#kanej thoughts

[saphofthehollow]

can we for godforsaken hell stop quoting it as "I would have come for you?" Because that's not what he'd originally said! That makes it seem like he'd have gone to her in that one instance.

The true quote is "I would come for you." Kaz says it twice! "I would come for you" meaning it doesn't matter if it's past scenario that she's asking him about or a possible future one. He'd go to her every single time in every possible case.

Please. The original quote is so much more meaningful. 😭😭

[neptune-scythe]

The thing I appreciate so much about Kanej is that they are an example of the deeper more nuanced aspects of a relationship that is so often overlooked in modern media.

It's Kaz loving Inej's laugh, it's Inej paying such close attention to Kaz that she can tell when he passed out just from the change in his breathing, it's Kaz emptying his life savings to buy Inej her freedom, it's Inej about to kill all the Dregs just to save Kaz, it's Kaz buying Inej a ship so she can have her dream of hunting slavers even though that means they'll be separated, it's Inej accepting who Kaz is and acknowledging that even if she didn't always agree with his methods that the Barrel needs him just as he is.

It's how well they know each other, that their relationship is based on friendship and mutual understanding, it's the little things like Kaz seeing Inej and feeling like a little boy who believes in magic again.

It's so much more than the typical modern portrayal of love that requires touching or sex to telegraph what two people feel about each other. They never need to hug or kiss or hold hands for us the readers to know how they feel because Leigh put the effort into portraying the beauty and depth of real love that modern media so often doesn't bother to attempt.

Regardless even of the fact that I, and many other aroacespec people, feel represented by Kaz, Inej, and their relationship, their relation and interactions with each other shows the aspects of love and friendship that is so rare in modern medias. And especially for younger generations growing up with TV and books, seeing love portrayed as sex or physical attraction can be very misleading and leave them confused when those things don't give the satisfaction in real life that it is given in media. But Kanej is the balance of that, they are real love, portrayed in the ways that show what real love is.

Young boys and girls and non binaries and every other gender or type of person can read these books or watch the show and see what real love is. They can see they don't have to sell their bodies or give up their boundaries to satisfy another person and that none of that would guarantee being loved, that love is so much more than just physical attraction, that being known and valued for who you are as a person in the current moment is the most important thing.

I want to make this another TedTalk about why I take issue with Kanej being portrayed in fanfics and fanarts as touchy or needing that to show they've healed or that their relationship is valid, but I'll keep this one focused on the positives so I don't get all the aphobes and haters clogging up my notifs ◉⁠‿⁠◉

[ruins-and-rewritez]

It's 4am and you can't sleep

Kanej spins around your brain like a bowl of ramen in the microwave

[lunarthecorvus]

Don't mind me just picturing Kaz and Inej riding horses side by side.

I can see this happening in canon because Kaz grew up on a farm and he would've been taught to ride a horse by his Da, and Inej would've grown up around horses for the performance or they would've hitched the caravans to them

Thank you for listening to my Kanej thoughts :)

[saphofthehollow]

Imagine the crows chilling at a cafe and some guy tries to ask Inej out.

Kaz: She's not interested.

The guy: Are you um together?

Jesper (mocking): Yeah, are you guys together?

Kaz (looking away): No. She's an investment.

Nina (adding fuel to the fire): So, since you aren't together, it should be Inej's choice then. Why's it bothering you, Brekker?

Wylan (sighing): Guys I don't think this is a good idea.

Kaz (glaring at a random spot on the table): I'm not bothered.

The guy: So what do you say about-

Kaz (gritting his teeth): Leave.

Matthias (smirking): Relax, demjin. Poor guy's just trying to get a date.

The guy (looking at Inej): Well?

Inej: I don't th-

Kaz: She's my god-damned investment dammit!

[neptune-scythe]

Thinking about while Inej is at sea, gone for months at a time, how Kaz would feel her absence. How he'd come to rely on her, to be used to her presence. And now it's gone. She was like an anchor to him, the only thing that kept him sane those first moments in the Ice Court was the memory of her voice. And just knowing where she was would ease his mind I think, whether or not he was aware of it.

But when she's gone?

He has no idea where she is, if she's okay. They probably send letters, but that takes time, and anything could happen. She could send a letter saying all the wonderful things she's accomplished and be dead moments later. And he might never know; if the ocean swallowed the Wraith without a single trace ... He would never know how it happened, or if she's still alive and captured somewhere, if she needs him.

And maybe she spends so much time at sea that they drift apart, maybe the letters become less and less, her visits to Ketterdam for shorter times. Maybe years pass and they've missed too much of each other's lives ... Maybe their love isn't enough anymore. It's still there, it always will be, but their lives no longer fit together. Like two islands once so close they almost touched, but as the water and the earth shifted around them they drift farther and farther apart; though still they'd have a piece of each other, the sand from one island washed over to the other and stayed, a seed carried by a bird, an imprint of their time together even as they have moved so far they are beyond sight of each other.

But still Kaz would worry, I think. He would spend those quiet moments in his office wondering where she was, desperately trying to feel the safety of her presence again, grasping for even a glimpse of it like a lifeline. I think he would hate himself for it, for getting attached, for needing her. For spending every spare moment thinking of her, fumbling in the dark of his soul for the tether of hers. I think he'd feel like the frayed ends of a rope, like everything inside him was out of place, like he'd fallen apart without her and been pieced together incorrectly, everything out of place. I think he would go to the harbor to look for her, for even a glimpse of her ship in the distance. Even if they never spoke, even if she never knew he was there, that he saw her, just to know she was there would be enough. To have that tether again.

It would have been mutual I think, they'd have split on as good of terms as two could. They both had the same reasons, not wanting the other to be strung along, the two of them holding two ends of a rope as their lives pulled them farther and farther apart. And rather than waiting for that rope to snap, to fray and split until it was broken, their hands bleeding as the rope burned across their skin ... They let go. Because neither wanted the other to bleed for them, not when both could see that was the only outcome.

And Kaz would want Inej to be happy, to have her life ... To be free. He'd helped her find it, and that was enough. She could never truly be free as long as she was tethered to him, not while her life was at sea, at least. Not while he was still living his same life, the life of the Barrel. She deserved more than that, she deserved to be untethered to a place, or a person, to have her ship and her mission. And I think he would be satisfied as long as she was happy, even if that happiness meant he would never see her again.