AU idea: What if the Baudelaires bumped into Lemony
•After Olaf strikes Klaus against the cheek the kids decide to just say F-it and run away from their so called Guardian and end up running into Lemony Snicket
•Lemony finds out that they are the Baudelaires which gives him a mild mental break down finding out Beatrice is dead and then freaks out hearing that they are with Olaf “how did you three end up with him?/ Good question; We’d love to know the answer to that too.
•after spending a couple hours with him, the Baudelaires are just like “Your the only proper person to be are guardian for, your are new father now” and stay by his side like baby ducks
•Lemony then decides to take them to Monty which forces him to socialize and stay because the Baudelaires refuse to let him go (sunny bit on his clothes and refused to let go) “we’ll stay here if the sad lemon stays here”
•Olaf finds out about the Baudelaires being with Lemony and makes up some scandal saying the kids were stolen by Lemony
•Olaf still manages to fool Monty and the rest by using disguises and don’t believe the kids or Lemony because they say it’s ridiculous and Lemony is delusional after being on the run for so long
•Lemony continues to take the Baudelaires to there guardians in hopes that the kids will latch on to them instead
•after the M-Mill he just “Fine, you know what, I’ll stick with you kids because no one is going to actually keep you three safe” and go to different locations to hide or lay low in
•when they get to the AA Lemony freaks out again realizing there are more children suffering and almost strangled Nero
•Lemony took advantage of the cafeteria and cooked actual good food while teaching Sunny
•the Quagmires find out about Lemony and recognize his name “OMG, your the map book guy Quigley talked about” and just imprint on him adding the duckling count to 5 so the Quags become his responsibility and has a panic attack after they get kidnapped
•worked as a sub-librarian while going ahead and telling the kids basic info on VFD and they all just sleep in the library which does good for the soul but not for Klaus’s eyes
•in the V-Village, Lemony has a reunion with Jacques who tags along (w/ hector) as they all get in the SSHA-mobile home but is punctured which crashes into the unbuilt part of the H-hospital
•Jacques figures that’s a good time to tell the two Quagmires that there brother is alive “Why were you with are brother?!?!/ You were with mine so we’re even./ But Quigley wanders after being alone for a while./ Lemony does too./ No I don’t.
•at the S-slope they finally see Quigley who is more then amazed to meet lemony and asks him to play the accordion multiple time making the ducking count 8 (Jacques and Hector made 6 and 7)
•not sure about GG but Fiona is coming along in the ride too
•Kit meet up with them at Briny beach and the whole Snicket reunion involves a lot of crying, hitting, and sarcasm “Why are you so fat/ I’m pregnant you moron./ Lies, who have you been holding hands with.
•by the end Lemony finally agrees and says “ok I’ll be your father now”
