Oct 8, 2025
Alec: That building is, like, 5 Clary away and we’re at least 14 Clary high.
Clary: Please don’t use me as a system of measurement.
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Alec: That building is, like, 5 Clary away and we’re at least 14 Clary high.
Clary: Please don’t use me as a system of measurement.
Magnus popping into Alec’s room pissed: Why even have a phone if you don’t use it!
Alec, confused: I-I what? I was just taking a shower??
Magnus: For an hour? I thought you were dead!
Alec: I don’t respond immediately and you think I’m dead?!
Magnus: I have a lot of enemies Alexander.
Alec, stunned: How….how many-
Magnus: Too many! Come on you’re sleeping at my place tonight!
oh my god i’m sorry i didn’t mean to ghost you guys for four months
Alec: are you crying right now? Magnus: *sobbing* this book is too fucking sad Alec: Alec: it's an interior design magazine Magnus: *still sobbing* yeah, the designs fucking suck
Clary: We call that a traumatic experience. Clary, turning to Maia: Not a "bruh moment". Clary, turning to Simon: Not "sadge". Clary, turning to Izzy: And DEFINITELY not an "oof LMAO"
Magnus: can you do something for me?
Alec: I literally entered Hell to rescue you
Magnus: right, well can you do the dishes?
Alec:
Alec: no.
Julian: since I'm leaving town for a while I have left you all a complimentary bowl if advice.
Julian, picking a piece of paper from bowl: for instance, 'Ty you can't keep that' just applies to everything
Alec: *Answers phone.* Hello?
Jace: It's Jace.
Alec: What did he do this time?
Jace: No, it's me, Alec. It's actually me.
Alec: What did you do this time?