7 Things to Scream At and Cry With
Going through a breakup, separation or divorce causes a wellspring of emotions. There are contrasting swings too; one moment anger, then sadness. Bouts of hopelessness are followed by renewed confidence while regret can suddenly turn into regeneration.
Itās confusing and exhausting.
Here are 7 things capable, when those raw emotions strike, of taking our shouts and tears.
Steering Wheel (Scream At)
Something liberating about venting frustration, hurt and pain into a device we actually move to guide our direction. A break up will trigger anger but ultimately, we are in control as we āsteerā the wheel of our lives accordingly.Ā
We would move our car away from harm with the steering wheel and our future is no different.
We cannot control such feelings following a separation but we can choose what we do with them. How we express them will either point us towards or away from harm; let the anger come but it, under no circumstances, shall touch the wheel of your life.
My Recommendation: Do this in park, not while driving ā¦Ā
Dogs (Cry With)
Dogs show true unconditional love. They sit there with their tongues out and a paw on your arm. They know. They may not be able to speak but that doesnāt mean they canāt communicate.
My Recommendation: Donāt try this with a cat ā¦
Walls (Scream At)
The saying goes: āif these walls could talk.ā And I think that phrase comes from walls being such good listeners. They donāt fall when we stumble nor crack when we break.
My Recommendation: Donāt hit them. You will put a hole in the wall and break your hand and thus have two bills to pay.
Your Best Friend (Cry With)
There is another old saying: āa best friend will help you move a bodyā ⦠but sometimes that body in need of movement is ours. Allow a best friend to console but let them to encourage your future. Believe the good things they see in you are really there, regardless of the break up.
Get out and do something fun with them or serve your community, neighborhood or church. Chances are there is something you and your best friend have always wanted to do.
Now is the time.
My Recommendation: Be open to their dating advice, even if it might be terrible. Hug them and thank them.
Sappy Movies and Ice Cream (Cry With)
When watching The Notebook for the first time after a breakup and it gets to the incredible love making scene ⦠the one that begins on the dock in the rain and ends with them in the house?
Itās all perfect and here you are, disastrously single, in bed, licking mint chip off the spoon and feeling immensely unattractive ā¦
While we often criticize Hollywood for over hyping, I donāt think itās always the case. Action films and post-apocalyptic thrillers may border on the impossible but romance movies not so. The things we learn from the ending of our past relationships will help us create our next one - so to be as vivid as the silver screen passions weāre watching play out, saying āI wish that we me,ā while rustling our hands through a bag of Hot Fries.
It will happen again, junk food binge aside.
My Recommendation: Watch P.S. I Love You next.
Old Photos (Both)
They reflect and quite strikingly, a time when you both thought you would be happy forever. Looking at them may take us right back but try to stay in the present. With each photo, say goodbye to your ex but speak the same thing to your former self.Ā
We donāt have to be the person in those photographs anymore. This is prime time, as we discard the pictures, to acknowledge we were as responsible as our partner for the demise of the relationship.
Own it. Rip them up. And start becoming the new person you wish future cameras to capture.
My Recommendation: Some pictures will make you angry and others sad. Be prepared for the ebb and flow.
God (Both)Ā
Through the fallout of a broken relationship, if crying out to God seems compelling, natural, reassuring and appropriate, follow that feeling.Ā
Itās not an accident or a coincidence.
Itās as real as God is.