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Person 1: I think we're getting close

Person 2: yeah i think we're really bonding and getting to know each other!

Person 1: i meant we're getting close to starbucks

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Prodigy as Incorrect Quotes

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MC: I think I'm falling for you. 
Marlon: Then get up.

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Isla: Hey Naomi, do you have any hobbies? 
Naomi: Swimming.. 
Isla: Really? That’s cool. I never expected you to- 
Naomi: In a pool of self hatred and regret.

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MC: I need life advice. 
Cyrus, sipping Gatorade and eating cookie dough: You came to the right person.

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Naomi: MC isn't talking to me. 
Marlon: Enjoy it while it lasts.

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Cyrus: We’re playing Scrabble. It’s a nightmare. 
Kieran: Scrabble? Scrabble’s great. 
Cyrus: Not when you’re playing with MC/Marlon, it’s not. They put words like “ephemeral” and I put “dog.”

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Isla: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming? 
Marlon: Can everyone in this godforsaken group please learn the skill called "Think Before You Speak"? 
Cyrus: Ya know... it might be.

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Marlon: Here is my wall of inspirational people. 
Kieran: Is that a picture of you? 
Marlon: Yes, I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.

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Naomi: You know what’s funny about MC? They’re my best friend, and anyone who’d hurt them is someone I’d murder, probably.

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Kieran: I only have two emotions: exhaustion and stress. And I’m somehow always feeling both simultaneously.

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Marlon: Oh, so when crows remember people who wronged them and hold grudges, it’s “intelligent” and “really cool”. 
Marlon: But when I do it, I’m “petty” and “need to let it go”.

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Isla: Like, no offense to myself and all, but what the fuck am I actually doing?

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Isla: It's not ugly, just aesthetically challenged.

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Cyrus: Keep it running. *Tosses keys over shoulder into empty parking lot.*

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MC: Thank you for not saying "I told you so." 
Marlon: When you’re as right as I am, you don’t have to say it.

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Isla: Just be yourself. Say something nice. 
Marlon: Which one? I can't do both.

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Naomi: I think MC/Kieran is in trouble. 
Marlon: Alright. Struggling to give a fuck, if I’m honest.

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Isla: If I die, my funeral will be the biggest party ever and you're all invited. 
Cyrus: "If" 
Naomi: Great, the only party I'm ever invited to and she might not even die.

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Isla: I am not a whore, and, not that I’ve done the math, but, if I were, I’d be the super classy kind that gets flown to Dubai to stay in an underwater hotel.

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Naomi, writing in her diary with a glitter gel pen: I'm losing my sense of humanity. Nothing matters. God is dead. There's blood on my hands.

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Marlon: You disgust me. 
Cyrus: *eating a kitkat sideways* I realize this and don’t care.

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MC: I think we should kiss. 
Marlon: And I think you should die but we don’t always get what we want.

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MC: Is something burning? 
Cyrus, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you. 
MC: Cyrus, the toaster is literally on fire.

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MC: We’re having a moment, aren’t we? 
Marlon: If by 'a moment' you mean me not wanting to strangle you for the first time since we met, then I guess we are.

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MC: If I run and leap at Naomi, she will most certainly catch me in her arms. 
MC, running towards Naomi: Coming in! 
Naomi: No! I’m holding coffee! 
Naomi: *Drops coffee and catches MC*

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Person A: “It’s actually funny, there’s only girls in the house”

Person B, thinking: “what about me? I’m not a girl

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Person 1: how're you feeling?

Person 2: not good. i have this headache that comes and goes

Person 3: *walks into the room*

Person 2: there it is

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Person 1: say at least one bad decision what I made

Person 2: in chronological order or in alphabetical?

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Person 1: We saved our best idea for last!

Person 2: If it was our best idea, why did we save it for last?

Person 3: Because we didn’t know it was our best idea until all our other ideas turned out to be terrible.

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Person 1: I'd like to apologise to the entire nation of Australia, again.

Person 2: I wouldn't!

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Person 1: I have cat-like reflexes.

Person 2: prove it.

Person 1: *points to a cat*

Person 1: I like that cat.