Mafia stuff (both Matsu, real life, and GTA stuff) kept popping up on Tumblr and it rekindled a conversation @siro-cyl , @meggo-b , and I had two years ago, back when we were heavily into GTA 5 and commented how Michael De Santa would totally throw a party where everyone had to come as mobsters with his love of old black and white mobster movies.
So, enter the Herzlos Crime family: the Godmudda (me), Meggie tha Mouth (Meggo-b), and Shepherd (siro-cyl) who were created from our GTA Online characters who are essentially us running around throwing sticky bombs at each other while laughing like idiots. Then siro-cyl brings out the tank and everyone dies. I wish we recorded some of the shit we did.
I blame @jazzymongoose for this and I can’t even be mad B| I guess one fandom merging into another is happening XD This would be a crime family the Matsunos would butt heads with.
Art by @siro-cyl Info undercut.
The Unholy Trinity.
The Godmudda (No, I don’t mean Godmother and yes, that’s how it’s said, it’s how Shepherd and Meggie say it, yes you have to say it that way too) – The tall, dark silent type. While she can speak, she chooses not to but according to Meggie tha Mouth and Shepherd, if she has to, it will be the last thing you will ever hear. She seems to share a mental bond with her two associates as they seem to know exactly what she’s thinking or saying without saying anything at all. She uses motions with her underlings or lets Meggie and Shepherd deliver orders. Her expressions are usually very relaxed and subtle but she can get some extremely scary ones from time to time. She carries an umbrella or a cane wherever she goes that harbors a blade within the item which she is skilled with. Also on her person are two pistols.
Meggie tha Mouth – Bold, brash, belongs in the trash. The Godmudda’s Bodyguard despite being a foot shorter than her and everyone else. She is very loud and is willing to fight anyone and everything. She is the voice of the Godmudda. Subtly is not her thing and she will make her own spy music when on what is supposed to be stealth missions. She is prone to fits of rage and will fight someone over compliments. (I.E. Presto from Animaniacs and Tommy Devito (Joe Pesci) from Goodfellas). She puts googly eyes and glitter on everything, including corpses. Her signature weapon is a lead pipe named ‘old Rusty’. She believes bigger is better when it comes to weaponry and she relies on sticky bombs and anything that explodes. “Go big or go home.”
Shepherd – The Intel and negotiator. Voice-wise, they are normal volume. They are a ‘Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing’, Master of Disguise type, able to get anything that the Godmudda needs, including gathering information on rival families by infiltrating them. Shepherd is the driver of the Godmudda’s car as Meggie has lost driving privilege after one too many road rage incidents where she has rolled the car trying to a parking place at the Olive Garden. Shepherd never takes off their gloves in order to keep their fingerprints off weapons and other things. Meggie has also been known to hand them gross items before. Signature melee weapon is a crowbar. Shepherd is an excellent sniper and relies more on long distant attacks. Every time Meggie busts someone’s kneecaps, she goes out and buys Shepherd a sheepie plushie for whatever reason.
Meggie is usually the one to take care of beatings and such while Shepherd takes care of quick kills or meticulous tortures to get info.
When Meggie goes on a tangent and can’t be calmed down, the Godmudda just touches her shoulder and she quiets down immediately.
The Godmudda will make various noises in reaction to something outrageous or hum to herself but she rarely speaks. This was a play on how the online character is completely silent in GTA Online and unresponsive to shit that was happening, including being dragged around by psycho murderer Trevor Philips in a couple missions.
Shepherd’s hobby is photography.
Since this was technically from a video game, I had to add this:
Things Meggie tha Mouth is known to sing/say during fighting:
*to the tune of ‘That’s Amore’* “When I hit your right eye with my trusty lead pipe, that’s a hemorrhage!”
“In the name of the Godmudda, I’m gonna FUCK YOU UP!”
*kisses fingers* Mmm, Beautiful!
“Don’t make me pop-a-squat in a skirt! Ya don’t wanna see that!”
“IT’S THE COPS! CHEEZ IT!”
“Forget the ambulance, we need a hearse!”
“So, I was talking to the Godmudda,” “And? What did she say?” “That you’re a little bitch and need to be taken out. Old Rusty needs his exercise.”
Things Shepherd is known to sing/say during fighting:
“What do ya want?! A kiss on the cheek?! Get da fuck outta here!”
“Never saw that coming, did ja?!”
*facepalms* “Goddammit, Meggie…”
*tilts head and puts crowbar over shoulders* “You lookin’ for a bad time?”
“Outrun this bullet and we have a deal.”
“No First Aid kit is going to fix that ugly mug.”
“Bad news, the Godmudda said no to the deal,” “She didn’t say anything!” “I wouldn’t be here right now if she didn’t. Bite the bullet.”
HELLO! I'm back to tell you, you're awesome, I'm love you and I hope you have a good day *brings a can of beer as an offering*
Glad t’see ya back, Jazzy-chan! You even brought my favourite beverage...but you could’ve at least tried to be less obvious about wanting to Wed ‘n Bed me, Haha! <3
Osomatsu, *puts me little white girl fists up* FUCKIN FIGHT ME!
Hey, hey! I’m more of a lover than a fighter, but don’t get me wrong! I do love me some scuffles every now and then, but hugging? Kissing? I’d take that over fighting any day!
