#meadow posts

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Tumb.

special interests are disabling even if they don't prevent you from doing anything other than stuff related to them.

special interests are disabling if they prevent you from doing anything other than stuff related to them.

forgetting to eat, drink, sleep, hygiene, interact with others, do responsibilities, because of disability, is disabling.

having your mind/thoughts/focus consumed and/or unable to be distracted from the disability symptom, is disabling.

disabling does not always feel horrendous, though it often feels uncomfortable, bad, or stressful when challenged - and those claiming special interests aren't disabling aren't having their special interests challenged

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Hypixel skyblock Hypixel skyblock Hypixel skyblock Hypixel skyblock beloved

so much to do i cant think of anything else

live think breathe Hypixel skyblock

maybe if i make my code editor Dusk themed and maybe design the theme to be Dusk themed it will be tolerable to code again

brain wants to change attempt to create work for self into focused on Hypixel Skyblock but do not have the capacity to do that and just barely past the starting bit of developing an app

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tfw another part of your system has a flashback reliving it at least slightly? and learning about it via asking what happened to trigger the memory deletion & watching it get deleted

only for yourself to fake claim it having been a real memory/flashback/anything an hour? two hours? later? because there's no way someone would experience that and be emotionally numb

ah yes very healthy behaviour from me. at least i recognise it this time.

dont do this at home kids

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you know, more people than you expect are probably systems without realising how bad of fucking trauma they went through if they are having multiple voices in their head talking to them

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*Tumb

my opinions differ greatly from the other parts of my brain, please do not get pissed off or either me or them will block lol

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"i was tired"

"i wasn't thinking straight"

"i was overwhelmed"

are you sure you are the same part that was around when saying what you did? lol

@ my system

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the most terrifying thing on the planet is waking up to the wisdom of why your family knows when you switch without knowing you are a system

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Is this a real crash, or is it just fantasy