A/N: This is a submission for Roo’s Classic Literature Writing Challenge hosted by @theimaginesyouneveraskedfor. I’m submitting multiple, so this is just the first of many. When I saw the quote, I couldn’t help but feel it was for Loki:
“I look at you and a sense of wonder takes me.”
— Homer, The Odyssey
Thank you for letting me participate! :)
Also, I do not own the GIF above. Just thought I should say that.
Fandom: Marvel
Pairing: Husband!Loki Laufeyson x Wife!Reader
Synopsis: After being imprisoned in Asgard for his crimes, you, Loki’s wife begin to visit him in his cell. One day, he asks you why.
Rated: PG-13
Warnings: Mild angst, Very Mild Gore, Mentions of Character Death, Thor: The Dark World Spoilers, & Triggers (such as an Unhappy Marriage)
“Why do you insist on seeing me each and every day?”
Your husband’s question had come about an hour into your visit. He was never very talkative, so your time was usually spent in silence. You often brought a book with you to pass the time, and, on occasion, you would read to him. It never occured to you that your presence would be a burden on him or annoying to him.
You were his wife, after all, even if it was through an arrangement between your parents and his.
Although, you did not blame him for asking this, after all he had done. The list was quite long; you could probably write a trilogy detailing all the ways he had wronged, not just you, but everyone. He had abandoned you, broken promise after promise. He made you feel worthless, like something that had been thrust upon him. He tried to murder his brother; he tried to steal the throne from his father. He tried to take over Midgard, killing many in the process.
So why did you insist on seeing him everyday?
For the same reason Frigga did when she was alive. For the same reason Thor still gave him chances. For the same reason Loki would never do you any harm directly or intentionally.
You had hope, and you could attempt to understand why he was the way he was. He had his reasons, good ones.
“Because I love you.” It was the first time you had said it to him, hence the pregnant silence that followed. There was truth to the words; you had not said them to make him feel better or to simply give him a reason.
You didn’t really know why or when you started to love him, but the heart-wrenching feeling you got when he returned, the disappointment you felt towards his actions, and the loneliness you felt while separated from him was enough to convince you. You loved him.
“You jest.” He sighed, finally, turning his head away from you as he paced the cell. “Although, I don’t find it particularly funny, wife.”
You let out an exasperated breath as you closed your book and placed it on the table next to you; you uncrossed your legs, coming to stand in front of your chair. Straightening out your emerald green skirt before strolling over to your restless husband, you considered your next move carefully. Everything involving Loki was strategic; he was a calculating man, and in order to properly convince him of anything, you had to be just as thoughtful.
“I do not jest. To be honest, I’m a bit insulted that you think I do,” you stated plainly because you wanted to communicate with him. You wanted to be open with him. It was the only way your relationship would ever amount to anything remotely happy.
“‘Because I love you’,” he repeated, venom behind each syllable. “You say it too easily.”
“Have you considered that I say it so easily because it is, in fact, how I feel about you?” you suggested, deciding to fight his pigheadedness with logic.
He made a circle around you, hands folded behind his back as he let your question sink in. “Why?” He stopped walking, twisting the upper portion of his body to face you. “I have given you no reasons to feel that way about me.”
“Now, you jest.” You grinned at him, copying his stance.
“I have been nothing but neglectful as a husband. You would have been better off married to Thor.”
“Perhaps, but I am married to you. And I love you. So why bring him into this conversation?” You crossed your arms over your chest, your features falling. Why did he always bring things back to the God of Thunder? You had nothing to do with him, and it was very rare that the two of you spent time together.
Loki didn’t have an answer for you. He stopped in the middle of his circle around you, eyes roaming your form before finally resting on your face. The expression he wore was one you were familiar with, one that never ceased to frustrate you. You could never tell what he was thinking, what was going on in that mind of his.
He took a few steps closer to you, his arms falling from behind his back to rest at his sides as he tilted his head. “Sometimes, when I look at you, a sense of wonder takes me.” He took your chin between his thumb and second finger, lifting it slightly. His warm breath fanned your cheek. “Question after question...I wonder how someone like you could want to be with someone like me.”
You parted your lips to point out how absurd he was acting, but he hushed you and continued to talk. “I wonder what you do when you’re alone, if you drop that happy, brazen act of yours. I’ve seen the other side of you. I get glimpses from time to time, but I never understood why you would slip so easily in front of me. Perhaps you gave me my answer a few minutes ago when you claimed to have feelings for me.”
You blinked, breaking eye contact for just that brief second, but when you looked at him again, his face was centimeters from yours. His gaze faltered, dropping to your lips before returning to drown you in its forest.
“Well, I have no more to hide, then.”
The room, including Loki, changed in an instant. The clean furniture was in ruins, strewn about the place. Shattered glass littered the floor, and your husband, who had been standing right before you, touching you, was sitting against the wall, yards away. He looked utterly broken, his black locks in disarray, his eyes sunken and lifeless.
You strolled over to him, holding back tears when you saw the forced smile on his lips.
“Do you still love me?” he asked, sarcastically, staring up at you when you stood before him.
You did not answer him right away, falling to your knees in front of him and wrapping your arms around his neck. You held him for a moment before whispering against his shoulder, “Of course I do.”
The man in your hold snickered but slid his hands up your back, pressing you closer to him. “What a wonder you are, my darling.”