Saraan & Samuel: Taosavos
This is the text to the picture. It’ll appear in my fanfiction, however I don’t no yet when. ^^
This hug was not like the others that Saraan made him feel so often.
Suddenly Samuel was enveloped, no, swept away by a sea of emotions, like a raging storm on the high seas. Gentle, heavy, pure bliss, fear, endless joy, excitement, gnawing longing, a stab of jealousy, all these feelings and more suddenly took on colors, became something he did not even dare to describe in words. These impressions lasted only a few seconds and broke off, as Samuel, startled, tore himself away from Saraan and staggered backwards, almost falling to the ground.
"Wow, fuck, what was that?!" He gasped, so shocked that he forgot all manners.
Saraan looked at him with an insecure, guilty expression, but also in a determined way. "Taosavos." He replied calmly.
Samuel's face was a picture of shock, confusion and lack of understanding. He shook his head gently as a sign that he did not understand what Saraan was saying.
"Our bioelectric field surrounding us is stronger than that of any other species, as you know." Saraan explained, "We can send out a strong electric shock and keep an attacker at bay. But we can also use it to communicate our feelings to someone else."
"Communicate?" Samuel's voice was still subtly filled with excitement and uncertainty.
"Sharing emotions using our bioelectricity." Saraan saw that Samuel couldn't quite make out what he meant and smiled softly. "It's hard to explain, and when words can no longer describe what you feel, then..."
Samuel felt fear inside himself and so he stiffened a little, even wanted to retreat, which Saraan did not miss at all. So he stopped and did not come any closer to the elf at first.
"Please, let me show you. Do not be afraid."
Saraan seemed so serious and at the same time he seemed to be overcome with insecurity as he slowly reached out a hand and placed it on Samuel's chest. Astonishment and insecurity crept into the elf's inner being on quiet soles. Saraan sensed that he would probably have to grab Samuel at any moment, as the power of emotion would surely overtake him like a horde of eirochs, thundering and stomping across the plains of Kadara.
"I-I don't know, Saraan." Samuel, said in a slightly tremulous way, actually took a step back and looked at the angara, a look that revealed that deep, deep inside he feared what was coming.
It had something to do with very deep emotions and he was afraid of it. Damn, that had just been really intense and he didn't want to.... he didn't want to lose control. Saraan knew that.
"You, of all people, have trouble understanding this because you hide and suppress your feelings so much." The professor, who had so often had the opportunity to read in the other one, reasoned.
Samuel hesitated with an answer, then lowered his eyes and began to recite. "Show no emotions, feel no pain. They cloud your mind. Never hesitate, the other has chosen his path, you need to follow yours.” He whispered.
Another dogma which Thantos taught him, which he followed himself, which described the path of the adept and assassin he was. He was a human, living the religion, culture and assassination traditions of the drell, paired with fragments of the ancient Japanese way of life, still young and not so serious like his master, somehow existing in both worlds.
Saraan looked at the man in front of him who had suffered as much pain in his life as he had, maybe more, and who had not yet defeated his worst enemy and would never defeat him: himself. For emotions were his enemy. He wanted, he had to show him his affection. Maybe it would change him? Maybe it would help them both.
"You suffer. Always. The nightmares are a manifestation of your suffering." Saraan spoke calmly. Samuel just nodded.
Now Saraan caught up with him and put his hands on Samuel's shoulders, who lifted his gaze. Insecurity, even fear, lay within.
“Actually it is something very beautiful. You are...the first creature I have met that has such fear of emotions."
Saraan pulled him into his arms and pressed him gently against his chest. Samuel let it happen, what eased Saraan so much that he exhaled softly.
"Taosavos...is..." a whisper of the ocean deep, gentle, slightly distorted, exotic voice, a whisper that went over into the void, because what now followed made voice and word meaningless.
A warm storm came up and brought with it exactly what Samuel had just experienced in that fleeting moment of terror. He wanted to flee, stay, fight, surrender, didn't know what to do, felt helpless and only Saraan's body gave him stability, while the storm was raging, taking Samuel with it, into the highest heights, into the deepest abysses, making him stagger, suffocate, dizzy. Colors, whose names he did not know, buzzed inside him, twitched through his head, warmth and a deep, intimate tingling filled his entire body. Never, never had he felt such a thing and never would he have thought it possible that he would feel something like it.
He never noticed how he had clung tightly into Saraan's fabric top, how he trembled, how he panted heavily and finally embraced the angara, put his head against the broad chest, feeling Saraan hold him tight, who stayed still and gently transferred his bioelectricity into the other one's body, which was the medium to communicate his feelings.
"Sometimes even words can’t describe what we feel. So we share our feelings in our taosavos. This. This is...what I feel when you are with me. And when you are far from me." Saraan whispered in a somewhat brittle way and gently stroked the back of the elf.
Samuel suddenly gasped and tears welled up in his closed eyes, soon ran down his cheeks, while a smile of redemption, of pain and bliss shimmered on his lips.
thanks to adorable @myrddinderwydd for inventing such wonderful words and having that great blog!!!
