Time immediately drawing his sword when the door shut is just perfect. Not only does he instantly switch to attack mode when the situation changes but he knew Four would pull out the lamp and assess the situation probably quicker than he could since Time's adventure skills are a little rusty.
That said, even Wind is impressed with his reflexes. Old man or not, Time's still got it.
Warriors: Old man we've held an intervention and we all agree that you need to cut back on the milk.
Time: [nodding solemnly] That is fair, I've never much been a man to drink. Don't know how it happened really.
Time: I start today.
[cue an explosion a couple hundred metres away, throwing up debris, monsters, the chain's disaster duo and one unfortunate white cloaked casualty hero]
Warriors: Hylia help us, isn't that the monster camp we were going to dispatch after lunch?
Time: [uncorking a bottle of milk] I start tomorrow.
Time sternly dads the punks into not being bad people. Has the experience and wisdom to pull an Uncle Iroh and get them to sort their lives out. Except Time doesn't actually have to say anything, just the mere presence of a strong father figure is enough to get the kidnappers to change their ways. That look in his eyes. He's not mad, he's just disappointed.
Warriors plays along. Weaves a sob story told so well it does lower their guard. In a couple hours he's safely secured their entire crime history, family backgrounds, and blackmail material for the authorities of this era to lock them away for life. Goal achieved, he suddenly completely switches up character, calmly thanking them for their time before breaking out his restraints and single handedly messing them all up.
Twilight: the silent type. Stares them down until they start sweating. His vibe radiates: “I supplexed gorons when I was a teenager. I'm not trapped in here with you, you're trapped here with me.” Before the kidnappers can start arguing about who has to stay in the room with him, Twilight just gets up, his restraints falling like wet paper, and walks out the door while they cower in the corner fearing for their lives.
Sky kills them with kindness. Starts with small shallow compliments which as they respond positively to and end up telling him more about themselves, letting his affirmations hit deeper and deeper until they're convinced to change their ways. To mark this new chapter in their lives he leads them to the nearest goddess statue to repent to his girlfriend.
Legend comes out of the gate tearing his captors a new one. But somehow, the insults cut a little too close to home. Next thing you know, they’re defending themselves, then explaining, then venting. Legend keeps calling them pathetic, but in a way that weirdly encourages them to keep going. So oddly, it becomes a group trauma dump session.
Hyrule: [positioned outside the room] Shouldn't we go in there and get him? It sounds like a fight's about to break out.
Sky: [equipping a clipboard and quill] No no, let him cook. He's making great progress.
With Wild the chain's rescue mission becomes trying to get him back on the team. Cuz you see, Wild's with the kidnappers now. Wasn’t even tied up to begin with. Just vibing in the corner eating all their food. His lack of any sense of danger or fear made them think he was a new recruit. He went along with it, and started assigning them nicknames and chore duties. Grandmaster reverse stockholm syndrome—they start following his lead.
Four plays mind games. Starts casual: “What’s your name?” “What motivates you?” “What’s your greatest regret?” By the first hour he’s ignited a civil war with members either fighting tooth and nail against their fellow men or suffering spirals of deep existential dread. There's a reason Four doesn't share much of what goes on in his head because this is the end result, and no one is having fun anymore. Except Four and his shadow.
Hyrule plays actual games. At first Hyrule just got bored and so interrupted their evil plan spiel offering to bet on how long it would take him to escape. However, that led to other bets being made, dumb challenges like how many rupees one can stack before they collapse, winner keeps their pile of the pool. He gets so into these games he completely forgets he was supposed to be escaping. And his captors forget he has backup coming.
Twilight: [knocking down the door] Hyrule! Don't worry it's okay! We're here to...wait, are you gambling right now?
Hyrule: [rolling dice] Wait five more minutes. It's my turn and I'm definitely gonna win!
Warriors: We didn't come here to stop one crime just to walk in on you committing one!
Hyrule: One? [pulls out a near empty wallet]
Twilight: [turning to Warriors] He's bankrupted us.
Warriors: [face palming] I told Time not to let Hyrule carry the group travel funds.
Wind is pretty good at playing the 'innocent grandma’s boi' shtick. Will get them to fawn over him, give him life advice, offer snacks, meanwhile he’s already stolen all their keys and is just waiting for nightfall. That said, if the chain don't arrive quick enough Wind's captors might indulge the boy and give him his first tattoo or piercing.
~~~
Thanks for reading! Some of these are more unserious than others.
