My therapist is on parental leave but I KNOW they would be so proud of me for consistently using an odd number of ice cubes recently

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My therapist is on parental leave but I KNOW they would be so proud of me for consistently using an odd number of ice cubes recently
Whump fascinations + OCD = wanting to scroll the tags of either here or ao3, but being unable to search the weirdly specific ones on account of the Invisible Audience that can see your every move. I’m a freak (nonsexual) but they can’t know the specifics THATS EMBARRASSING OKAY
I'm flying for the first time in 6 years next week and I keep checking my id to make sure it's the "real id" even though I know it is because I got one a few years ago when they were first introduced but like...what if it changes? 👀
ocd has convinced me that my sister's 8 year old son was swapped at birth and that alone is why i will never be a parent 👍
My data hoarding is getting worse with my OCD. It just never feels like hoarding or a problem because I'm a meticulous (convinced this word is just an euphemism for obsessive compulsive) organizer and I aggressively clean and delete anything redundant. Like 4000 beautifully labelled and categorized books on my Kindle, Calibre and and hard drive are a damn bit of use for anybody.
Meanwhile my living spaces are an absolute dump. I'm as compulsive about keeping everything around me clean and organised as the data, so when I'm too physically ill to do that it stresses me out, leading to more executive dysfunction and worse flares, leading to more OCD and depression, leading to my surroundings becoming even more a dump. I hate this.
my OCD made me check contraindications to taking an antibiotic I am feeding my cat just in case I absorb it through my skin after sitting on a couch where my cat drooled after taking the pill
so quirky haha
I spent two hours crying and hyperventilating because she kept spitting the in-water-dissolved pill out and I couldn't wipe it off of everything because I couldn't keep track of where it was and I couldn't shower her either after she drooled on herself because I don't have a cat shampoo and I don't have money to buy it and I haven't slept in ages so I'm too exhausted to do my OCD's bidding but the intrusive thoughts won't shut up about it so I can't sleep or rest anyway and that's just triggering my health anxiety as well and now my cat having diarrhoea somehow led to me believing I will die
but sure
your affinity towards perpendicularity makes you a little bit OCD
✨✨🙏🙏 Billy alive please. Billy alive please. Billy alive please. Billy alive please. Billy alive please. Billy alive please. Billy alive please. Billy alive please. Billy alive please 🙏🙏✨✨