Illinois takes your hand as you step out of his truck, guiding you down onto the grass so you don’t take a tumble. He tugs you into him, holding you against his chest with a mischievous chuckle.
“Careful there, can’t have you twisting an ankle around here.”
“You saying you wouldn’t have caught me?”
There’s a moment where he looks offended, before bringing you up into his arms and refusing to let you down.
“If you think I would ever let you fall, I have not been irritating enough.”
“Wh- ILLINOIS JAMES PUT ME DOWN, YOU ASSHOLE-”
He dodges smacks and flicks with a smirk on his face, only stopping in his tracks when you steal his hat. You place it triumphantly on your crown, looking at him smugly with your arms crossed in front of your chest. He simply freezes, with a faint blush creeping across his cheeks. The way it slants on your head, a bit too big for you completely enamours him.
“Sugar gonna steal my hat now, huh? If that’s how we’re gonna play-”
Illinois sets you down abruptly on the hood of his truck, far higher than what you feel comfortable sliding off. He gives you a snarky salute, grabbing things from the backseat to set up for your date. Leaving you stranded, forced to watch as he plays the role of a “proper gentleman”. You adjust his hat atop your head, keeping the sun as it sets out of your eyes to glare daggers at him.
He sets out the blanket on the grass, bringing out the picnic basket and small cooler to set on top. There’s a few pillows that he tosses down, and another softer blanket on top. When it’s set up, he scoops you up by your waist and plops you onto the pillows, giving you a soft landing. He swipes his hat back, tipping it to you as he sits down beside you.
“They’ll come out, any second now.”
The sun goes down and within minutes, the world around you starts to fill with twinkling lights, floating about and sharing their beautiful brightness. You look to your side, and Illinois is laid back on the blanket, hat on his chest as he looks up at the sky. You decide to join him, tucking yourself against his side as he moves to wrap an arm around you.
“Was this worth the drive?”
“Absolutely.”
You place your hand on his chest, and he moves his hat to the top of your head, chuckling as you swipe it off.
A/N: PEACHY SIR I AM SO FUCKING SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG UHHHHHH but im still alive. i am here. im fine. this is some hcs about before transitioning and during and a lil after bc i feel like after it would just be. pretty normal. uh i did the 5 that appeared in ahwm, excluding heistiplier bc ehhhh. Darkipier, Wilford, Yancy, Illinois, Magnum. Rated T, i think. TW: mention of periods, scars, binding, dysphoria. Yeah. I think that’s it. Enjoy!
Trans Male!Reader HCs
Darkiplier
Doesn’t really care
You have girl parts. Great
He has a century old demonic entity+a pair of twins. You're not special
Tries to be understanding, but mostly just doesn’t address it very much
There’s no need to! He loves you, it doesn't matter to him!
He will try to make you feel comfortable if you start to feel dysphoric
If you menstruate, he deals with it well
Both Damien and Celine would know precisely what to do so…
Heating pad, candy, movies + snuggles
Makes you lay down and hold the heating pad while you wait for the painkillers to kick in
Has a timer for 10 hours and you WILL take your binder off when it goes off
Is not afraid to threaten you over it
You know he doesn’t mean it and DAMMIT MAN YOU’RE GONNA HURT YOURSELF
If you start to take T, he just sits next to you
It might seem like he’s vibrating a little
That’s just the emotion seeping out
It seems like he doesn’t pay attention to your voice
In reality he listens closely everyday for how much deeper it went
You expected him to laugh when your voice cracked
he just asked you to repeat what you said
You appreciated that
He offers to pay for your top surgery if you decide to get it
Whether you say yes or know, he supports you
But he’s also nervous because Surgery
He checks the history of every person who even might be near you
Your surgeon was acting “strange” so he interrogated the poor man
You then explained he was doing his JOB
He squeezes your hand and kisses the back of it before you go into surgery.
The others have to convince him that you are not, in fact, going to Die
When you get out of surgery he stands on the other side of the room, waiting
He looks straight out of a horror movie
You almost scream when you wake up
He steps into the light holding a basket of fruit
He’s been watching a lot of romance movies…
Makes sure you DON’T FUCKING MOVE when you get home
You are going to LAY THERE and HEAL and you’re gonna LIKE IT
Often asks how your scars feel
A little defensive if people ask about them
A bit protective, but pretty much the same as before
Wilford
I don’t… I don’t think he comprehends the situation
I don’t think he knows what you mean, i’ll be honest
I think he just. Loves you. And filters everything else out.
Because unless it changes how you feel about him, it Does Not Matter
He treats you the same way he always does
Which includes being extra clingy and cuddly when you’re feeling bad or dysphoric
If you menstruate he goes into Good Boyf mode
Meaning he absolutely SPOILS you, moreso than usual
Cooks for you, buys you… a lot of things you probably don’t need…
Asks "is it shark week?" and buys extra detergent
You will take your binder off when it's time
You have no choice in the matter
and when you don't he somehow gets it off of you???
I dunno man, he's like. A god. Who knows
He WILL make sure you're safe and healthy whether you like it or not
If you start to take T, he's not allowed at the clinic
He's banned from like. Everywhere.
He always makes sure to say your voice sounds deeper
Even if it's early and it doesn't and you KNOW it doesn't, he says it anyways
He's just being supportive, it's fine
He's a lil nervous if you decide to get top surgery
The idea of someone just straight up cutting you while you're ASLEEP???
hate. bad. no thanks.
He tries to watch through a window but has to give up bc he just starts feeling Bad.
he sits and bounces his leg in the waiting room and plays with a fidget toy you got him
He basically teleports into the room when you're out
The nurse faints because what the FUCK
He just holds his bowl of chicken noodle soup while they're dragged out of the room
You eat and talk for a bit and he just gazes at you bc your voice is so nice
He's very smothering when you get home
Thinks you're gonna hurt yourself whenever you do anything
sit DOWN you dumbass you're gonna TEAR YOUR STITCHES
makes you binge a bunch of movies with him
He doesn't really pay attention, just watches you to see if you need anything
likes to trace and kiss your scars if you let him
Loves you so much <333
Yancy
I mean. He probably doesn't know what you mean
You are? a boy? I don't?
You explain and THEN he understands
He's a lil dumb, it's ok.
He isn't quite sure how to make you feel better when you're dysphoric??
Does he call you manly? Does he completely ignore you? What does he do?!
Eventually he’s settled on awkwardly calling you “Handsome” and “very masculine”
If you menstruate, he panics
He's had a mom before, he knows what it does
He doesn’t know how to make you feel better
He doesn’t wanna coddle you but also he likes feeling like he’s needed
He tries to cook for you but uh. yeah that didn't work out
The cook kicked him out and then made it themself, having Yancy deliver it to you
He convinced the warden to give him painkillers as well, and buys you candy
He’ll make sure you take your binder off when you need to
Might be a little lax, like with a child
“Okay… 30 more minutes. But then yous is takin' it off!”
Doesn’t fully understand the repercussions of you not taking it off
Once he does he literally BEGS you to take it off
Actually started crying one time
If you start T he asks a bunch of questions you probably don't know the answer to
He’s fascinated by how much your voice changes
He bites his lip to not laugh whenever your voice cracks
Once your voice gets like. As deep as it will go he kisses you and says you sound hot
He will panic if you decide to get top surgery
Constantly suggests robbing a bank or robbing a rich person
“There’s some expensive shit that’s been confiscated, i can help!”
When the day actually comes he's on the consistent verge of a panic attack
he can't even like BE there because. prison.
He cries while everyone else has to comfort him for the entire time you're healing
Once you see him again he interrogates you to make sure you're taking care of yourself
A guard lets you two have a little time alone, and you two talk about it
If you let him, he wants to see the result
He gives you a big hug and tells you how much he loves you
Illinois
Probably the only one who actually understands and actually KNOWS shit
though he's too narcissistic to really… like… care
He loves you, but like. If you don’t mention it he doesn’t really feel a need to
He will make sure you’re okay, he knows when you act weird
Other than that he doesn’t actively do much
He says "hey there handsome" or something like that every morning, and that's about it
If you menstruate, he just tosses you painkillers and says there's ice cream in the freezer
I mean. that's pretty much all you need
He will cuddle if you ask, though
Also flirts with you and talks to you more
If you bind, he will be very pushy about it
Will not let you do anything until you take your binder off after the designated amount of time
if he's on an adventure, he calls the others to go to your place and tell you to take your binder off
He knows you won't listen but I mean shit he doesn't want you hurt
If you DONT take it off and have bruises he will straight up blackmail you
Keep doing this, you don't get any cuddles or kisses
Mostly for your benefit bc. bruises. but still
If you start T, he will help, but only if you ask
When your voice cracks he laughs
He apologizes while still laughing
He sleeps on the couch a lot
A little startled after he comes home from an adventure and your voice is deep?? hot???
If you get surgery, he’s relatively calm
He doesn’t like the sounds and smells of the hospital, though.
They weird him out
He’ll kiss you a bunch before you go into surgery and then waits outside.
Probably goes to get some food as well
When you’re out, he sits by you and eats, waiting for you to wake up
He slides an apple over to you and tells you to eat if you feel like it
He does his best to take care of you at home
He knows how to heal, and you need to SIT your ass down
Stays home from adventures while you heal
He doesn’t trust you to take care of yourself
He will not ASK you to take care of yourself he will TELL you because he KNOWS how you are
Stares at your scars sometimes
He doesn’t mean to be rude, they're just… there
He likes them. They’re cool. They’re yours, how could he not?
Tries to be as respectful as he can be
Kisses your scars. Like a lot. Like a LOT a lot.
He has a thing for scars, they’re badass
Captain Magnum
Completely Does Not Understand
At the same time, Does Not Care
Can you shoot? Can you stab? Can you loot? Then you’re perfect
Treats you the same way as the rest of his crew but with a lil more special attention
That attention being calling you rugged and tough
If you menstruate, he recommends hanging out with the rest of them to distract you
He also recommends LOOTING!
You’re pirates, what else would he want from you
Will stop in a town to buy whatever you need, if you ask
But you can probably get something from some other crewmates
If you bind, he won't let you do anything until you take it off when you need to
Think you can trick him bc he doesn't know what's happening?
SURPRISE BITCH HE LOOKED IT UP
ya can't fool the man, he may be stupid but he's not dumb
If you want to start T, he’ll stay in one town for a while.
Understands that you need this, and doesn’t want you to be upset
NO he’s not playing favorites but yes he absolutely is
Doesn’t ask questions, it’s not his business
However, if you explain, he will listen
Will be elated if you steal from the town
He’s still a pirate, and you are still his boyfriend, you had to do something
Makes you sing sea shanties when your voice gets deeper
Better be prepared to sing the chorus alone, even if you’re a shit singer
He just loves to hear it and therefore EVERYONE ELSE will hear it too
If you get surgery, he’s very nervous
He's never really been in a hospital but he thinks it's unnatural
Too white. Too clean. Too much.
Refuses to go in the hospital, but gives you a tight hug before you go in
He then regrets not going in because he misses you a lot :(
Once you're out and can go back on the ship he's very gentle
He's not a gentle man, but he tries
Makes you stay in your quarters and tries to make you comfy
Doesn't really know what to do so let's a crewmate help you
Claims that your scars make you badass! and attractive!
Puts you on the front lines to boost up your confidence
It only makes you nervous really, but you appreciate the effort
While out camping, neither of you feel like pulling your cooking equipment out and making something from your prepped meals. Your GPS leads you to a shitty pizza joint in the middle of nowhere, but at least there’s minimal effort in ordering shitty pizza from a shitty pizza joint in the middle of nowhere.
You each get a personal pizza since he could easily finish one himself. That, and there was no way in hell you were gonna share with him. You sit up on the hood of his car, leaning against him as you eat your greasy pizza over the pizza box. The stars twinkle in the sky above the desert.
“Next time, we’re not camping out in the middle of nowhere again. I’m so fucking done with snakes.”
“There’s snakes everywhere, darlin’. The ones in the city are just a different kind.”
You both laugh, him subtly shaking you as you lean against his chest. He down at you as you lean your head back, flinching out of the way as you flick his hat. It doesn’t move much, which he’s grateful for as he doesn’t need to get up to retrieve it. He boops your nose after fixing it, hoping to disable you temporarily to stop the flicks.
“Hey!”
“-is for horses. Which I asked if you wanted to ride, but you said no.”
“Illinois James, you fucking know that’s not what I meant.”
“I think you overestimate my intelligence, darlin’. What is it you always say? The cave rocks are more intelligent than me?”
“And I’d say it again.”
Illinois grabs your wrist, fighting against your resistances to take a bite of your pizza. He makes exaggerated biting noises every time he “misses”, hoping to get you to laugh.
“Oh c’mon cutie, won’t give me a bite?”
“Go back to eating rocks, golem brain.”
Illinois laughs, pulling your hand behind him to pull your face up to him, surprising you with a kiss. You look at him with a bit of shock in your eyes, before squinting at him and flicking his hat again.
“I wouldn’t recommend doin’ that a third time there, honey bun. I’ll put you in air jail.”
“You wouldn’t.”
“Try me.”
You know better than to test him while you’re still hungry, so he gets to be smug for a bit while you finish your pizza. He hops down, going to toss his pizza box in the parking lot garbage can, tipping his hat to you. It’s hard not to notice the particular way he walks, and how he reaches for his whip any time he bends down to grab anything. You stash the rest of your pizza in the backseat, sliding down the hood of the car and going to sneak up on Illinois.
He seems to hear you, whipping around with his hands out and in a bit of crouch.
“Whatcha doin’ there, darlin’?”
“Round three-”
You run at him, going for his hat as he dodges out of the way. Your feet skid against the pavement, turning back around to go again. All he does is tip his hat again, hands poised to grab you. Your legs carry you as you sprint at him again, with him moving out of the way at the last second, clotheslining you on his arm. You fall back into his hold as you’re stunned, Illinois quickly wrapping his arms around you. Out of breath, you look up at him with a lighthearted glare.
“Bastard.”
“The one and only.”
He leans down to kiss you, although he stops a breath away from your lips as he hears something else. In a second, he drops your legs and uses his hat to block whomever just walked out of the pizza place from watching you two kiss.
Since it’s my birthday this week, I request 🍪🎉💊📖for Illinois please <3
Absolutely! Happy early birthday!
🍪- Because Illinois is usually off adventuring in hot, tropical climates, he will usually gravitate towards something cold if he wants something sweet. Milkshakes, ice cream, ice pops, doesn't matter to him. But if he does have a choice, he prefers melon and mango for ice pops, and anything caramel for ice cream.
🎉 - If he's off on an adventure, he'll make sure that you have groceries and flowers ordered to your place for you when you wake up. He tries to make sure that he's in a place with service so he can video call you. But if he's home? He'll get all of the usual things, but prefers to stay in and make you food than going out to eat. He's home so rarely it's more of a treat for both of you to have him stay.
💊 - Homemade soup. You show any sign of sniffles, you blink and there's a bowl of soup in your lap. While he does believe in medicine, he's been around the world so much that he knows there's a soup for everything. So he'll give you meds and a hot drink of your choice, but there is so much soup in your immediate future.
📖- He is such a fucking history nerd. Constantly reading up on the cultures of the places he's going, enjoying customs and traditions from an outside view. He also has quite a few translation booklets for Spanish, Japanese, Chinese, and Russian, mostly. He tries to learn at least some of the local language before he's off on his new trip, but eventually all the languages kind of meld together for him.
