(1) My partner is transitioning. I knew things would change and I knew he would need support (which I have given, unending and unconditionally). I did not know how severely he would change. He isn't the same person I fell in love with.
“2) He is angry and sullen and rude. He withdraws. He has started to lose his temper. He blames me for everything. He just doesn’t seem to care anymore. I don’t know where this is coming from, and I’m tempted to blame the hormones. I’m starting to resent his transition, for taking the man I loved away from me. And I don’t know how to cope.”
This isn’t an effect from hormones. If his levels are low, he could be experiencing mood swings, and that could affect any mental health problems he might suffer from.
But there is also the aspect of transition that makes people more themselves. Your partner might just be this person. He might not know how to care for you in this time. He might be feeling too much stress to be able to give any kindness to anyone but himself.
Don’t excuse his behavior because you think it’s hormones. Try talking to him. Openly like this. Tell him that he has been different and you don’t feel this way because he is getting closer to feeling more authentic in his body. But because he has treated you differently.
Hope this helps. I’m sorry for the troubles you’re experiencing right now.