#frankendewey

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oh no

I’m predicting Jamie will time travel.

I’m predicting Dewey is part-gem and can reform; kinda like regenerations.

I’m predicting they’re going to fuse and are Buck. Time travel might allow them all to exist at the same time.

Conclusion: Buck Dewey is a timelord.

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*enjoying a pleasant spring day in the park - doing life sketches of trees and flowers in bloom and hearing the sounds of birds chirping and children playing and and*

WAIT WAIT wait is the plant in Dewey's office a snake plant?

I can find a lot of varieties of snake plant but this looks close! The establishing shot wasn’t of any sort of special mayor’s office either - it’s Dewey’s house. This is his plant.

Snake plant right under the portrait of Dewey riding a horse because he was around when horses were the fastest form of ground transport HE’S A 200-YEAR OLD SNERSON FIGHT ME.

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One more lil smidgen of evidence that Buck has two dads:

(Billiam!) Dewey’s white shirt +

Jamie’s red turtleneck EQUALS

= Buck’s red shirt.

Buck is a fusion. He has two dads. Just like Garnet is made up of Ruby and Sapphire, Buck is made up of Bill Dewey and Jamie.

Fusion experiments!! Sneeple! Jamie’s gonna time travel! Both Bill and Buck are fusion experiments with cuts of gems or something! William + Buddy = Billiam! Idk what Buck’s ‘real’ name is but it’s probably Billiam James Dewey the Mailman or something and I’m rolling around in a hornet’s nest aaargasdkfjsfj

i’m tired of using the pepe silvia gif to be tongue-in-cheek about how cracky my theories are so you’re getting this lady instead

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Steven’s Birthday, though:

Steven shapeshifting ages and looking real sweaty and being extra pink with that shirt - HMMMM?

The most we know about Steven’s aging so far is that it happens very slowly and inconsistently. He needs to learn it from someone else - and Greg and the Gems are going to be useless to him for this.

They even manage to fit in a fire reference - the candles on the cake! Dewey’s symbol is fire - hE’S GOT A FLAME ON HIS HEAD OK. THERE’S EVEN GARNET - A FUSION - HOLDING IT BECAUSE DEWEY WAS A FUSION EXPERIMENT WITH GEMIFIED COMPONENTS OF WILLIAM DEWEY AND BUDDY BUDWICK QWNBRWMNE;R;R;LKW

We might even see something similar to this episode again but with more of a resolution - because Dewey is going to show Steven how to permanently reform to a different age! I think it might involve Connie having a growth spurt and Steven wanting to match her in some ways. It might also involve Dewey shapeshifting or reforming to appear younger for Jamie, just as Steven tried to look older for Connie.

...but who cares Dewey is part-gem and part-human. DOGCOPTERS. SNEEPLE. Deweylite is a variety of serpentine!

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oh wait wait

Bu-ddy Budwi-ck

Buck.

lmao yes Buck was named after his grandpa. Bill Dewey is a fusion experiment with components of a gemified William Dewey and Buddy Budwick.

Buddy Budwick is Buck Dewey’s grandpa aaaa that campaign sign makes so much more sense now XD

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The dog in Three Gems and a Baby is a shapeshifted Bill Dewey:

He’s also may have borrowed Jamie’s turtleneck for serious realsies:

Given that I think Jamie might BECOME ALSO PART GEM LIKE DEWEY AND TIME TRAVEL?? this could also be a shapeshifted form of Jamie, but idk about that yet. Whether it’s Jamie or Bill, they should put some pants on cuz that’s awkward.

i may be busy planning my wedding but I STILL GOT TIME FOR A TINFOIL HAT BABEY

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Lizardite

Lion eats lizards, yeah?

You’ve heard me screaming about at least some of the people in Beach City being gem/human hybrid experiments - the first of them probably being Dewey. This is a show about (gay space) rocks! Let me talk about rocks for a second:

In gemology, Deweylite includes lizardite and stevensite - I take the stevensite bit as Rose's involvement in Dewey's creation somehow.

Those little lizards? They have bits of gems running down their backs but they don’t poof like gems do when Lion kills them. They’re part gem and part organic. They’re lizardites - early tests of gem/organic hybrid life!

Lizardite is a variety of serpentine. Bismuth mentions a Serpentine in the bubble room of the temple in Made of Honor - so I am wondering if Rose may have used Serpentine as a test case. Maybe a way to re-purpose corrupted gems she couldn’t heal? (Sneeple! Snakes!)

This also might have something to do with some gems being easier or harder to make cuts of. Perhaps serpentine was easier to cut. (Similar to how the diamonds may all be cuts of one larger diamond!)

Also why are there feathers from that lizardite? This might be a reference to cats killing birds, I guess. but idk. everything feels significant to me now fff

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WD - White Diamond or William Dewey

BD - Blue Diamond or “Billiam” Dewey

YD - Yellow Diamond or “Yellow Dad” for Yellow Tail

PD - Pink Diamond or Peedee

My theory? Three of the four are gem experiments, created by Rose - the initials are namesakes. William Dewey sharing initials with White Diamond was coincidental, but it inspired Rose to come up with names for the others when she created them.

(thanks to @ptpjacob​ for pointing out the Yellow Tail thing!)