🙋 Is Spamton a TransMasc in your au?
yes but i haven’t really. figured out how i want to touch on it (if at all) .
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🙋 Is Spamton a TransMasc in your au?
yes but i haven’t really. figured out how i want to touch on it (if at all) .
IM GIGGLING YOUR BANNER?? WHAT POSSES YOU TO PUT IT THERE HELP ME
IT’S FUNNY I SWEARRRR GAHAHAHA
I didn’t expect anyone to actually comment on that omg but it was gonna be that one or a screenshot of qftim with Bendy in pain “I’M GONNA DIEEEEEEE”
I KEEP SAYING THAT LINE AND MY FRIENDS KEEP LOOKING AT ME LIKE IM CRAZY
qftim is just a whole meme to me cause what do you mean this was actually in there
something about John just makes me think he’d give really nice hugs
Like those really warm bear hugs or something
starting to realize there may be more to me than just the autism……
um im gonna rant about this. i have mixed feelings on self diagnosis. but. just for myself. lookin around it feels like people actually understand whats goin on in their heads. and i…. dont…….
like for the past 3 years ive been just calling myself autistic. and a lot of people have sincerely told me i show a lot of signs (im very awkward/ have a strange manner of speech, struggle with eye contact, am either extremely empathetic or can’t feel any empathy whatsoever, actively stim, and have had moments extremely similar to autistic meltdowns which have included going nonverbal for extended amounts of time)
there have been a few things, though, that ive just chalked up to my own personality. my inability to follow projects through, severe and near detrimental procrastination, being unable to get myself to eat/drink/shower/etc without a large amount of effort, struggling with cleaning and staying tidy, struggling with focusing on things that dont interest me…… i just thought that was a lazy thing….
ive been called lazy my entire life, mainly by my family and more specifically my mom, and ive kinda just internalized that. ive always considered myself a lazy person and a procrastinator! and so have most others!!! i dont think most of them understand, though, is that it is a genuine struggle for me to do things. there have been moments where the thought of doing something has made me physically ill, no matter howww much i wanna do it.
ive done my fair share of research on autism, and those things really dont fall into it….. recently i looked into executive dysfunction (one of my lovely mutuals told me to do some research on it… can’t remember who…..) and uh! wow! it fits a little too well with a lot of my behaviors. and, if im right? executive dysfunction is linked to adhd more so than autism…. but this isn’t to say i have adhd. id need to do a lot more digging on it before i feel even a little bit confident in sayin that…. but um! im coming to terms that there might be another thing in my head thats fuckin with me!!
self indulgent oneshot idea still spinning around my mind….. but is it too self indulgent………
been thinking about making a w2h confessions blog of some kind……. would anyone be interested in that sort of thing? i thought it might be a fun thing to see
edit: to yall who are just now seeing this i did indeed make one, it’s @welcome-to-confessions