A lot of people take me as a joke, like anything that’s serious that happens to me doesn’t matter. It’s not serious for them. It hurts when you try to open up about something that happened to you and no one takes it seriously not even the closest person takes it seriously and makes it a joke. Like it’s funny. Like it’s not serious. Where they tell you it is your fault, why wasn’t you crying why didn’t you react as much. When you feel so numb you cannot react. I said my no I said my stop and I don’t want and I continuously tried stopping it. But no to everyone else it’s funny?! It’s a joke?! It was my fault. I didn’t ask for it. I didn’t enunciate anything. Or lead him on. But yet it’s my fault. For someone to hurt you who you thought was a friend is one thing but to have those who claim they love you to mock you and joke about it daily is another. I still feel numb inside but why should I be sad all the time, why can’t I smile?