#incorrect riddler quotes

[ohsokey]

Edward: do you want hear my Penguin impression?

You: I do now

Edward: ayy itsamee da penguin! I’m wakin he-ah

You: please for the love of Batman do that in front of Oz

[lnky-dreamer]

Edward, sleeping: ...

You, Shaking him softly: Eddie, Eddie.

Edward: Hm..? What.. what time is it?

You: Uh, around 1 or 3, not too sure I took a walk earlier. But!

Edward: you took a walk at 3am?

You, waving his remark off: That's besides the point. I found...

You raise up a frog with both your hands: A FROG!!!!! :D Isn't it cute? Can we keep em?

Edward, looking at you in disbelief: ...You found a frog.

You: Yup!

Edward: At 3am.

You: Bingo!

Edward: And decided to wake me up for that?

You, smiling widely: Absolutely!

Edward: God I love you.

You: So can we keep the Lil guy?

Edward: Absolutely not.

You: Dammit.

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Riddler: *taking hostages after highjacking a game show*

Hostage: *on his phone not paying attention to the monologue*

Riddler: Okay, okay, this has to stop! It isn't flowing. *shoots to the air* I need everyone paying attention to me. C'mon. Off the phones. It has to be fun. *uses the gun to point to the hostage* You. If you gonna disrupt at least let's see if it's worth it. So riddle me this: what was the biggest number of likes you ever had?

Hostage: ... 86

Riddler: *on shock* 86?? *laughs* Are you serius? 86?! *gets unconfortably close to the hostage* If I ever had only 86 likes on a post *whispers dramatically* I would kill myself.

[gxdsetmxnsters]

Hi, I’m fucking baby ÒwÓ

— Riddler

[ohsokey]

You: I am obsessed with you, Eddie!

Edward: is.. is that what I sound like?

You: …

Edward: I’m obsessed with you too <3

[ohsokey]

Riddler: I wonder if Batman thinks of me at night..

You: he probably does honestly.

Riddler: you think so? Because I think abou-

You: he probably thinks about kicking your ass..

Riddler: ……

You: ……

Riddler: he thinks about my ass? 🥺✨🥺💚

[ohsokey]

You: Hey, Eddie, can you help me with this crossword puzzle?

Edward: if I ever say no to you, please put me down.

[ohsokey]

Random Edward Nashton (Riddler) HC

He’d would purposely give you hard puzzles to solve, so he can make a bet with you for silly favors.

Edward: a deal is a deal. you can’t go back on your word, y/n..

You: -sighs- it’s just when you said an “intimate favor”, I didn’t think you meant singing The Phantom of the Opera.. can I at least be Christine?

Edward: you know damn well I’m the soprano in this relationship