a battle of the egos
a/n: the two of them would fight about it like dogs let's be fr
pairing: kano x afab!reader x johnny
warnings: nsfw (MDNI), pussy eating, finger fucking, slight overstimulation, eager Kano, slightly mean Johnny
you can’t believe you’re stuck in an actual dick-measuring contest
but you suppose sticking two of the most egotistical men you’ve ever met in your life in a cramped hotel room while on a mission wasn’t the smartest decision
it’s not like you had volunteered to be here, General Sonya Blade hadn’t wanted to deal with them themselves (understandably), but then she had given the assignment to you
you’re still reeling over the fact that the Black Dragon and the Special Forces even have a temporary truce to track down a group that’s been giving the both of you trouble, but it’s given you more trouble than it’s worth having to balance out the arrogance of both Kano and Johnny Cage
at this point, you think your body might actually shrivel in on itself from the way the two of them are glowering at each other, and you pinch the bridge of your nose in frustration as you listen to the metal of their belts clink
even worse, the hotel only had one bed available in the already cramped room with a less than proper mattress and an even more suspicious looking couch
“so, luv, who’s got the bigger dick?” Kano’s voice cuts through your line of thought, accent as thick as the hair on his chest, and you scowl at the both of them
“seriously? are you-oh my god.” you cover your eyes for a moment as the both of them whip out their dicks as if they’re swords
this is an absolutely ridiculous situation, Sonya owes you a big fucking favor when this mission is over
“c’mon sweetheart, it’s not like you’ve never seen one before.” this time Johnny eggs you on to look, and you feel heat crawl up the back of your neck
so, you’ve never actually seen a dick in real life before
that isn’t to say you aren’t skilled with a toy on yourself, but you’ve always been too far engrossed in your work to manage a relationship long enough to reach that level
besides, you had heard the horror stories that men are pretty shit in bed anyway, so you didn’t think you were missing out on much
silence fills the room for too long, and you hear Johnny suck in a sharp breath at the realization
“are ya kiddin’? you’ve never actually seen a cock before?” a laugh escapes from Kano, and you scowl from behind your hand as he continues to taunt you, “what, ya scared or something? don’t worry, i won’t bite, not unless you ask.”
you can already hear the infuriating smirk behind his smile, and as much as you hated their pride, yours was just as big
taking a breath and turning back around, you steel your nerves and bring your hand down into your lap and try not to seem too embarrassed as you glare at the both of them
heat still burns across your face even as you scowl, and your manage to drag your eyes down to where they’ve got the front of their pants unzipped and their dicks pulled out
Kano, unsurprisingly, sports quite the bush down there, and he’s thick, thicker than any toy you’ve ever used on yourself, and he, surprisingly, is uncut and looks quite clean for a man with his reputation
“oi, don’t look so surprised, i’m not risking an infection down there.” Kano almost seems offended, his mechanical red heart seeming to glow with anger, and you raise your hands up in surrender
“yeah, yeah, whatever.” you roll your eyes and close them for a moment, just to try and shake off the embarrassment of not just looking but observing someone’s dick, and you take another break before you open your eyes to compare his to Johnny’s
Cage, unsurprisingly, is as hairless as his chest, and he’s not quite as thick as Kano, but he’s cut and a bit longer
“well, i mean, Cage has the longer dick, so he wins. now, can you please put them away.” you turn your gaze away, and as an extra security measure, you put your hand up to shield whatever is left of your dignity
“ha! i knew it!” there’s the telltale sound of a zip coming up from his pants, and you can hear the triumph in Cage’s voice
“whatever, length doesn’t matter when it comes to pleasure.” there’s a bit of a grumble from Kano, a hint of a challenge, and your back stiffens
please, please, please, you are begging internally for Cage to not take the bait because you don’t think you can take any more of their cockfighting anymore
“excuse you. i bet i’ve made more people cum than you ever will.” Johnny took the bait, you’re officially going to go insane
“ha! as if! all you’ve got going is your looks.” “it’s not like you can do any better.”
you tune out their squabbling as they start to resort to petty insults, and you bury your face into your hands
absolutely ridiculous, maybe you would be better sleeping out on the highway because then you could get away from the two of them
maybe if you go back to the front desk and beg, you could get a room by yourself and let the two of them fight it out by morning
the sharp call of your name startles you out of your thoughts, and you look up from your hands to the both of them
“me or him?” Johnny looks at you expectantly, and you flick your gaze back to Kano and then to him again
“what?”
“it’s not that hard, luv,” Kano rolls his eye at you and crosses his arms across his broad chest, “who do ya think is the better lover: me or him?”
for a second, you think your mind has short circuited or that you've teleported to a different timeline, and you stare at the two of them blankly
“you want me,” you point at yourself, “to judge which one of you is the better lover.”
“are you both stupid? why would i know that? i’ve never slept with anyone let alone with the two of you.” the two of them stare at you, and Johnny has the decency to look somewhat embarrassed as you scoff
Kano scratches at his beard, and you feel something shift in your stomach when a smirk crawls over his face and he starts to walk toward you
“well, we can fix that, can’t we?” Kano leans over you so that his nose bumps against yours, and your jaw drops open on its own volition
partly because you’re offended by his proposition that he would assume you would want to sleep with the both of them and mostly because you’re angry that he’s right
you sputter, words coming and failing to organize themselves into anything comprehensible as Kano simply leans in closer to you so that you can feel the scruff of his beard rub against the shell of your ear
“whaddya say, luvie? wanna go for a round with the both of us?” out of the corner of your eye you can see Johnny shift on his feet, almost as if he seemed interested in the proposition as well
Kano pulls back from you, a smirk on his face as he grabs one of your hands into one of his own and brings it up so that he can kiss the back of your knuckles
“i-um, uh-” you still can’t manage to find the words, syllables and sentences and feelings weighing down your tongue as your mind frantically tries to pull itself back together
it’s not as if you’re completely opposed to it, as big as their egos are, they existed for a reason, and you suppose that the both of them aren’t terrible options for your first time
if you exclude the fact that Kano is a wanted mercenary in most countries around the world
“well, look, don’t let Kano pressure you into anything here.” Johnny stands next to Kano, shouldering the mercenary to the side so that he has to let go of your hand
his hand comes to rest on your knee, hesitating for a brief second as if testing the waters, to see if you really were okay with the two of them being here with you
“i mean, well,” you can feel your ears and your face burn as arousal pools at the bottoms of your stomach, “i wouldn’t be…opposed to the idea.”
Kano smirks and rushes toward you first, his hand shoving Johnny back to the side while he lends down so that he can kiss you first
a squeak rushes out of you from how absolutely hasty he is, the roughness of his beard rubbing along your skin as his lips crash into yours
it’s almost painful how quick he is, teeth slightly clacking together as his hand hold onto you, one at the back of your neck and the other squeezing at your waist, and he seems almost desperate for this, to kiss you
he moans, something deep and guttural, into your mouth, his eyelashes tickling at your cheek they flutter close, and your hands grip onto his shoulders as you feel yourself be swept away into his eagerness
Kano grips on tighter to you, tilting his head slightly to try and kiss you deeper, as if he could mold himself into you, and he squeezes at the back of your neck
it makes you let out a small sound as your mind goes slightly fuzzy, and his tongue laps at the space of your lips
and yet still, he is somehow not close enough to you, and he finally drops his weight onto you
your body falls back onto the bed, and your legs wrap around his waist while your hands hook underneath his arms so that you can dig your nails into his back as he continues to kiss you
his mechanical heart digs into your chest, but the feeling is negligible to how his beard scratches at your face, drawing your attention back to his lips every time
he groans as his hips buck forward, grinding you against him, and you whimper into his mouth as it provides the delicious friction that you had been searching for
Kano pulls away from you, allowing you to catch your breath, and he trails his head down to mouth at your neck, his fingers rubbing your chest through your shirt
“fuck, you don’t know just how long ‘ve wanted this.” his words are mumbled, barely audible as you whine whenever his teeth nip into your sensitive skin
his fingers find your nipples through your shirt, and he pinches them roughly, drawing a yelp from your lips as your hands go to scratch at his back
a loud moan echoes from him at the feeling of your nails digging into his skin, and his teeth sink into your neck while his hips rut into yours lazily
“fuck, please, please Kano.” you squirm and gasp as you grind down on him, trying to get more friction on your aching clit, anything to try and relieve the pleasure
he doesn’t say anything, only a low groan answering you, and he flits his eyes to Johnny in the corner and shoots a wink to the actor
Cage has his brows furrowed, gaze firmly fixed on to your face and the way that sweat has started to shine on your forehead
he wishes he could be there instead of Kano right now, the one trailing kisses down your chest, the one lifting the hem of your shirt just enough to bite at your lower stomach, the one pulling off your pants and seeing your pussy glisten with need
if it were up to him, he would tease you a bit longer, mark your neck up a little more just to draw those sweet begging noises from you
his dick twitches in his pants, but Johnny ignores it and simply crosses his arms over his chest, waiting for his turn
you don’t notice the jealousy emanating from Cage, lost in how Kano’s sharp teeth dig into the sensitive flesh of your inner thigh and rips small desperate mewls from your throat
your hands have shot down to his hair, pulling and tugging at the short strands, and Kano groans at the feeling, finally putting his tongue to good use
he licks a wide strip up your pussy, friction flying along your clit and to your brain, pleasure imploding behind your eyes as you whine
the sounds between your legs is lewd, loud slurping and deep moans, almost bordering on a growl as Kano worships your cunt
his tongue is wide and flat along your clit, and one hand grips on tightly to your thigh, fingerprint bruises guaranteed to be there tomorrow as a reminder of tonight
his other fingers slap at the inside of your thigh as you try to close them and buck your hips away from his face
it’s somehow too much and not enough at the same time, and it feels different from all those times you had taken time to pleasure yourself
this feels more primal, more intense, something that builds a pressure inside of you until it felt like you could burst at any moment
words have all but left your mind, only helpless pleas and calls of Kano’s name as he slides two fingers into your drooling pussy
he curls them upward at the same time as his lips suck on your clit, and you whine loudly, hips bucking against his face and your back arching off the bed as you cum
Kano doesn’t let up, letting you ride his face as he sucks your clit and continues to rub his fingers against that one spot, and you feel like you’re going insane as the pleasure starts to build up again too quickly after the last one
a large hand clasps onto the back of Kano’s neck, essentially scruffing him, and Cage pulls Kano away from you, your body falling down onto the sheets and trembling as you try and process the pleasure racing through your body
“oi, what the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Kano snaps at Johnny, lips curled down into a frown and a sneer on his face, and Johnny scowls back and throws Kano back away from you
Cage wants a taste of you for himself, something clenching at his heart as he looks at your arousal and cum smeared along Kano’s face and beard
he doesn’t explain himself as he lays down where Kano had been a moment ago, his lips moving to work along your leg, leaving gentle kisses along your skin as you pant
his arms go to move underneath your thighs, pulling you closer to him as he kisses along the length of him, and he feels you squirm and your fingers tug at his hair in an effort to give you what you want
“patience, sweetheart.” it’s all he says as he continues to kiss along your thighs, moving to your other one first before even thinking about touching your pussy
Kano seethes at Johnny’s side, jealous of how you seem more needy, more desperate for Johnny as he continues to deny you your pleasure
patience had never been Kano’s strong suit, eager to demonstrate his skills to you and make you cum on his tongue and his fingers, but you couldn’t blame him
you vexed Kano, one playful banter after the next whenever you had met in the past during battle, and for some reason, it had drawn him to you
none of the other Special Forces even bothered to talk to him, more focused on capturing or killing him, but you conversed with him, talked with him
in his own head, it felt like you cared for him, even if he was the enemy, and strangely enough, he felt safe with you, a feeling he hadn’t really had for the better part of two decades
to see you come apart for Johnny, Kano hated it, despised it as Cage finally placed a kiss onto your needy clit and drew a loud whine from your lips
your fingers tug at his cropped hair uselessly, trying to find any purchase as your lips let warbling moans and cries fill the air, and your hips desperately tries to grind against Johnny’s face as his tongue slides along your folds
his arms keep your hips pinned in place however, only letting you take the pleasure that he gives you, and it makes you needy and pathetic as you start to beg
“please, please, Johnny, mmng aannh, pl-please!” your cries grow in volume as Johnny ignores you, doing everything but touch your clit, and he watches as it slightly twitches
a small smile plays on his lips as he lays his tongue along the inside of your thigh and then nips at the skin, “please what? can’t give you what you want if you don’t ask.”
you want to sob, unable to really form a coherent sentence in your head as Johnny continues to tease you, and your tongue seems to twist on itself on you try and speak
“wan’ wanna cum, please, please, i want to cum!” hot tears finally escape your eyes, and you can distantly hear Kano stifle a groan at the sight of you so ruined underneath Johnny
as much as he despised Cage, Kano had to admit that his patience made this experience much more enjoyable to watch
Johnny practically purrs as you beg, and he moves one of his hands to lift up the hood your clit before wrapping his lips around it and sucking hard
it’s all too much at the same time, and you cum on his face as your hips buck and grind against his face and your sobs fill the air
his tongue presses flat long licks against your clit as your orgasm washes away, and your chest falls in uneven breaths as your body shakes
“you alright, luv?” Kano’s warm hand cradles your cheek, and you hum, eyes fluttering open to stare at his
Johnny watches through squinted eyes as Kano comes to coddle you, glaring at how he brushes a hair out of your face, and Johnny lets out a displeased grunt at the sight
he presses a kiss along the inside of your thigh before resting his cheek on it and looking up at you with a cheeky smirk, “so, who did it better?”
your mind still spins as you blink down at Johnny in confusion, “huh?”
“who made you feel better, me? or him?” Kano runs his fingers through your hair, eyes concentrated onto the nape of your neck where he had left the imprint of his teeth
“uh, um, i don’t-” you still feel heavy, clouded from both of your orgasms, and you whimper as Kano’s hand drifts down to rub along the bite mark he gave you, “-i don’t know.”
Kano’s lips pull into a grimace, a pang of jealousy running through his heart that he hadn’t really done any better than Johnny, and Johnny looks equally as disappointed at the verdict before a sly smile reappears on his face
“i guess we’ll just have to keep going until you decide, hm?” Johnny doesn’t give you a chance to answer before his tongue is back on you, lapping at your arousal and cum as a whine peals out of you, overstimulation starting to kick
for once, Kano agreed with Johnny, his eyes raking over the skin of your body as your eyes cloud with pleasure
neither really wanted the other to win, especially not if it meant they could spend the whole night with you like this
