#grim humor

[emperornorton47]

[chaotic-archaeologist]

Interviewer: where do you see yourself in five years?

Me: fighting to live in a world ravaged by climate change.

Interviewer: *laughs nervously* haha no in an ideal situation.

Me: no that is the ideal situation. In the non ideal situation climate change has killed us all already.

[peacefulcecil]

Watch your step

(Rose Hill Mausoleum, OK)

[idrawtooslow]

How am I? I can't complain! No, seriously, they have long-range microphones trained on me, and a sniper ready to shoot me if I say anything negative. Which is fine with me, by the way, I like it! I really like it!

[adeviex]

I am a very expensive fancy pen

Translation: I just had to process my own invoice and I am under "office supplies"

LOL(?)

Can I get one of those swanky carrying cases at least?

[cookiemonsta1970]

Remember folks, if you want a Sky Burial, you should walk there yourself. Don't ask a friend to move your corpse.

[idrawtooslow]

Good morning, fellow Americans! Are you enjoying each having a house and two cars? I like to mow my lawn

[idrawtooslow]

ADD Tip: You can change the goals on your to-do list!

As your needs and your situation change during the day, don't be afraid to cross out and replace items on your to-do list.

And if you accomplished something that wasn't on your to-do list, write it down and check it off!

This will help you maintain a more realistic idea of your productivity during the day, as well as identify any particular things that may be hindering your productivity or taking up too much of your time.