#27 The Last Stick Standing Part 2 (Harry Styles)
SO HERE IS THE MUCH REQUESTED IMAGINE!
(It’s quite long so, I hope you like the story!)
Maybe, time has a way of healing things. Maybe it is like a balm on a wound, and slowly it helps heal the cut. Slowly stop the blood from flowing, slowly start making a net to stop it. And, my life was like a sharp nail, that kept scratching at the wound till the blood started flowing again. I wanted to stop now. I couldn’t get myself to jump off the cliff. I couldn’t, and I wanted a fresh start now. So, I cut all my nails. It was time to start fixing myself before I blamed myself. It was time to redo.
More time was spent by me. For the first time, in a long time, I didn’t look for the company that always wanted to surround myself. I grew up with the idea that having a group of people around you led to happiness, and Matthew had it. I just didn’t fit in that group. I visited the library, reading the self-help books which helped me a lot. Just to find peace at times, and for the time to go away. It hurt initially, I wanted what my brother had, what people around me had, but maybe I wasn’t meant for it. And that was okay. I didn’t have to conform according to the world around me, I could form a new path.
It was difficult in the start. Keeping to myself, not crying, but it had been better lately. I was feeling better. I was taking care of myself now. I liked my body, my hair, my eyes, I was falling in love with myself for a start. Figured that was wrong, I had this need to always hold on to people to validate myself, first Matthew, then Harry. I had myself now, and it felt wonderful. I was laughing more. I was happy. I had a few people who I talked to in class, or some were library specific. Some were from the coffee shop I went to, but I kept a distance. Not till I was ready would I let them close, and I wasn’t ready yet.
I didn’t go back home in the summer. I got myself an internship instead, and they paid me quite well. My parents weren’t pleased, but it was Matthew was upset.
“You don’t have to work to run away from me,” He slammed his hand on the door.
“I’m not running away from you or anyone for that matter,” I smiled. I smiled at him lately. No, I didn’t talk to him. It wasn’t healthy at first, I knew. But no one treated their family like that. And, I didn’t have to give respect when I didn’t receive any in return. He chose his girlfriend, his friends repeatedly over me. When I was treated like shit, he said nothing and, then expecting me to be all love and care, when we are alone was some shit.
“Yes, you fucking are! I know you! You just want to ignore me like a punishment,” I rolled my eyes, “Like some revenge, and then blame all your shit on me in front of Mom and Dad like you always do!” He screamed and, I dropped my stuff I was holding in my hands.
“Is that it then? You don’t want to be blamed for me not coming back home?” I folded my hands.
“That’s not what I meant,” He tried to correct himself, but I knew better.
“Well that’s shit, but don’t worry. I didn’t tell mum and dad anything about us. I want to work, and therefore I am. Not everything in this world is about you, you know.” I folded my arms, “And, as far as my dealing with my shit goes, I don’t want anything to do with you anymore.”
“Giselle...” He came forward, and I stepped back. "You’re my sister, my twin...”
“You’ve lost all your rights to call me that. It shouldn’t matter to you. It isn’t going to make any difference to your life,” I got back to my work. “You should be glad I’m not coming back with you. The perfect child can be with his perfect parents who love him all alone!”
“You don’t mean that,” He shook his head.
“Why because it hurts you? Because it is finally being stated? You are the perfect child, the perfect little boy they wanted to have while I just came along with the package. Don’t tell me you haven’t felt me being treated like that, oh wait, you won’t know! Because you spent all your time gloating about how you got the better! It’s so in your face in everything. For people outside, we must be a family that provides equal chances to everyone, but we know it’s not. So, why don’t we accept it and move on. I will not live in this illusion that my parents love me like they love my brother, and then live in this complex my entire fucking life!” I yelled.
“Gissy...” He tried to hold my hand.
“You couldn’t even be there for your sister when she was actually in grave danger. What sort of a family is this? Did I tell you, I don’t get a call from mom, every Saturday. I call her, while she calls you! Thank fucking god, I got a scholarship for this place, or they wouldn’t have even sent me here while you weren’t even pressured to get one! Where were you during all this, Matthew? You don’t have the right to call yourself a brother. Go to your fucking girlfriend and family!” I screamed, it all came out. I couldn’t control it. There was so much that was never said, so much hidden, I couldn’t let it all out, no, this wasn’t right. “Get out!”
Was he going to cry? He ran out before that, and I couldn’t help myself from following him. I didn’t see him, but I saw Harry standing in the hallway. He looked at me with shocked eyes, “What? Enjoying the show?” I slammed the door before he could answer.
The good thing was that I saw none of them during the summer. It was a relief and a good escape. My internship was hectic but brilliant, and I earned quite a bit while my spending wasn’t much. It was good for me, mentally and emotionally. After I didn’t call mom for two weeks, she finally did. She screamed at me for not calling and about how worried she was, but couldn’t say much after I told her that she didn’t hear from me for two weeks, and dad didn’t send the money so, there wasn’t much worrying happening. The ‘enjoy with your son’ was another thing that stopped her. All my life I was treated like the second best. Like I wasn’t important, made to feel that way, if I wanted to stop pretending and get over this competition and want for attention, I had to start afresh.
Today, I was soaking in the sun. My body was toned now by all the running and workouts I put in every day. My hair was longer, and I for the first time in a long time, felt happy in myself. I had made a few friends as well, and was hanging out with them when I saw him.
He was tanned now, and I could see the muscles that developed over the summer. His eyes widened as they took me in, I did look different.
“Hey Gissy, let’s go get those pancakes now. I’m sure they’re ready!” I offered Nick my hands, and he pulled me up. I felt his eyes follow me as I got up and walked to the stall.
“Giselle,” I turned around knowing it was his voice. I smiled, “You look different.”
“I grew my hair,” I nodded. “This is Nick,” I introduced my friend, and they greeted each other.
“I’ll meet you there,” Nick nodded and I turned to Harry.
“So, how was summer?” I asked.
“Fine, yeah how was yours?” He asked.
“Quite lovely, hectic but lovely,” I nodded, “So, I’ll see you around, yeah...”
He held my arm, “Where were you?”
“You didn’t come back home. Why? I know you were mad at him, but he is your brother,” He frowned. “And, being as righteous as you claim you are, I expected you to be there.”
“What are you talking about?” I frowned.
“Wait, you don’t know?” his eyes in shock. “Matthew, he met with an accident...how do you not know?”
“What? How? When?” I took out my phone to see if I missed any call or message. I had nothing.
“A week ago, he is bad, Giselle.”
“I wasn’t...I didn’t...fuck!”
“If you’d like, I’ll be leaving to see him in about an hour, I can give you a ride,” He said, and I nodded wiping my tears. He was my brother after all, and I couldn’t believe mom hadn’t mentioned anything! Not much could be expected out of them, though.
Rushing back to my room, I packed my things and met Harry outside. It was a four-hour ride back home, and I couldn’t wait. “You know, that night when I had asked you out...”
“I really don’t want to talk about this, Harry.”
“Fuck! Why? Why can’t you give somebody else a chance to explain themselves! You did the same with Matthew when he constantly tried to reach out to you. He can’t help being who he is, but I have seen him fight every person who said shit about you. But he couldn’t always protect you! I don’t know what you guys had while growing up, but I know he genuinely does love you and care about you! Fuck, I saw him howling in the car after you slammed the door that night!” He yelled.
“That night, I called him up to pick me up, the night you left me, remember? He switched off his phone to have sex with his girlfriend and came knocking at the door three hours later...”
“He wasn’t having sex with his girlfriend, by the way,” Harry cut me off. “She had taken his phone, and thrown it across the room. When he went to fix it, it was broken. He then went to replace the model so, he could contact you. Meanwhile, that bitch hid his keys, and then after arguing for a long time, she finally gave it. He looked for you the entire night, I looked for you with him because for some reason he thought you weren’t safe. We finally gave up and reached your dorm where you were, thank god!”
This was a perspective that I didn’t know. All this while, I thought he had left me alone, but he hadn’t. I had misjudged the situation so bad.
“And as for me, if you’d let be explain myself,” He waited for me to interrupt. I didn’t. “I really liked as you as well. I still do for fucking’s sake, knowing how impulsive you are, and such a pessimist! I told you I was caught up with Ally and the gang. They had my book in their hand. Fucking never using a typewriter again in my life! And, all my books as well. They threatened to burn it, they actually did burn a few chapters to prove a point. Ross had my things which he was so ready to pour oil on and burn. Earlier, the plan was to mess around with you, and I thought fine. I will go with it, and then tell you everything they did so, you’ll understand and we’ll have our date!”
I looked at him, wanting to know more, “But, it didn’t happen that way. Then, she didn’t stop the car when we went forward. Drove all the way to the pub and took me and kept me the entire time until Matthew came to look for you. He beat Joss up and, I handled Tyler and we rushed outta there.”
“Why didn’t you tell me this before?” I asked, now crying.
“I was so guilty for the longest time, Giselle. Knowing what had happened, knowing how you weren’t talking to Matthew, knowing I could lose you forever with one wrong word because you weren’t listening to anyone,, I just couldn’t do it. I loved you and I was so guilty. On your birthday when you went back home, I planned to tell you everything. But you were so broken, I didn’t know what to say to fix it. And then, you thought I liked Ally and hated you and, I was so guilty Gissy,” Harry shook his head.
“Thought time would give me a chance, and when I built up the courage to tell you, you threw Matthew out, slammed the door, I couldn’t reach you with the wall you’d created.”
“Oh god, this is such a mess,” I cried into my palms.
We reached the hospital in my town and I rushed to reception. Asking for his room, I ran up the staircase and Harry followed me. I reached the room and stopped when I saw our parents outside.
“Giselle, what are you doing here?” Mom asked me. Dad looking at mom accusingly.
“How could you not tell me?” I asked them.
“You were working, Giselle. We thought better not to distract you!” Dad cut mom.
“Bullshit! She knew I finished work last week!” I yelled.
“Do not raise your voice at us, young lady!” Mom spoke in the voice she used whenever she wanted to make me disappear.
“Then stop coming between me and my brother!” I told her. “If you want me out of the family, say it to my face instead of creating a divide between us!”
“Enough mother. I have had enough,” I said, pushing his door open. Walking inside I saw the doctor giving an injection to Matthew. Matthew oh god, his hand and his left leg was broken, he had bruises on his face. His upper body was covered in bandages, his head was hurt. I wanted to cry.
“Gissy, hey...” he tried to smile. I stood away from his bed. “Please come here.”
I wiped my tears and slowly walked to him, sitting on his bed. The doctor gave his last pain killer and left. “What have you done to yourself? You didn’t have to get so bad to get my attention.”
He laughed and then grimaced in pain, “Don’t make me laugh, it hurts.”
His left hand which was better pulled me closer, and he kissed my cheek, “I missed you.”
“I missed you, too,” I said, crying into his neck. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know, I thought you hated me, I’m sorry.”
“Hey, you’re my twin. We’re basically the same. I could never hate you in my life! I’m sorry for not noticing the differentiation earlier. I’m such an idiot, but you should have mentioned this before and not hid it from me.”
“It was what I was taught,” I shrugged. “Does this hurt?” I asked, touching his ribs.
“I broke two,” he whined. “You’ll have to take care of me now. I can’t live in this town anymore!”
“The jailers should let you go,” I laughed.
“I think we should shift into that apartment you saw. It seems like the perfect opportunity!”
After talking a bit more with my brother, Harry came in and they talked for a while before he slept from the pain killers. Dad walked with me outside leaving mother behind. “Your mother loves you too,” he said.
“But loves Matthew more. You do too. It is not exactly hidden,” I said.
“It’s not like that, Giselle. You are as precious to us and Matthew. Yes, we have been harder on you, but that’s because your mother faced a lot of problems being a woman and, she wanted to prepare you for that. Yes, maybe a son is seen as more important, but we don’t want to lose you for it.” He said. Maybe some wounds take time to fill, but slowly with time, everything becomes alright and I could only hope for this to become better.
“So, you like me?” I ask, handing Harry a coffee.
“Pretty much,” He said, taking some time. “You know, there is a very good restaurant down the road.”
“Hmm, I grew up here,” I said, sarcastically.
“I’d like you to take me on a date there then. Right now would be nice. I’m starving,” Harry said, standing up.
“You’re driving me. To cancel all the chances of a repeat, you know!” I laughed.
“Shut up!” He said, pulling me as we walked towards the car.
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