPD screener and then give them the results if it comes back as highly likely? (Probably not, that's lying and screws up any foundation of trust.)
Anyway... even if nobody finds this and sends advice at least I got some of this out of my system.
