#goodomenshc

[b3st-part-of-b3li3v3]

I would like to think Aziraphale has an ongoing beef with the founders of Hobby Lobby who wre constantly trying to buy out his store.

[i-solmnly-swear]

Hc that Aziraphale becomes infamous among chefs in London. It’s basically culinary superstition. This charming gentleman, with white curls and his out of date but immaculate suit. If he isn’t pleased by the food the restaurant never lasts. Not that the gentleman ever does anything more than sigh sadly and pay his bill, always tipping well of course. But something always happens, hordes of rats on inspection day, pipes that never stop leaking no matter how many times they are repaired, there’s even a story about a chef who refused to serve the gentleman and was later attacked by a giant snake in his own kitchen after closing (though no one reallly believes that one). But anytime a patron comes in matching this description the kitchen is always immediately alerted and their food goes out with special care. The wait staff all joke about it after work around drinks but enough of them have worked at restaurants that closed too suddenly, and in strange cercumstances, that they half believe it too.

Crowley is solely responsible.

Aziraphale will occasionally mention something along the lines of

“Do you remember that place we tried a fortnight ago, you know, the one that just butchered the poor oysters? Well I just heard that they closed down! There is a rumor that the failed a surprise inspection. Apparently the inspector opened the walk-in cooler only to be greeted by dozens of very mad ducks*!”

Crowley will casually say something like “hmm, imagine that” very carefully Not looking at the little smile his angel is giving him.

*(they had been very rudely transported via demonic miracle to a very cold cooler, you would hiss and peck whomever opened the door too if you were a duck)

[kickasstransdumbass]

Head cannon:

Crowley used to call Aziraphale Angel because he really didn’t know his name

but then as time went on and they became closer friends he didn’t stop calling him Angel because he didn’t want Aziraphale to know that he hadn’t remembered his name, especially since Aziraphale memorized his name from the get go

and as more time passed Angel slowly became a (affectionate) nick name to the point where it was just as relevant to Crowley as Aziraphale’s actual name

[lilorangekitten-main]

GOOD OMENS AU

WHERE AZIRAPHALE IS MR BINGLEY AND CROWELY IS DARCY CAUSE THOSE TO MOST CERTAINLY HAD SOMETHING GOING ON IN PRIDE AND PREJUDICE

[ineffeablefanboi]

My immediate thought after episode two

Very small, very simple head cannon for my first post based upon my own theory about people

but,,,

I’m pretty sure

Aziraphale reads to Crowley

Every.Damn.Night

Without fail.

So hear me out.

I have a theory that if you are a person who doesn’t like reading; then, for one reason or another, you’d like being read to.

In episode two, Crowley ever so casually mentions that he doesn’t read. Which instantly put the wonderful thought in my head of him sleepily curled up on Aziraphale’s lap as he gets lost in the sea of words that are beautifully painted and recited by his husband.

Annnnnd because this doesn’t feel long enough, enjoy a hastily, poorly written bit of when it first happened.

“Just one more chapter.” Aziraphale mindlessly mumbled.

Crowley couldn’t help but groan hearing those words for a fifth time, granted he wasn’t sure if one chapter had even passed. He looked over to his angel, who had been curled up near the opposite side of the cozy chaise lounge they shared for nearly an hour, Crowley couldn’t help but lean forward and catch a peek at the title.

“Are you joking??” He exclaimed just loud enough to break Aziraphale’s eyes from his book for the faintest second. “I’ve seen this one- I’ve seen you read this one at least a hundred times! You’re really holdin up all our plans tonight for a book that you’ve had to have picked up at least a thousand times!” He scoffed in impatient annoyance, his face twisted into a look of disbelief.

His angel chuckled, licking the tip of his finger just before turning the page, of course the sudden outrage didn’t make him miss a beat.

“Maybe if you read it, you’d understand why I’ve picked it up ‘at least a thousand times’“ Aziraphale replied in an almost mocking tone.

Crowley settled back into the lounge, tugging at his coat.

“Oh no, no no no no no, can’t stand reading. Too long, too...wordy.” The demon spoke as if that word alone was far too big for his mouth.

Now that was something that threw off the not easily disturbed angel.

“What do you mean ‘too wordy’???” He gently closed the book and placed it on his lap, though his whiny voice didn’t reflect the calm mannerisms.

“It’s just an endless sea of words, books are! None of it makes sense, so why spend hours commitin to one?” His hands, too, showed his attitude towards this far more than his confused tone ever could imply. 

Aziraphale let out a small sigh in understanding before picking up the book once again.

“Alright then,” the angel pats his right thigh “this simply won’t do, I refuse to believe that anyone can dislike books”

The prideful demon scoffed, looking down at his angel’s (rather tempting) offer.

“Angel, I am a demon, not some uneducated child! I don’t need someone to read for me, it won’t change a thing!”

His angel raised his brows in an almost pleading anticipation, tilting his head ever so slightly in Crowley’s direction in a tantalizing manner.

“Give me one chapter to change your mind..” He pat his thigh again “Come on then”

Crowley pursed his lips in thought, though there was really no choice in the matter.

He let out a frustrated sigh before adjusting himself to rest his head on the angel’s thigh. Aziraphale smiled as he opened the book back to the first page.

“I’m never doin this again,angel, I hope you know that.”