I am tired of people telling me how I should feel and labeling me with adjectives that I can't relate to or don't agree with.
By: Ezenwanyi
Published: Jun 4, 2021
I am tired of people telling me how I should feel and labeling me with adjectives that I can't relate to or don't agree with.
I am tired of others trying to seal my fate with their platitudes of oppression and trauma. I am tired of the manipulation and the mental acrobatics that people try to do to make me believe that I am or that my ethnicity is doomed and that the only way to be pulled out of this darkness is by white saviors and reparations.
I am tired of being thrust into victimhood that I did not choose. Or being forced to support people based on their skin color with no atom of thought being given to their character.
I am tired of being a poster child for pity. I am tired of people telling me that the past can never be forgiven and that grace can never be extended for atrocities that I never experienced and treatment that I never had to endure.
I am not oppressed. I never have been and by the grace of God, I never will be. I am tired of society beating this mindset into my brain.
I am tired of being told of the strikes I have against me. Being a woman and being black are not strikes but blessings. I am not at a disadvantage because I am either of these things.
I am tired of being reminded that my life matters. Why wouldn't it? I know it has. I know it does. I know it always will matter. Plastering it on every road, in every commercial, and every restaurant won't make it matter more.
All life matters. Everything that God touches matters.
My life is not more important than anyone else's because of my skin color or any past or present hardship that I face.
I've seen what real oppression looks like. I know what real oppression sounds like. I've smelled it even. I would be remiss to wear this badge of oppression that I don't deserve.
Why do people want to be victims so badly? Who wants to live a life where the tops of their lungs are always met with screams? Or where their hearts are met with the heaviness of harm and pain. Where they steep themselves in depression and angst?
Your invisible shackles are on too tight! They are cutting off the blood supply to your common sense. Release them. Release them so you can see that the only ally that will save you is you. The only way out is through.
Victory has much less baggage than victimhood.
I will not subscribe to the limiting beliefs that society is constantly trying to put on me. I have enough of my own. I am African not afflicted. I am black not burdened. I am anointed. I am blessed.
You can disagree with me because I am not one of those people that you must virtue signal to...
Some people will hear this and think well, she's African she can't relate to the struggle. Her ancestors weren't slaves. Her ancestors weren't maligned and red-lined. Her blood is not filled with trauma and suffering.
But my question to the naysayers is,
Out of everything you can take from your ancestors, why would you pick pain?
Why not all the progress they made? Why would you pick struggle? And not all the strides they took to free themselves from the physical and mental slavery they endured.
Why are you allowing agents of chaos to tell you how to feel? Why are you letting bad actors and manipulators keep you in a constant state of dis-ease?
There are people who benefit from chaos. There are people that will never bring solutions to the table because solutions are far less profitable than problems.. Solutions won’t line their pockets.
Every day these people remind us of how marginalized and disadvantaged we are. Do you ever wonder why they don't remind us of how far we've come? How much progress has been made?
Why don’t we ever question why people like Oprah, Lebron James, Megan Markle, Trevor Noah, Diddy, JayZ, Patrice Cullors, and many others - push this narrative of oppression when they themselves are great examples of black people who beat the odds they constantly complain about?
I need people to ask themselves, is it a white person keeping me from my greatness, or is it me? Are white people the reason that I didn't wake up on time?
Are white people the reason I didn't work out?
Are white people the reason why I was late to work?
Are white people the reason why I missed class?
Are white people the reason why I don't teach my child to read?
Are they the reason why I was unproductive?
Or why I chose not to be present in my child's life?
Why I chose to have several children with several men?
Or why I chose to sell drugs and poison my community?
Why I chose to not finish school?
Why I chose to not start that business?
Why I chose to plaster my genitals on the internet for money?
I mean c’mon.
If you're oppressed in America, it's because you choose to be.
If you're waiting for reparations to fill the gaping void left by your ego and entitlement, I'm sorry to tell you that it's going to take more than money to fill it.
Stop feeding into this narrative that has been written for you.
You are the author of your narrative. Not white people trying to impose their supremacy. Not black people trying to make up for all the privilege they supposedly lost or never had.
Real oppression doesn't raise $90m in one summer and has none of it go to communities that need it.
Real oppression doesn't get companies to rewrite their mission statements.
Real oppression doesn't get school curricula changed or history reimagined.
Real oppression doesn't buy multiple homes.
Real oppression doesn't let you do or say whatever you want.
Real oppression doesn't get government assistance.
Real oppression doesn't buy homes amongst the very white people they say they are oppressed by.
Real oppression doesn’t own their one tv network.
Real oppression doesn’t demand white people to cash app or Venmo them money for educating them on how everything is anti-black.
Every single one of us has every right to question how society chooses to place and define us. So why would you never question why society wants to mark you with oppression?
Why would you never want to question a society that doesn't hesitate to plaster black death on your TV screens every night? Are black people the only ones dying?
Why would you never question a society that perpetuates your victimhood? That dumbs down your grammar and math skills? That tells you that your individualism, critical thinking skills, emphasis on the scientific method, work ethic, aesthetic, and politeness aren't necessary because they are characteristics of whiteness? Why?
I watched a clip where a young man named King Randall said that BP should reduce their dependence on the government and on WP taking care of our communities. And instead, they should do for and take care of themselves. Roland Martin - an unnecessary fixture in black culture, in my opinion, had the audacity to ask him, why. Smh
Let me tell you something. In my first couple of episodes, I discussed breaking unhealthy patterns. I want to add another pattern that I plan on breaking - that I refuse to pass down to my children. I will not be telling my children that they have to work twice as hard. That they are at a disadvantage because of the color of their skin. That is “The Talk” I plan on having with my kids.
I will not prime them to believe that they are going to suffer from stumbling blocks that stem from white supremacy or their lack of privilege. I will not darken their doorstep or burden them with limiting beliefs of oppression and injustice.
I will simply tell them that success is not an entitlement. Progress is not a birthright. That their character will either open doors or close them. That no one can take their dignity away from them without their permission.
I will tell them to amass as many skills as they can. I will provide them with opportunities to act on their curiosity, facilitate conversations, question what needs to be questioned. I will not put the fear of oppression in them, but the fear of God.
Stay away from movements that affirm you in accepting defeat. Stay away from forces that only amplify trials with no mention of triumph.
I am not oppressed. My children will not be oppressed. I will not curse my life to perpetuate a false narrative. I will not renounce my God-given privilege.
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Link: Audio podcast
[ Yes, yes, just read around the “god” bits; they’re not the point. ]
Out of everything you can take from your ancestors, why would you pick pain?
Why not resilience? Why not determination? Why not gratitude for everything they fought for so that you wouldn’t have to?
If you genuinely think you’re oppressed, then you are the one erasing history. You’re saying that everything they went through accomplished literally nothing.
