Sera: Summoner's Hall, what's your emergency?
Lugina: Aaargh, I Macaulay Culkin'd myself and I can't move!
Lugina: I booby-trapped my house before I left for Cordelica!
Sera: Sorry, you Macaulay-
Lugina: I got shithoused off of six quarts of Chardonnay on the journey home, I totally forgot.
Lugina: No, I'm not okay!! I triggered the whole dang pulley system when I opened the door! I lit my head on fire, got slammed in my peener by a swinging paint can and did a godsdamn gainer on a bunch of marbles!
Sera: OK, I'm calling an ambulance.
Lugina: Look, tell 'em to hurry. That egg timer goes off, I'm done for.
Sera: What happens when the egg timer goes off?
Lugina: Ohh, it was gonna be the grand finale. The timer, the pulleys, knocking over the bees, oh-ho, sweet justice on the bad guys! ...Ohhhhh, boy. Here it comes!! Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal!
Sera: Uh, happy holidays?
Lugina: AAAAAAAGGGH, IT'S A REFERENCE!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHH!!