no bc you KNOW that ilya did to some degree view fucking shane's asshole as a conquest of sorts. you KNOW he viewed fucking shane as deflowering him and defiling him in the most wellmeaning way possible. he doesn't view shane as less-than or dirty or slutty for letting ilya fuck his ass but he DOES feel a sense of pride and ownership about it. he IS of the personal opinion that shane's hole belongs to him. that's His hole.
Olderbf!Dex who at first tries to tell you heās too old for you but it gets you going moreā¦ I need him
ANONā¦bless you, genuinely. This is perfect. Too good. 18+!!!!
Dex knew that you were going to be a problem for him the moment you moved in across the hall.
It was devastating, all at once, a catastrophe inside his mind and that rusty, barely thumping thing he calls a heart. Because you were all soft smiles, sparkling eyes and a sweet voice.
After months of impromptu knocking on his door for random bits of advice you never got about leaking pipes or broken door hinges, and him bringing you your mail and then you in return bringing him your baking experiments - it didnāt take long for something to blossom between you both against his better judgment.
But itās not like Dex has control over how he gets infatuated with someone, how they weave themselves into the tendrils and veins inside of him, until theyāre all he can see or think about at any given time during the day.
He remembers the night he tried to end it. No, thatās not the right word - because in all honesty thatās not what he was doing. He wanted to believe that he was attempting to make the smart decision, to save you heartbreak and grief and to give you a fighting chance to find someone better.
He knew that he wasnāt going to let you go, but hey, heād give anything the old college try once. And the sick part of him wanted to test the boundaries, see exactly what could happen.
It had been late, so late that the city was as quiet as it could be in the upper east side, and leftovers were in the fridge from what heād made you for dinner and he cleaned the dishes too.
A gentleman. Through and through.
Your apartment was a warm glow, safe and comfortable. It all felt so domestic he didnāt know how he was going to manage to leave, to let go of it.
Heās not good at bringing things up casually. And at this point, you two hadnāt crossed any boundaries. Hadnāt kissed, barely even touched.
But the tension was always palpable, like a live wire in the air with no grounding. The way you looked at him made him feel crazy sometimes, like one glance was all it took to undo him and his fucked up moral code and years of trying to balance the scales.
But this night, you sat so close to him that your knees were knocking his. Curled up on the couch, shoulder to shoulder and he could smell your body wash and perfume and the salt in your hair and feel the warmth coming off of you - god. This was not good for him.
āYou do know that Iām a lot older than you, right?ā
He never was good at timing. And you just cocked your head, stared at him like you thought nothing of it. His age, nor his random thought bubbling to the surface.
You reached out and it took everything in him not to tense up, just your fingertips picking at the frayed edges of his shirt sleeve. Your knuckles grazed his bicep, right where a vein protrudes, and he watches you carefully. Like you were a wild, unpredictable animal.
Ironic.
āHmmm, guess youāre right. You do still carry a Walkman, thatās very old man of you.ā You smiled to yourself and he had to stop himself from smiling too, because he wanted you to seriously consider this. To really think about it.
Your eyes met his and his expression was so unreadable. Bushy blonde brows furrowed, lips keeping themselves from quirking into a smirk. You stared at his lips a beat too long and he felt the urge to lean over and taste your mouth.
āThatās - Iām serious, Iām not who you think I am. Iām not what you think I am, and - ā
You interrupt him with a scoff, rolling your eyes and he actually gawks. Itās so bratty itās almost endearing coming from you.
āI see what hours you come home, you literally have a bruise on your cheek right now,ā you make a point to touch his face, to press your thumb lightly against the blue patch of flesh and he has to fight the urge to close his eyes and keen into the touch. He smells vanilla against the pulse on your wrist.
āso if youāre trying to make a point about some seedy job you have, I donāt care. And maybe I like old men, ever considered that?ā
Heās shocked for a couple of reasons. Youāre still acting as though none of this is a big deal, as if it means absolutely nothing that heās nearly 20 years your senior, or that youāve noticed heās oftentimes injured.
Youāre perceptive. Thatāsā¦good?
āYou like old men?ā His eye is twitching, and you give him a goofy smile, like you know exactly why you said it that way and what it would do to him.
āNo, actually. I just like you.ā You lean your head against his arm thatās draped across the back of the couch, lightly caging you in.
And then heās wrapped up again, hot from the inside out. He decides right then and there to give it right back to you, to make you just as squeamish and wound up as you make him. Itās not hard, heās a smart man.
So he leans in, and your smile drops and you swallow hard, and heās got you.
Heās so close you can memorize every line etched into his skin, you can almost tell exactly what caused the thick scar on his cheek and how many times heās ever laughed or squinted or scowled.
āSweetheart, Iām old enough to be your father.ā
Fuck. Your whole body shudders, and youāre suddenly looking at your lap, anywhere but his eyes, and itās surreal to have you so flustered like this.
You want him.
āWellā¦well I donāt care. Who cares? I mean,ā you donāt expect his pupils to be so blown out when you peer into them.
āwe get along, donāt we? You donāt enjoy our time together?ā You say it so sickeningly perfect, just enough of a soft tone to make him ache. And you donāt do it on purpose, thatās the worst part. Thatās all you.
He canāt turn you down. His body, mind, spirit wonāt let him. Heās too gone now, doe eyed and a slight tremble to your bottom lip, and itās nothing crazy but it breaks him nonetheless.
It also sends a thrill down his adamantium spine.
āYeah, sweetheart I do. But Iām not easy. You might run away. And I canāt do that, canāt let you go like that.ā
Heās past the point of being earnest, cause youāre breaking every ounce of any mask he put on. The real Dex, the one that knows where you go after work and the addresses of your co workers and exactly when to walk outside in order to assist you with groceries - heās right here behind his eyes.
āI donāt want anyone else. Canāt even think about anyone else, kiss me please?ā
You jut your chin and ask so nicely, how could he ever say no?
Itās hard, controlled at first and his hand meets the nape of your neck with skilled precious. It loosens up when you go slack under his touch. Like you couldnāt possibly think about anything else but how his tongue feels against your bottom lip.
Then youāre grabbing his face and itās heavy in your hands and you scoot yourself against his big frame until youāve got one leg thrown over his broad lap and your torso pressed directly against his side.
Heās groaning into the kiss, and your fingers find control in the locks. Your faces move this way and that way, noses smooshed together and teeth clacking. You feel something thick, and warm swelling beneath your thigh where itās thrown over his lap - and you breakaway with a string of spit connecting your lips to his.
He wipes it away with his thumb, and a wretched thing happens between your legs. A fierce throb, leaking into your panties.
āAre you hard?ā Youāre being somewhat of a menace, but you canāt help it. Just to provoke the reactions only you can out of him, itās worth it. You can feel his pulse thundering.
āYeah, I am honey.ā No point in lying when you can feel it, when you start to move your leg up and down to rub at the bulge that strains in his jeans.
He peers down, watches your soft, plush flesh and how it presses against his covered cock. He tries to hold it back, tries to rein it in but he canāt stop the bucking of his hips. You move even closer to him, deciding to climb onto his lap completely with your hands steadied on his broad shoulders.
His grip immediately finds your waist, and he takes a stuttered breath like he never thought this would really happen, that it would only be something he fantasized about and thatās it.
Because your weight is perfect on top of him, and heās gentle when he rubs your back, stares up at you like youāre holding the world. Youāre real and warm and right here.
āI feel it twitching against me.ā You observe, beginning to grind your center against him. Itās heavy and firm, and the seam of his jeans catches you right between your puffy lips and steadily swelling clit.
āJesus, fuck.ā He groans while his fingertips press into your hips, push and pull you against him to aid your rutting.
He drags you down again, but this time he nudges your jaw to the side with his nose and mouths at your neck. This elicits a whimper of the most salacious kind, and he keeps you pinned to his relentless tongue exploring your earlobes and carotid.
āThisās what you wanted, huh?ā His voice is rough and low in all the right places.
āWant it all, everything with you.ā
This shakes him more than heād like to admit. Youāre nothing if not honest, too honest because now youāre cracked completely open with lust and hunger and wild eyes.
āCanāt just say things like that - look at me, look at me.ā
And you do. Your gaze doesnāt waver, doesnāt divert in the slightest.
āSay it again, please.ā He begs. Though his expression isnāt pleading, isnāt aggressive though either. Just true. Heartbreakingly earnest.
āI want everything with you. I want you.ā
It couldnāt have been more perfect. And it couldnāt have been more solidifying.
everyone on tiktok being like āhow could ilya ghost shane like that itās not fair heās being so meanā not knowing as soon as ilya shows any non-sexual affection towards shane, shane literally runs out of the apartment and then gets a girlfriend lol
