#lemondroponice

[dustydreamsanddirtyscars]

10x12 "About A Boy"

Dean’s Struggle and Relapse

[dustydreamsanddirtyscars]

9x16 "Blade Runners"

"Dean..? Dean... Hey, it's over. He's dead. Drop the blade, Dean."

[dustydreamsanddirtyscars]

8x19 "Taxi Driver"

"Oh, you don't owe me nothing. Truth is, uh... I could use a break from all this."

Sometimes I go back to watch a random episode and get delivered a punch in the gut so strong that I am getting nauseous, because I realize that I am still heartbroken about the fact that Benny thought it was better for him to return to purgatory, because he was too changed by the experience that he couldn't find a place in the real world anymore. And all that despite knowing he'd have friends up there, friends, who'd have waited for him, would have wanted him around and would have helped him to feel like he belonged - even if they didn't manage to do that in the beginning.

And then I think of Cas, who - similarly like Benny, but with a very different backstory - always thought he should remain in purgatory out of fear he'd mess up again, out of thinking he'd forfeight to be a member of society - no matter if angels or humans - due to his mistakes.

And then I think of Dean. Dean, who wouldn't have left Cas behind and who carried Benny in his arm out of purgatory. Dean, who struggled to find firm footing similarly to Benny back topside. "You're either in or you're out", that was their motto. And while all of them returned - got out - on the other hand they might have never truly left, never really believed they deserved to be saved.

And keeping all that - being too changed by the past and by experience, thinking of having forfeight the right to be a part of society - in mind and taking a look at S10 and Dean's line about "knowing how his story ends" and being "past saving" kills me all over again. After purgatory he might have felt that way a tiny bit already, but couldn't really grasp what Benny meant (though I guess he had an idea). Now he can, now he knows how it wears on you, because he might think and feel - stronger than ever before - that he doesn't belong either, maybe never truly has and that he has no clue how that could possibly ever change.

[dustydreamsanddirtyscars]

5x04 "The End"

[dustydreamsanddirtyscars]

5x11 "Sam, Interrupted"

A very important post about Sam and Dean looking utterly gorgeous in blue scrub pants and white t-shirts while going mad.

[dustydreamsanddirtyscars]

Supernatural 10x08 "Hibbing 911" Watchmen (2009)

“Once you realize what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense."

- Rohrschach

A smiley, an emoticon for happiness, for feeling fine, splattered with blood takes quite another meaning once that thick red liquid is dripping from it, isn't it? It'a symbol for a taint on what superficially looked like being alright, but wasn't. Sounds familiar to a certain someone, who tries to tell himself that he is alright, because he is freaked out because nothing's fine?

I was fangirling a tiny bit when I watched the episode wednesday morning and it started with this visual: a bloody smiley. In my opinion it is a clear shoutout to the WATCHMEN-comics and one of the most iconic images used in the comics as well as the movie from 2009. 

The gif in the middle is right from the beginning of the movie when The Comedian is killed.

Looking at the episode and the movie there aren't any obvious references or parallels connecting SPN and WATCHMEN, but I liked both visuals so much that I just wanted them together. :)

Despite the fact that I personally think there aren't any overt references going on, there still are some fun fact that somehow connect SPN and WATCHMEN. And I don't just mean the general atmosphere of hopelessness and darkness that has been present on SPN since S9 and Dean's downward spiral.

The blood stain on the smiley in WATCHMEN represents the Doomsday Clock - indicating how little time is left until Armageddon. It reminds me a bit of the fact that we have reached 2014 on SPN - the year "Endverse" took place. Funny coincindence and as far as I remember this correctly many of the scenes of 5x04 "The End" have actually been shot on the old WATCHMEN set.

But that's not the only thing connecting both franchises. Movie and tv show share the same actor: Jeffrey Dean Morgan. Morgan played "The Comedian". His character's death sets off the comic and the movie. It's that character's blood staining the badge.

I don't know if they made this shoutout on purpose (the same way they had the shoutout to "Grey's Anatomy" with the ghost, which was who JDM played there) or if it's just a funny coincidence, but especially the talk about John somehow making an appearance - either because Dean talks about him or via flashback - adds an interesting twist to both bloody smileys.

Anyway, like I said, I just wanted both visuals together. No meta or spec thoughts here. Just some thinking out loud and marveling about wonderful cinematography. :)

If for nothing else, watch the movie for just that: pretty cinematography. Oh and for one hell of an amazing soundtrack. And Rohrschach. Rohrschach is awesome.