Been a while since my last update, mainly because I switched to every other week for PT and one of them got canceled, so I ended up with a 4-week break during appointments.
More dilating tips from my PT (as always, I don't know to what extent these are specific to me, I can't give you medical advice)
a little soreness for around half an hour after dilating is normal, but if the soreness lasts for several hours, that's a sign that you pushed a little too hard.
I was instructed to dilate 3-4 times a week. As a rule of thumb, if a given level (e.g. smallest size at 2 knuckles-length deep) is pretty easy and doesn't cause lasting soreness, progress to the next level next week.
A mirror is really helpful for seeing what you're doing. It's really hard to tell from feeling alone whether you're inserted at all, let alone how much! largely because...
The vaginal opening is often the most sensitive part for vaginismus patients, even though you haven't reached the actual pelvic floor muscles yet. So if it feels like just getting the tip inserted is really difficult and actually more painful than stretching the muscles once you're inside, that's not surprising! It's still worth trying to get a teeny bit of insertion and stretching from that point.
At the last appointment before that break, I brought in my own dilators and the PT used them on me (stretching side-to-side and down, starting with only around a fingertip-length inserted, as mentioned previously.) That was fairly difficult -- she went slowly and gently and narrated what she was doing, but pretty much any amount of stretching caused (mild-moderate) pain.
Doing it on myself at home was much easier, probably a combination of being in control of the motion and therefore better prepared for it + just being less tense. Over 4 weeks (and tbh I wasn't great about hitting the 3x/week target) I got fully comfortable with the smallest dilator. My hand getting tired of pushing was more of a limitation than any vaginal pain. (But none of this is very surprising, as I was already able to tolerate 1 finger / junior-tampon sized objects before starting PT.)
I tried size 2 once at home but gave up pretty quickly -- at least on my set, it's such a huge leap from size 1 to 2! I was nervous and that didn't help. I couldn't really get any insertion at all, and (see last bullet point above) it didn't feel like I was even reaching the muscles.
Then I had another appointment, at which I dilated with the PT watching. Used size 1 to warm up then tried size 2. I was at least able to get enough insertion that I could try to push it sideways/down without it just slipping off the vulva, but not really anything beyond that.
Another main takeaway from that is if I can tolerate a significant amount of the size 2 dilator, around 1/3 of the length, then the PT can do a more thorough manual exam to hopefully figure out whether my pelvic floor muscles are too strong vs. too weak (and just constantly tense because they'd be too weak when relaxed). That information would inform what else to try for treatment.
After dilating, she showed me how to use one of those stretchy resistance band things for the open-book stretch (you just hold the band in your hands so there's more resistance against opening your arms/chest up) and for diaphragmatic breathing (you wrap it around your chest under the bottom rib so there's more resistance on your diaphragm).
She also tested my breathing with me lying down and her pushing on my diaphragm, one side at a time. Apparently my left side is tighter than my right, it was much more difficult on that side!
A vaginal dilator is a plastic or silicone rod and is typically tapered towards the end. Dilators can help train your vaginal muscles to relax if you experience pain during penetration. Please consult a physician if you experience pain. Some therapists will suggest use of a dilator kit ranging in sizes from small to large.
So after I wrote that last Paul fic involving vaginismus, I got quite a few messages saying how much it meant to some of you and I just want to say how much it warms my heart to bring others joy or comfort through my writing. Like I’ve been telling a lot of you, fan fictions are amazing. I love them. But they’re not always realistic, and that can be damaging to people who think sex is supposed to go a certain way and then blame themselves when it’s not like that. We’re all different, and everyone deserves to have a partner that cares about your well-being and pleasure. Don’t settle for less.
Seth Clearwater x vaginismus!reader smut
(Seth is 18+ in this)
Being with Seth Clearwater was, in a word, magical. He truly was the best boyfriend you could ever ask for. He was always there for you when you were upset or having anxiety, always made you smile and laugh, got you cute little presents or sometimes cool rocks that he found on patrol, and was super physically affectionate. Hugs, kisses, cuddles, hickeys, hand-holding. Y’all were the poster children for PDA. It made you nervous when you first started dating, because you thought he would want to get intimate right away. You knew that if you told him you didn’t want to have sex right away, he would be more than understanding. That’s just the kind of person he was. But you feared that holding off on intimacy would damage your relationship. Seth’s love language was physical touch. Yours was too, so stopping things every time it got too heated was a big roadblock in the relationship. Or so you thought.
The day came where you had to tell Seth about your vaginismus. He had asked tons of questions before letting you know how he felt about it all. What causes it? What does it feel like? How does the physical therapy work? Is there anything I can do to help? Once you explained the logistics of it all, you guys could start to be more open and honest about what you were comfortable with doing. It turns out, he thought you just didn’t want to be intimate with him. He thought you were only sticking around because of the imprint bond. Once you explained that yes, you definitely really really want to have sex with him, you just can’t right now, he was all smiles and wanted to try all kinds of stuff that didn’t involve penetration. You guys would have super open conversations about what he could and couldn’t do to you, and started experimenting with the things you were comfortable with. Let’s just say, Seth became an absolute master in the art of oral sex. For a while, it was all he could do, so he did it. A lot. I mean, you’d have to physically pull him away sometimes when it got too sensitive. He loved knowing that he could make you feel so much pleasure. It made him feel needed. Wanted. And of course you returned the favor.
You guys definitely have the foreplay routine down pat. Seth was almost always there when it came time for you to dilate every day. He would sit next to you, hold your hand, kiss you, or just talk to you about his day. Whatever you wanted, and whatever would distract you. He was so supportive, that when the day finally came that you wanted to try having penetrative sex with him, he said no. He didn’t think you had been using the biggest dilator long enough. What if he hurt you? What if you just didn’t like it? What if what if what if…..
But you had been waiting long enough. His support honestly turned you on. Every day when he would sit there while you did your therapy, you wanted to jump his bones for being so. Damn. sweet. No guy had ever cared about you to the point of withholding from sex for you. They always just let you put up with the pain. Not Seth.
“But baby, what if it hurts you?” he voiced.
“Then we can stop and try again another time.”
“But what if-”
“Seth,” you cut him off. “I know my body. Believe me, I’ve had to pay attention to it every day for the past year and a half while I did my exercises. I’m ready. If you don’t want to, that’s fine, but don’t say no because of me. I want to try.” You sounded so soft and adorable while you said the last part that he nearly melted through the floor. Here he was, with the most beautiful girl on the planet all but begging him to have sex with her, and he was hesitating. That’s what love made you do.
“Ok, we can try. But you have to promise, I mean really promise, that the second it starts to feel anything but good, you’ll tell me.” His voice was laced with concern.
“I promise,” you said with so much confidence that he had to believe you.
“Alright. So we’re doing this. Did you want to… try it like, now?” The poor boy was a blushing mess right now. You just nodded your head and smiled. “Okay. Cool. Yeah, that’s cool. We can do it now. I’m totally down with that.” You knew based off of the way he was acting that you were going to have to make the first move, so you walked up, grabbed his face between your hands, and kissed him.
He seemed stiff, so you pulled away and said, “Everything ok?”
“Yeah! Yeah, yeah. Everything is perfect. I just… do you want to go to my room?” Again, you just nodded, and let him take your hand and lead you into his bedroom, closing the door behind you guys. Jeez, he seemed more nervous than you were. You sat down on the middle of his bed, and reached your arms out and did grabby-hands until he laughed and joined you, lying you down and hovering over you. He kissed you sweetly, giving you every opportunity to say stop. You didn’t, but instead threaded your fingers up through his inky hair and pulled him closer to you. He took this as a green light to deepen the kiss, and brush his tongue up against your own. You guys continued kissing for a while since this was comfortable territory for you both. He eventually started moving his hands under your shirt, first massaging your stomach with his thumb and then moving up. He pulled back from you suddenly, eyes wide. “No bra?”
“Nope. I didn’t want anything to get in the way today,” you smirked and slid your hands over his shoulders. He had a look of awe on his face as he pulled the hem of your shirt up. You sat up and took it off, throwing it to the floor. Okay, yeah, so you were eager. You’d never enjoyed sex before and you thought you actually might for the first time. It was exciting.
As you laid back down, his eyes never left yours. He came back down for another kiss before trailing his mouth down your jaw, suckling at your neck for a few minutes before it was covered in faint red marks, and moved down to your breasts. Seth had always worshipped your chest. It was one of his favorite parts of your body. The size, the shape, the feel, were all beyond perfect to him. You gasped as he took a nipple into his mouth, your back arching up into him. He brought his hand up to massage your other breast while his tongue continued swirling around the first one. You closed your eyes and tipped your head back, just relaxing into the feeling and letting your muscles be at ease. He sat up for a second, which was far too long, to take his shirt off, and you opened your eyes to admire his sculpted body. You would have loved him even if he wasn’t a shapeshifting beast, but damn, the muscles that came with were such a nice bonus. And they weren’t just for show. You never told him this, but whenever he picked you up so easily or carried you around or pushed you up against a wall, you got beyond turned on. You always wondered what it would be like to have him actually get rough with you, but that would be for another time.
Once Seth thought your boobs had been shown enough attention, he slid his hand back down to your stomach, and then lower. He fiddled with the waistband of your jeans before popping the button at the front and dragging the zipper down torturously slow. You felt so hot at this point that you thought you would climb out of your skin if he didn’t touch you properly soon. You raised your hips in a silent signal for him to take them off, but he was too distracted by the feeling of your soft skin to notice.
“Seth,” you whispered. He looked up at you, hand already stilling in case you wanted to stop.
“What’s wrong?” he panicked.
“Nothing is wrong. Can you help me take these off?” His eyes widened at this, and then he smiled. He sat up on his knees, gripping the waistband of your jeans on either side of you, and you raised your hips as he pulled them down slowly, admiring your legs as each inch of them was revealed. His breath caught in his throat as he took in the lacey g-string you were wearing, which you had bought specially for this moment. You never really cared about wearing cute underwear before since it would always end up on the floor anyways, but this was a big day. At least you hoped it would be. So you wanted to wear something cute, and boy did Seth appreciate it.
Once your jeans were all the way off, he gave a low whistle and said, “damn. My girlfriend is the most beautiful woman alive. How did I get so lucky?”
You hit his shoulder and looked away blushing at this. And then… oh, then.
Your sexy werewolf boyfriend lay down on his stomach in between your thighs, lifting your legs onto his shoulders, and gave you a smirk that could only be described as savagely canine. He kissed the insides of your thighs, nipping here and there before soothing with his tongue, inching closer and closer to where you really wanted him to be. He liked to take his time with this part. He flattened his tongue and gave your center a broad lick over your panties, eliciting a small gasp. He did this several more times until your hips were writhing and grinding, desperate for more friction. He reached under you, gripping the fabric of your underwear before all but ripping them off you.
“Hey, easy. Those were expensive,” you haphazardly pointed, too lost in the moment to really care.
“I’ll buy you new ones,” he spoke lowly into your center right before diving in and wrapping his lips around you, sucking and kneading with his tongue. You gave a small moan, fingers once again tangling in his hair. He kept this up, alternating between firm licks and small sucks, his tongue constantly flicking that perfect spot. Seth heard in Paul’s head through the mind link once that porn wasn’t accurate at all to what women actually got off on. You were supposed to pick 2, maybe 3 key moves and do those until she was close, and then just keep doing exactly that until she came. Women are about consistency and rhythm, so if you change it up, they have to start all over. This advice had not failed him yet. Had not failed either of you, and you could have kissed Paul if you found out that that’s where Seth had gotten this tip. Fifteen delicious minutes later and you were teetering on the edge. You used to be insecure about how long you took to finish, but Seth had always reassured you that he just wanted you to feel good, and he would spend all day between your legs if he could. You were right there, legs shaking and eyes screwed shut, but couldn’t quite get that knot in your stomach to unravel. Seth pulled away, sensing your impatience, and knew you needed a little push. He got up and opened your bedside table, pulling out the large bottle of lube that you used for dilating, slathering his middle finger in it, and laid back down between your legs.
You knew what he was going to do, and trusted him enough to be careful, so you lie back and relax, knowing he would get you there no matter what. He dove back in with his lips, tongue flicking and rubbing for another few seconds before positioning his finger at your entrance, swirling it around to distribute the lube. He looked up at you, knowing you liked to guide his hand at first to make sure you were comfortable. You grabbed his hand, sliding his finger in slowly, inch by inch. You were pretty worked up at this point, so it didn’t take very long before his finger way fully inside you. He stilled his hand, waiting for you to give the all-clear, still sucking at your clit like a starving man. You tugged at his hair, shifting your hips against his hand, which he knew to be the cue to start moving. You didn’t much like the in-out feeling of being fingered. You preferred the pressure of him pressing on certain spots. He twisted his finger slowly so that his palm was facing upward, and began to stroke your top wall, making you shudder.
This was going to push you over that edge. Several minutes of consistency, pressure, and suction had you cumming hard, grinding on his face and moaning his name loudly. When you came down, Seth was still going, though more gently since he knew how sensitive you got post-orgasm. You had to whine and tug on his hair to get him to take his mouth off you, his finger stilling but remaining inside.
“Wow,” you breathed, eyes closed in a haze.
“Wow yourself, Gorgeous,” he winked at you. You made a move to reach down and grab him through his sweatpants, but Seth was quick to pull your hand away. “This is about you tonight,” he said with total sincerity. You wanted to argue that it was about both of you, but you knew he had his mind set on taking care of you, so you decided to let him. “You ready to try, baby?”
“Hell yes,” you laughed, sitting up. “Maybe I could start on top? That’s how I dilate and I could control it better that way.”
“I was just about to say the same thing,” he teased back. He moved to lie back against the headboard after taking his pants off as you kneeled on the edge of the bed, grabbing the bottle of lube. While you were turned away from him, he brought his hand to a cheeky slap on your ass, catching you by surprise.
“Hey!” You squealed and then giggled, turning to give him a playful glare.
“I couldn’t resist! It was right there,” He said, holding his hands up in surrender.
You simply rolled your eyes at this, grabbing a condom from the bedside table as well. You turned to him, still kneeling, and handed him the condom, which he ripped open with his teeth (and it was so hot). He slowly rolled it onto his rock hard dick, keeping a hand around the base as he looked up at you. “You absolutely sure about this?” he questioned.
“Yes Seth. I really want to.”
With this, you climbed up to straddle his lap, squirting generous amounts of lube onto him and spreading it around with your hand. You knelt up, positioning him at your entrance after throwing the lube on the floor. He sat straight up, hands going around your waist, one reaching up behind you to cradle your head. He gave you a passionate kiss as you lowered slightly, letting the tip of him find its way in. You stopped here, doing some deep breathing as Seth stared intently at your face, looking for any signs of discomfort. Seth was slightly smaller than your largest dilator, but what had you slightly concerned was the friction. The in-out-in-out factor usually caused you pain when you tried bouncing on your dilators. You would just have to keep the lube on stand-by and remember to breathe with your stomach.
When you were sure you would be ok, you lowered more, sinking down an inch with every exhale. Seth lovingly rubbed your back, hand petting your hair as he waited patiently for you to adjust. You felt unbelievable around him, but he didn’t want to express too much pleasure, fearful that you would put up with any pain for his benefit. He settled for nuzzling his nose into the crook of your neck, holding you as close as he physically could. You lightly scratched at his shoulders, holding on for dear life. You had to stop for a moment at the half-way point, trying your best to control your pelvic muscles and picturing a flower bud opening in your mind. Slowly, you lowered another inch, and then another, and another, until you could feel his thighs touch you. At this, you sat down fully on his lap, his cock sheathed fully inside of you.
I need a minute you thought. This was a lot. Silicone dilators were one thing, but to have your boyfriend inside you like this was completely different. He was warm, hot even, and you could feel his pulse, feel the throb in his veins. The twitch of him deep inside you.
“Fuck,” Seth gasped quietly, as if he didn’t want you to hear.
“Feels good?” you questioned.
“Mm-hmm. Are you okay?” He asked right back, face still buried in your neck.
“I think so. Just give me a second.”
“Take all the time you need, baby. Do you want me to touch you?” His hand came over from your back and he grazed your lower stomach with his knuckles.
“No. Too much,” was all the answer he needed before he wrapped his arm around your back once again, massaging your skin soothingly. This was going on too long, you thought. Seth was probably dying right now. You didn’t want him to suffer, so you lifted your hips a couple inches, sinking back down on him. You felt a stinging sensation at your entrance, but ignored it. Before you could lift your hips again, Seth grabbed your waist in a vice-like grip, still holding you against him but stopping all movement.
“Don’t you dare,” he spoke softly yet firmly. “I can feel how tense your muscles are right now. Relax and then you can try again.” You wanted to cry at this. He was getting frustrated. He was going to break up with you! But you silenced those negative comments and realized he was right. So you took some deep breaths again, focusing on the pressure of his tip deep in your walls, the feel of his fingers grazing your back, his other hand playing with your hair. You closed your eyes and focused only on the sensations. “There you go, Sweetheart,” he said as he felt you relax around him. Instead of going straight up and down this time, you ground your hips against his, making circles on top of him. And it felt… good? Jesus. For the first time in your life, sex wasn’t hurting. It still felt a little tight and stiff, but it didn’t hurt. So you kept at it. Your breathing picked up at the sensation, along with the exertion of kneeling for so long. Seth pulled his face out of your neck and used the hand that was petting your hair to pull you into a passionate kiss. You guys made out as you continued to circle your hips, both of your breathing labored. Seth gripped your ass in one of his hands, helping control your movements as your legs began to shake.
“You getting tired, baby?” he questioned, even though he could see that you were. You just nodded, slowing down a little. “Do you want to try a different position? Maybe one where I could do some work?” You wanted to, but were nervous. The trust you had for Seth was absolute, but what other position could work?
“Like what?” you questioned hesitantly.
He thought for a moment, hands stilling your hips, before he cracked a smile. “I have an idea. Here,” he spoke as he shifted you both further down the bed and laid back so he was flat on his back, you still on top of him. He brought you down so you were stomach to stomach, hands going to the small of your back, and planted his feet on the bed. He held you close as he lightly thrusted up into you.
“Oh,” you breathed a moan. This felt really good. Being on top and controlling the movement had been good to adjust, but having Seth fuck up into you like this was another level of pleasure. He barely thrusted, but still hit the right spots. And you could still easily lift your hips to pull away if it started to hurt.
“Good?” he whispered.
“Mm-hmm. Oh my God,” you whispered to yourself, reaching up with one hand to grab the headboard. You thought you heard him breath a laugh, but were too lost in the moment to pay much attention to anything but Seth’s movements. He kept a steady pace of small thrusts, going slowly, never questioning the pace or pushing your limits. After a while, you started to push your hips back against his as he went into you.
“You want to try going a little faster, Sweetheart?” he questioned gently.
“Yes,” you said with half-lidded eyes as you looked right into Seth’s coffee-colored irises.
He brought himself out a little further at this, pushing back into you slightly faster than before, and hitting that perfect soft spot inside you that had your toes curl. You released a real moan this time, and Seth swore he could have cum from that sound alone. He kept this pace up, not daring to go any faster since you both were already enjoying it so much and he didn’t want to risk ruining the moment with pain. For the first time in your life, you felt actual pleasure from penetration, and you wanted more. You wanted to cum, and you felt like you actually could. With this realization, you brought one of your hands down to your swollen clit, rubbing tight circles on it that had your moans go up in pitch.
Seth grabbed your hand, putting it back on his chest as he reached down and began rubbing you with his own fingers and cockily stating, “That’s my job.” You felt your eyes roll back in your head at this, and it was the hottest thing Seth had ever seen. You felt a knot begin to form in your stomach, tightening faster than it ever had before. After just a couple more minutes of this, you moan “Oh, Seth. I think I’m gonna cum.” Of course this only spurred him on to keep going. Consistency, he reminded himself. Don’t change a thing. And he didn’t, not until you were seeing stars, trembling on top of him and screaming his name as your climax crashed into you like a wave. You had to rip his hand off your dripping center when the sensations became too much, and he stilled inside of you.
“Did you finish?” you questioned him once you came down, confused. If he had, it had sure been subtle.
“No, but I didn’t know if you were okay to keep going. You seem pretty sensitive right now.”
“Seth, I want you to cum too. Just… do you think you could like, not take a while? Like, could you finish in the next couple minutes? I’m okay now but I don’t want to push it.”
“Baby, I can finish in the next 30 seconds after looking at your face while you came like that.” You blushed deeply at this, breath picking back up again as he continued to gently thrust into you. He screwed his eyes shut after a couple thrusts, losing rhythm in his hips as he spilled into the condom with a growl and relaxed underneath you. “Fuck,” was all he said.
You laughed. “Yeah, fuck.”
He let you sit up and pull off of him at your own pace before dismounting and moving to walk to the bathroom.
“Wait! Wait,” he almost yelled, startling you half to death as he sat up, removed and tied off the condom, and hopped off the bed to throw it away. “This is the part where you let me clean you up and take care of you.”
“You just did take care of me, Seth,” which made him giggle.
“Not like that silly goose! Just stay there.” He joked as he made his way into the bathroom, coming out with a damp towel. “Spread ‘em,” he motioned towards your legs. You laughed deeply, obliging. He was ultra gentle as he wiped the lube off the insides of your thighs, kissing your knees as he finished. Then, he threw the towel into the hamper and retrieved his softest sweatshirt and placed it over your head as you moved your arms into the sleeves. “And now, we cuddle.” He looked so damn pleased with himself.
You laid your head on Seth’s warm chest, his arms coming to wrap around your waist. You two stayed like this for a while, just soaking in the details of what just happened. You did it. You had sex with your boyfriend. Actual penetrative sex, and it didn’t hurt.
As if reading your mind, Seth spoke. “I’m so proud of you.”
I know I have fellow parents on here, so let me please please stress the importance of respecting your children’s privacy - if their bedroom door is closed, you absolutely MUST knock on the door, and then, please hear me, WAIT until you clearly hear a “come in” type of response before opening the door. Then, when you’re done, exit and close the door again.
I say all of this for three reasons:
1) Your children are actual people and are entitled to their privacy and to assume that their privacy will be respected. Hopefully, you have been respecting this fact while raising them and have given them all of the tools you want them to be employing to make good choices. And you should therefore be able to demonstrate that trust that you place in them by respecting the trust they are placing in you.
2) Yes, you pay rent or mortgage, but your children didn’t get any choice in whether or not they were born or even, usually, the fact that they live in that house. You are their parent, not their owner, they are your child, not your pet. They are sapient and sentient people who live and live in your home through no active choice of their own, so the least you can fucking do is respect their humanity and refrain from abusing the unholy amount of power you wield in their lives.
3) Doing this while they are young will give you muscle memory should you ever, as an older adult, move in with your now-adult children and you see their door closed when you have something to say to them. There is even LESS excuse for not respecting their privacy in those circumstances.
Just KNOCK ON THE FUCKING DOOR AND WAIT FOR AN AFFIRMATIVE RESPONSE BEFORE YOU OPEN IT.
This rant brought to you by my step-mother who moved in with me in October walking right into my room with the most cursory knock without waiting for a response while I was dilating and naked from the waist down, necessitating a very awkward conversation about Zen and the Art of Neo-Vagina Maintenance and why I shoving a hard plastic stick up my twat, while also teaching me a very important lesson about apparently needing to lock my god damn door in my own home that I pay for.
So the dilators haven’t been going very well, it’s been two or three weeks now and I’m still on the first one..it’s very painful and really uncomfortable
dilating for the first time in my college dorm room and it burns like hell. I’m not sure if it’s because it’s been a few weeks or because I’m not used to the environment but oh my god I’m uncomfortable
So I thought that because I'm further along my journey, I will share with you some beginner dilating tips and steps that have helped me immensely! Materials: -Dilators (I bought my set from Vaginismus.com) -Your favorite lube (I highly recommend silicone based lube than water based- even coconut oil is a nice natural lubricant you can use) - Candy/favorite snack (if you eat something you enjoy before, during, or after dilating your mind will begin to associate the act of dilating with something positive!) - relaxing music/shows to distract you - a positive attitude! Tips: 1) Before you dilate you must relax your body and mind. The more stressed you are, the more tense your muscles will be, this includes your pelvic floor muscles. Therefore, I highly suggest before you whip the dilators out do activities to relax you. For me this includes taking a hot shower/bath, deep breathing and massages. 2) Once you are relaxed, get the dilator you are currently on and insert it slowly. If it begins to hurt don't go any further and only keep it to where you can tolerate it. Keep the current dilator inserted for at least 10 minutes. During this time I like to keep my mind off the dilator by distracting myself (watching YouTube videos, listening to music) 3) If you are comfortable with the current dilator (by comfortable I mean no pain and somewhat easy insertion) try moving onto the next one and keeping it inside (as far as you can get it) for at least 5 minutes. 4) if taking the dilator out is difficult for you (it was for me), try bearing down (as if you were pooping). This maneuver will open up your pelvic muscles and increase the size of the vaginal canal. 5) celebrate any progress you make cause you deserve it!