Lesser Known Coping Mechanisms
The best way to deal with problems of great importance is always by seeking out the help of a professional who is trained to help you. However, if the problem is something a bit less urgent and you are confident you can deal with it on your own, here’s a few coping mechanisms that not a lot of people know about.
I'll try to explain how each one may help and what they may help with but please keep in mind that these aren't for everyone so even if one seems like it might be a good fit for you, there’s no guarantee that it will work.
Staring at a wall or blank surface: Okay so I may have already lost you but hear me out. Often times when the outside world becomes too much, we try to block it out by closing our eyes and straightening our thoughts. Unfortunately, some of us are more prone to create less than desirable images in our minds if our eyes were shut. If your brain doesn't have to process what it is seeing because it is blank or has a repeating pattern then you can deal with your thoughts in a more productive manner.
Empathetic Projection (via thoughts or writing): I don't actually know if there's a better term for what I'm describing but “empathetic projection" seems like a good way to phrase it. This one is for if you're heated or just don't understand a person's reasoning behind an action that effected you. For those who are great at vividly picturing things, you can do it in your head but it can also be done by writing. It's basically putting yourself in the person's shoes and walking through the decisions they made. Really tell the story from their perspective then extrapolate a bit if you're looking at how to approach an apology.
Ventriloquism: This one is more for fun and is often used as more of an escape than anything else. If what you really need is some lighthearted distractions then ventriloquy may be for you.
Finger Tapping: Here's one for if you're more just anxious about something. It's a temporary fix like slapping a band-aid over a dam but if you just need something small to help you chill out then this could really help. Drumming your fingers can lead to more anxiety because you may attract the attention of those around you but tapping your thumb to the tips of each of your fingers in a repetitive motion is a fantastically subtle grounding technique. You can do it on one hand or two and it can be concealed in a pocket if absolutely necessary.
Perspective Swap: This is for my friends out there whose low self esteem leads to self destructive behavior. Imagine that a friend or someone you really care about (sometimes a pet) is going through a similar situation that you are. You just want them to be happy and get through their problems so what advice do you give them? This is one of the simpler ones but it really does help.
Counting: Bring your brain back to its primitive, pattern-seeking routes with this one. This one is another distraction but counting anything and everything around you is a good way to temporarily take your mind off things. Depending on your location, you can count blue things, the number of Adidas sneakers in the room, floor tiles, amounts of time passerbys say the word, “Yeah,” and plenty of other things. Do be careful that you don't pressure yourself with this one if you find that you can't count all of one thing and remember that it's not any sort of rest so nobody is going to be double checking your work.
Delving Into The Imagination: This one works better alone since you might not want to be interrupted but having fun with your imagination is just as good as any other healthy distraction mechanism sometimes. You can picture yourself doing anything or make up your own stories and fanfics that you'll never have to worry about writing. Again, this one is more for fun if you're having difficulty finding something to take your mind off things.
That’s all I've got for you. I would like to reiterate that these are all well and good in moderation and some or all may not work for you. Just remember that conventional ways of coping like crying are also perfectly healthy. You're a human and sometimes you don't need to find a perfect way to cope with every situation.
Feel free to criticize me, correct me, or leave comments (positive or otherwise). If saying things that would be considered rude helps you feel heard and validated, I will not silence you.
