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if you are a trans man and have found your online or irl social group of other trans men insisting that trans men aren't "really" men, please recognize the internalized transphobia and either attempt to push back if that feels safe or get out of there. I feel like every day on here I see men telling other men that they are not and can never be men.

#I blog a lot about how this is often done with specific transmisogynist purpose & that will continue to be my priority generally #but even on a level of just empathy for specifically trans men looking for community with peers this stuff seems so toxic and awful.#if anyone is trying to sell you ''you will never be a man'' as trans positivity--even if he is also a trans man-- you gotta be careful #not all trans people have worked on unlearning their transphobia. not all trans people are even interested in trans liberation.#especially if a trans person can leverage an axis of privilege like whiteness or being tme or being thin & able-bodied or etc.#they might have less material investment in genuine trans liberation #& sometimes are willing to just hate & invalidate & misgender themselves forever if it means a half step up the ladder

There's a difference between a man who is truly intrigued by you and a man who loves women in general.

#easy to spot now that I'm older #i used to feel special when a man would really seem to like me but i can't to realize the ones that have me like that just love women #not me specifically ya know. they appreciate the true female form - “flaws” and all. they see women as people first..#they are attracted to many types of women if not all lol #it's not really a fault - we need more men in the world who just love and appreciate women and who are nice and helpful and protective etc #I just thought some other girls out there might benefit from having this thought process #Sometimes that's just a good man #And maybe that is YOUR good man but if he loves all women.. you better be prepared to let him do that #in a healthy way #cause otherwise he WILL turn it into something sneaky and weird 😂 even though it shouldn't be #ok that's my ted talk for today #highthoughts

One thing I have seen - even from other trans people! - is this specific implication that while it's inevitable that trans men pass, but trans women are essentially doomed if they want to pass.

I could talk for days about the intricacies of passing for trans people in general. I could talk for hours about why some trans people want to pass, and that it shouldn't be forced. I could talk about the intricacies for trans men and others when it comes to passing because the dynamics don't play out the way it does for cis men a lot of times. But what gets me is the idea that trans women could never pass, that those who do are essentially anomalies is... nasty. It's got nasty implications, and it's feels even nastier when trans people do it.

Trans women, trans men, trans people of all types shouldn't be required, pressured, or forced to pass. That is true. But to say that passing is nigh impossible for an entire subsect of trans people will never not read as evil.

#trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #mtf #nonbinary #transphobia tw #i keep seeing this from other trans people and it's horrifying #you know what you're implying right.#because there is a DIFFERENCE between 'it can be harder for some people to pass' and 'these trans people CAN'T pass'#it's harder for some people to pass! sometimes it's by choice and sometimes it isn't! acknowledging that is crucial #what isn't crucial is to take that and then go 'well none of you pass'#and this is always framed like... trans men and trans women are on diametrically opposed sides #and the argument then reads to me like: see the TRANS MAN gets to pass but you CAN'T. you LITERALLY can't. passing is IMPOSSIBLE for you #how is that anything BUT transphobia. and why is it normalized.#you can critique passing without doing this! you can analyze the dynamics of passing without doing this! i do it many times!#passing HAS impacted me in very nuanced ways and it's COMPLICATED. i of all people get that #i specifically talk about how gross it sounds for trans women because i think y'all are more OPENLY viciously hostile towards them #though that isn't to say that that vitriol is reserved only for one group of trans people

I hate how frequently I see posts from TRFs to the effect of:

“As a transfem, what you’re saying about the transfem experience and our oppression is incorrect. Do not speak on that if you aren’t a trans woman/fem because you do not have the experience to speak on this. Anyway, now let me, as a transfem, explain the entirety of how trans men’s and mascs’ oppression works and what their experiences are like.”

I think, maybe, the problem is any trans person trying to assert they know any other trans person’s experiences. But hey, maybe that’s just me and I need to shut up because I’m a dumb transandrobro and need my experiences explained to me.

#my post #transandrophobia #transmisandry #anti-transmasculinity #‘if trans men think they couldn’t be treated worse they should try sticking up for trans women sometime’ as though that’s the worst a trans #man will ever be treated is when he’s sticking up for someone else #plus the assumption that the trans men saying they aren’t privileged must not be sticking up for trans women #(yes this is aimed at a specific post while also being about a trend lol)

Help! I just saw the dumbest Dan is Queer actually take in the tags. Why are we still doing this?

edit: since people on here can't read allow me to be so clear that i'm not saying dan ISN'T queer/identifies with that label as well. but that's not the same thing as him being queer instead of gay. thanks

possible reasons why someone still insists dan is not just a boring homosexual in the year of our lord 2025:

1. they want to fuck him and they're not his type

2. they themselves are queer/bisexual/insert whichever other label here and either just want him to be the same as them or project onto him too hard and therefore genuinely believe there is no way he could just be a gay man because their own complicated journey with labels and attraction resulted in them concluding they were [insert label here] and therefore dan, because he made the grave error of admitting to having a complex relationship with his identity, must also secretly fit and identify with said label

3. they want to fuck him and they're not his type

4. for queer specifically, they heard him say he identifies with both gay and queer six years ago and for some reason think the latter overrides the former and also that none of the idk hundred times since he's made it clear Gay is the label he primarily uses don't matter to them, because: see points 1-3

5. they genuinely just do not understand how labels work and/or believe that everyone on the planet is actually secretly bisexual (😐)

6. they want to fuck him and they're not his type

#i can't sleep i shouldn't rile myself up like this at 3am lmao but this topic does it every time i'm sorry #idk as a lesbian on the internet especially in a fandom about two men who people for soem god forsaken reason want to fuck real bad #people's inability to grasp the concept of A Gay Person pisses me the fuck off like to an insane degree #my fucking inbox sometimes man it's insane 💀#and we can argue forever about the very specific intricacies of dan's attraction and never get anywhere bc dude i don't even think He knows #but it doesn't matter and it's none of our business because at the end of the day he's said time and time again he identifies as a gay man #a homosexual if you will #and that shouldn't be so damn hard to just respect #TIRED!!!!!#ok sorry again. bad idea to post this and then log off probably but ummm well #answered

i know bts have more than enough money at their disposal to have their own stylists outside of performances/schedules and that the clothes they wear sometimes even during their downtime are more often than not influenced by some kind of brand partnership. that being said the fact that yoongi seems to have such great personal style makes him a million times sexier to me sorry SORRY

#aqua speaks #you can see that there are certain styles of clothes he really fucks with and knows look good on him #to the point where even when he IS actively working with a brand he chooses/gets styled in garments with those specific silhouettes #also evidenced by the fact that he’s an outfit repeater bc how many times have we seen that one fear of god shirt #or certain hats or shoes etc.#the bar is in hell but something about a man who knows how to dress himself and knows what he likes #I Love It when men have personal taste that’s actually good #min yoongi understated cuntress #the exact opposite of my aquarius brother in arms junghoseok #i respect the hell out of hoseok’s personal style (and everyone else’s) but sometimes even i am like wtf is on your back bro #and what is on your feet for that matter #WHICH. IF HE LIKES IT I’M COOL! he wears the hell out of those ugly ass shoes #but yoongi’s taste in clothes is just 😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛

sometimes i am afraid i am overdoing it when i talk about “hey. isn’t this thing kind of woman-hatey” and then i think about it for longer than a second and it’s like no actually we need to get woker NOW.

#fam put on a silly xmas movie about a guy accidentally finding a baby and having to take care of it for 24 hrs (?)#and the comedy all comes from this guy being so incompetent about it. not knowing how to change a diaper or burp a baby or anything #yeah haha so funny! man doesn’t know how to take care of a child! what an uncommon trope!#do we ever see women in this trope..?#talking to my sisters earlier about men using the word ‘bitch’ actually i do not like it at all. very selective cases in which im ok w it #my sister was like ‘yeah its weird from straight men but kind of funny if gay men’ no actually. respectfully i disagree #whether ur attracted to women has NOTHING to do with whether u respect women as people actually!!!#and being gay does not exempt u from misogyny!!!#really feeling thag one ‘i cannot stop seeing it’ meme like that literally is how it is.#h*eated r*valry too. happy to get another mainstream mlm media but i also cannot help but think #the exact same story w/ female leads would not have gotten a FRACTION of the attention #n on that note have watched so much tv (uncharacteristic for me) over break so far #too many characters that are Women and not People. do u get what i mean. male writers gain some fucking empathy challenge #i will probablt delete this in the morning im just upset abt specific little things that have piled up this break #+ shitty takes i keep seeing online. the gr*k bullshit on twt is nauseating genuinely #ugh.#thinking.#that slow realization u have in high school that even ur best male friends talk to each other in such a nauseatingly different way #than they do with you #all of them! never let ur guard down.#have even heard shitty takes from the otherwise nicest men ive met bc its such a. specific flavor of ignorance #and i never ever blame people for not experiencing/understanding smth as long as they have an open mind #but its literally a shock sometimes. how much that ignorance is enabled.#like ‘i don’t hold it against u for having an ignorant view before someone explains an experience to u but also how the fuck did u develop #that in the first place when it’s literally not an option for anyone treated like a girl growing up’#phae.txt #GRAHHHHHHHHHH.#i have more to say . but this is disjoint enough as it is

First of all omg thank you for updating today my sign ups at uni took the entire morning and part of the afternoon and I spent it reading the chapter on and off 💜 beautiful timing

Do you happen to have drawn the drip for the clan meeting from any of the other clans? 👁️ 👁️ Or also alternatively do you have a doc or visual aid for the different clans and their representatives? I know it's probably silly buy I love knowing more or less who's who and I'm having trouble keeping track (⁠•⁠ ⁠▽⁠ ⁠•⁠;⁠)

and THE CHAPTER WAS SO GOOD GAGSJSLLAKSJA that bamf zhongli tag is preening rn