If anyone tells you you shouldn't "let your Autism diagnosis define you" feel free to share this...
I understand the idea behind not letting a diagnosis define you, but I strongly disagree.
The reason is because for so long I didn't have a diagnosis, and not having one did define me.
To my father I was a lazy, capricious, child who had her head in the clouds and had zero follow through. If I didn't "get my act together" he threatened that he would add another definition for me: a loser.
My teachers defined me as a loving, curious child, who was so smart and could be so many great things if I could would only just apply myself.
My high school English teacher doesn't know the 10 page paper she assigned the class to write with no clear prompt would not only cause me to cry with anxiety and panic all 15-20 hours I was writing it (because of rejection sensitive Dysphoria), but would cause me to break down in the car on the way home when she returned it to me with a crisp "C" on the front. Until that moment I was a straight A student. She told me I should have applied myself more, that she knew I was better than that paper.
She said that to me because she didn't know. Neither of us knew.
I would have more breakdowns in college and when I finally dropped out for my mental health, I was given another definition: wasted potential.
I was suicidal before I got my diagnosis. No one understood why. I felt like the person I was inside wasn't what people were seeing on the outside. I felt lost, broken, confused and alone.
My diagnosis defines me because it saved my life. I was told I wasn't a failure, or broken. My brain is different. Autism is a neurotype. It means I see the world differently, think differently, but that doesn't make me less.
It means I need to learn how to live in a world that wasn't designed for me. I was already doing that, but now I don't feel ashamed when a joke goes over my head or I miss a social cue. I don't feel selfish saying "I need to go somewhere quiet because it's too loud here". It means leaving my job as a web designer at several popular advertising firms because the long days of working in one spot and interacting with people was destroying my mental health. It meant focusing on things I loved (storytelling) and following where it lead (writing and producing a podcast, acting in tv shows and films).
My diagnosis meant having access to medication for my ADHD and going to therapy so I could be a better parent to my child and make sure that they don't go receive the bad definitions and labels I was given, so all they need to do is follow the path they forge for themselves.
I know that the idea of not letting a diagnosis define you is a good intentioned one, but it's misplaced.
Because this diagnosis saved my life, and has saved the lives of other late diagnosed Autistic adults I am close to as well.