#ff shitpost

[ice-arena-meltdown]

Headcanon #idk, 9? Let's say 9.

Coffee sings "Cup of Roasted/Poisoned Coffee" from The Guy who Didn't Like Musicals as he goes about his restaurant/café duties. He unironically likes this musical, low-key mostly because of Beanies, and you better believe he hams it tf up for "Poisoned Coffee."

Chocolate sometiems plays the role of Mr. Business and harmonizes with his boyfirend, because he is... the latte hottay.

Bonus: Black Tea barges in sometimes shouting "WHAT IS THIS?! A WHOLE 'NOTHER A-SECTION???" with Milk standing behind her, hands forming a heart where they rest on her hip. Yeah, that's right; if she wanted to be in a musical, she could be in a damn musical. She'd kill it in Brigadoon.

(I actually do think she would do well in Brigadoon ._. I mean, she's canonically this etherial sea spirit who comes and goes in the cold ocean mist, if Pirate's stories from the Balcony / VIP Room are to be believed, and you can't tell me that the modern UK and teas don't go hand in hand. So... consider this a bonus headcanon.)

Tiramisú is on vocal rest. I said she's on v— damnit, Emma.

[reference video for all my fellow Food Fantasy fans who didn't sign up for this Starkid nonsense:]

[zebyzeee]

[tiszy]

Had my friend download food fantasy

[breezeinmonochromenight]

Genesis Rhapsodos sounds like a try hard name someone gives their oc. What if that's actually the case and Genesis' real name is something like John and he changed it when he got in SOLDIER and everyone just went along with it (it's been years since I played CC so idk if my memory still hold up but let's just pretend Hollander went with it too and changed the names in the documents too)

Makes sense but at the same time... like... [gestures to like 95% of the Final Fantasy roster including gems like Sephiroth, Eald'narche, Y'shtola, Exdeath, Cloud, Laguna Loire, etc.]

[breezeinmonochromenight]

Genesis' sword bothers me so much. His sword looks more like a saber or cutlass instead of a rapier. HIS SWORD ISN'T A RAPIER WHY DID HE NAME HIS SWORD RA-

Djsjfjsjfjd lmao and it’s typically classified as a broadsword too, so my best/most educated guess is that it’s named Rapier because the hilt is pretty close to a traditional rapier hilt.

That’s so bizarrely contradictory tho, since a broadsword is practically the polar opposite in definition/utility compared to a rapier. Maybe there’s an inside joke there that never made it to game or something — tho Gen doesn’t strike me as the type of character to like... name his sword after a joke... but yeah.

That being said: If this bothers you, you might not want to look up rapier-style weapons on the ff wiki. They use that term very loosely to describe a wide variety of weapons that I wouldn’t ever even remotely consider a rapier and it’s really confusing lol.

[breezeinmonochromenight]

In your opinion, if a DMC character and a Final Fantasy character were to meet, which would be the most horribly chaotic combination?

DMC3!Vergil (or: Vergil reaching peak Vergil) and Insane!Sephiroth

DMC5!Vergil or V and Genesis Rhapsodos (this one has most potential for causing trouble/general mayhem)

DMC4!Nero, Squall, and FF7!Cloud (not necessarily chaotic but still a brooding disaster)

DMC3!Dante and the Chocobros or DMC5!Dante and the older Chocobros (this one probably has the most potential for absolute chaos)

[namiargentum]

Found Gladio on sale. Knew he was a cheap ass hoe😂

[breezeinmonochromenight]

Japan DFFOO: it’s summer festival time! We’re doing multiple free weapon draws every day + adding free daily draws for your faves that you may have missed + practically giving away Lightning/Cloud/Squall’s starter weapons + armor away and putting up multiple bonus boards for materials!

Global DFFOO: