The worst thing about studying science is the realisation that you aren't anything but chemicals and molecules bouncing around propagating signals and responses to external stimuli. This 'consciousness' is nothing. nothing but chemicals and molecules integrating signals, making sense of them, propagating them onwards, all for the purpose of survival. i am a bundle of molecules and i pray everyday that they do there job right. because one little error in cell signalling (billions of pathways), one little detrimental error in my DNA replication (occurs 10^9 in every gene) and bam. i'm dead.
i am nothing and everything at the same time. the sentient nature of humans is a joke, creating a whole life that revolves around status quo and social expectations, we worry about money and jobs, when in realty the most important thing is our bodes. the structure that keeps our brains alive, keeps us motile, allows us to feed our mind and allows us to live this structured 'life' we have created.
i am one small spec of carbon on the face of the earth, and i have an amazing body that fights to keep me alive everyday, that fights to keep my sentient brain active. it uses so many mechanisms just to perform seemingly simple functions! The creation of action potentials through the opening and closing of ion gated channels (muscle contraction), the formation of the mitotic spindle in cell division allowing for the separation of sister chromatids which are made out of tiny microtubules composed of highly unstable alpha and beta tubulin complexes and not to mention the thousands and thousands of proto oncogenes which promote cell growth and devision allowing us to grow, repair and thrive in this world we call home.
ps. everything gives you cancer, legit, everything.