#funny right

[vamospeat]

jerking off in a way that protests the state of the union

[alirienge]

Something something, searching for immortality as a way to cope with loss, etcetera.

[mono-socke]

in the beta The Election of 1800 jefferson's response to "you used to work on the same staff" isn't "WHAAAAAAAT" but instead "w-what!?" and that is something i love a lot

[justaz]

lance taking his niece and nephew to get ice cream after keith returned to the blade after spending a week in cuba with them:

silvio, rambling about keith’s next visit: -and he can bring kosmo again and kosmo can take us all the was to china and then we can-

lance, amused: i don’t think kosmo can teleport that far

nadia: tio?

lance: hm?

nadia: why does keith call you babygirl?

lance:

lance:

lance: let’s play the quiet game. whoever wins can get a double scoop

[cranberry-branflakes]

am I doing a Mike Wheeler by believing hes still alive?

[seamplush]

Chapters 2 and 3 go to such great lengths to make sure you Know who dess is. and then right after a flashback where we get to see her for a little while they introduce this mysteriously antlered knight. on a snowy landscape right next to a Christmas tree

[star-staruck]

let it goooooooooo let it goooooooooooooooooooooo cant hold it back anymoreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

No instead we say

FUEL'S FOR GOING ON BURN IT DOWN UNTIL IT FALLS OVER 🔥

[val-thomas]

Humans Are Space Orcs

Take, for example-

Alien: Human, what is this Menstruation I keep hearing about? Also known as a form of punctuation in a sentence, Period?

Human: oh yeah since I didn’t get pregnant all the unfertilized eggs kinda leak out. Lol.

Alien: 0.0?

Human: yeah it happens annoyingly often. personally i get cramps and stuff but some other girls will get like. huge blood clots and pass out and get sick and can even lose feeling in some limbs from the pain. crazy how nature works huh?

Alien:

Alien: I want to go home now.