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Tag 1663 / I abhor the atmosphere alcohol creates

#toxic #fakeemotions #antialcohol #Schmiermittel #schöntrinken #Volksdroge

fake memories?

there are people who live in the past and there are people who live in the present and there are people who live in the future. i thought i was someone who always lived in the present and future. that was because I didn't really remember or know the depth of past memories, experiences - which is quite ironic. but today, i saw a picture from the past that reminded me of the feelings i had towards a person a while ago. i cared for this person, i looked out for this person, i felt this person's pains and wanted to be of useful of help to this person. in actuality, i might have not done much. i mean at my age and with the amount of exposure we actually give to the world around us is so little, rarely people around us know and can physically help with another's pain. but to the extent i can hear this person's problems and dark secrets, I listened and felt pain. maybe it was a one-sided thing. at the moment, i didn't think it was. but fast forward to the present where this person acts totally different towards me. yes, time passed and we didn't talk during that time. and yes, a lot has probably happened to this person as well as me. but, to experience a type of confrontation that totally made me feel a different way towards this person makes me doubt whether the feelings i had towards this person in the past were real. it's really confusing. and hurtful. to even think that maybe it wasn't real? were we faking it? or were we just so immersed in the emotions at the time that we said certain things and confessed certain things.. idk.. but it's weird that tears still fall. even as i write this, they fall.. for reasons I dont know..

#friendships #friends #emotions #fakeemotions #reality #fantasy #memories