#fragmentedforrest

[fragmentedforrest]

You stared at me that day without judgement,

“I mean,” I told you,

“I know.” You said.

And you love me anyways

[fragmentedforrest]

I hate when you leave

I mean, I know you’re coming back

After work

Seven hours from now,

Feels so far away

And so begins another day with seven hours spent

Thinking about all the things I miss about you

[fragmentedforrest]

“Your silence is loud,”

[fragmentedforrest]

I like when stretch marks get pearly and shiny.

[fragmentedforrest]

8 months in and my gut still does summersaults when she turns the corner

Am I lucky or am I lucky?

[fragmentedforrest]

Boutta see just how far I can defy my autism

How long can I put off my avoidance to certain textures and certain sounds?

How long can I go without my security lifelines.

I’ve made it this far without my headphones let’s see just how far I can get.

Stepping outside my comfort zone; I wanna know what I can push myself on.

What can I get myself used to?

How brave can I make myself?

I’ve sat with several ideas for so long I think I’m ready to work on myself some more,

[fragmentedforrest]

I’m I wish I had the balls the tell her how anxious I get when she’s away.

How I curl up in a ball and spend the whole night thinking about the next time I’ll see her.

I hope that somehow by chance she’ll see this

But I also hope not

Because then she can see where my wounds are still raw

I wish she was here to see the parts of me I’m still too afraid to face

[fragmentedforrest]

I hope one day

When you see my madness bear its teeth, and the claws stained with my thoughts

That you’ll meet me there on the line

Between my tears and your kisses

And pull me into your safety