leeroy hating themself because they were only perceived as male while irl, and to them masculinity is inherently abusive because the only parental figures they had were an abusive father and a mother who wanted them to be just like their dad.
and then they get a chance to start over as jax, still hating themself and then being seen, beheld, loved, and even accepted as a woman in warmth and love unconditionally by ribbit and they got scared. the moment jax was at their most vulnerable they had a bow in their hair
jax pushing everyone away because they hated their own femininity, scared because ribbit saw who jax was, a beautiful woman, and loved her. jax was loved and jax didn't know that and jax pushed it away because they were used to the cold
jax's own internalized misogyny, the aspect of them most like their father wearing a maid dress, showing that jax, deep down, still wants to be a woman. they still want to be the person they were when ribbit saw them for who they are.
the fact that they still wanted jax... the fact that ragatha loved the jax that could trust ribbit. the fact that zooble likely saw jax as a woman, too. the fact that pomni didn't know jax's troubles but still saw them as worth loving.
the fact that ribbit still loved jax. ribbit knew jax wasn't like this. ribbit saw the real jax, the scared girl who wasn't allowed to be a girl, and still loved her.
the fact that leeroy hangs out at riley's bar, showing she still has a chance. she is loved by the people around her. she has avenues for her transition.
fuck the finale was good.
