#fearful attachment

[sadgayloser420]

trying to be closer to others and accept intimacy is so frustrating. i want it so bad but whenever i feel the other person really loving me and openly trying to get closer to me i just fill with panic and dread and want them as far away from me as possible. it's such a tiring cycle i want to get OUT but i just freeze up and panic every time

[ravingxfxbrickxwall]

I am my father’s most competent son. I am my mother’s big strong man.

I am the eldest daughter

[batsguy]

fuck

[izzy-ikigai]

Me dealing with my emotional state while trying to buiild new friendships with really cool people but I'm the fearful attachment kinda gal and then the cute girl is saying nice things about me:

[ravingxfxbrickxwall]

Anyone else ever wonders what it would have been like if you met your bestfriend/partner/someone special earlier in your life? That maybe you could have prevented the bad things from happening to them?

Yes, it’s not a healthy thought but they didn’t deserve what happened. All we can do is hope the future is better and kinder, but that what if still lingers

[laestoica]

[rosyuenseo149]

Family therapy can help with relationship difficulties, depression, anxiety & physical illness. Ros Yuen can help you overcome these difficulties. Call now!

Family therapy can help with relationship difficulties, depression, anxiety & physical illness. Ros Yuen can help you overcome these difficulties. Call now!

[sarahfasha]

Fuck it up Scorpio Full Moon

When I tried to assert my boundaries, ask for my needs to be met, & explain why I am the way I am - it was all fine at first. 

& then the Scorpio Full Moon hit. I was told I am a hypocrite. & he just dug his heels in even more when I cried for reassurance & the validation I needed to feel safe.

He said his needs weren’t being met & that I never listen to him (I do, and have been making a valid effort but that is his perception unjustified or just he will believe what he wants) which honestly may seem like it but it is my belief that it is because I’m a chatterbox. 

If you put me in a room with someone who doesn’t speak much & when I do ask them to speak up more & they still shy away from speaking then I’m not really sure it is an honest assertion to say I don’t listen (bc they choose to not speak much) because of the willful imbalance in our conversations, even when i try to pry it out of the other party. I do try to focus on the other persons issue in the only ways I know how & yes that is by trying to figure out the core of the issue, which sometimes entails astrology, tarot or psychology. I’m sorry that’s all I know how to do. I’ve always been that friend that wants to help resolve an issue, not just listen. I’m not a therapist. 

In any case, I have always been too generous, too kind, with weak boundaries (Libra rising, Moon Trine Jupiter). I have tried to communicate my attachment styles in relationships to make the other person understand why I am the way I am & even tried to figure out his. I thought that is what we do? Talk about past traumas to help & understand each other. 

All I can say, is never in my life have i been told I was a hypocrite & that I don’t care when it comes to one on one relationships. Never. It was only when I asked for my needs to be met was I told I was selfish. I have never been told I was selfish in my romantic relationships because I never asked for my needs to be satisfied fully & completely in order to feel secure & loved. If anything, I was too selfless, let too much shit slide. 

So is it the Scorpio full moon telling me how he really feels? Or just a bump in the road & perhaps taking stress out on me from other things. & by no means am I saying I’m perfect, I am saying I tried so hard to communicate my needs desperately & was made to feel like, oh, this is why I don’t even try, I remember now. Back to no one ever understanding me. 

I don’t want to even talk about the things I enjoy anymore. I don’t want to go deep anymore. I’ll play over here in the kiddie pool with arm floaties on where it is safe.